No Uncertain Terms
by desina
Summary: This story sticks to canon, but has significant interstitial scenes that change the meaning of the canon. Like, say, sleeping together in the Borderline timeframe. Disclaimer: I don't own Fairly Legal. If I did, I'd own Ben and that would be AWESOME. :D Each chapter that corresponds to an episode will be named with that episode title.
1. Chapter 1: What They Seem

**a/n: Fixed a couple of typos and an S1 canon oops, but no major changes to this chapter.**

Ben stood confidently, legs spread, briefcase in both hands, in the courthouse after Chernof's case settled, watching Kate. His favorite hobby.

Naturally, Justin had to walk up just then. Ben leaned against the wall and pretended not to watch the two of them. He'd looked up their divorce case: it had very little information, really, except they'd been together since she was a college freshman and he was a junior, got married six weeks after they met, and six years later - almost to the day - Justin had filed for divorce citing irreconcilable differences. So they'd been together almost ten years in total before the divorce was final, though they were not living together all that time.

It had taken six months from the time they could have signed the decree for that to happen, and he suspected that was Katie's stalling. Ben had noticed that she'd signed the paperwork, as she'd said that night in the bar, within a couple of weeks after they first met, but he knew it had nothing to do with meeting him and everything to do with her finally starting to move on.

Ben tried to imagine what his life would be like if he'd taken a similar path: he'd met Beth in his sophomore year, neither of them being able to afford anything other than a state school. She'd helped him work past the worst of his dyslexia by reading important documents aloud, which was frankly the reason he'd stuck with her long after he had decided he'd had to end it.

After their 1L year, Alessandra had commented that, while Beth had good command of the law, she didn't have the drive to succeed in her career because she couldn't manage anything other than small strategy. For weeks after, Ben had watched Beth's interactions, and it was true. He also got Alessandra's implied point: Beth would never be successful, and Ben wanted success more than he wanted Beth. Katie, however, had he kind of drive Beth didn't. Katie cared about results far more than she cared about money, and that made up for her relative inability to manage big-picture strategy.

He took a job with Alessandra's employer between law school terms as a clerk, mostly filing, so he could afford help in getting through his coursework. He'd made it through his second and third years of law school with flying colors and a small amount of extra cash from the work. Better, he now had connections, all because he'd been motivated by stepping away from Beth.

Ben looked up at just the wrong time.

"Hey, uhh, just for the record, if you wanted to be used, or-" Justin said to Kate, which jerked Ben out of his thoughts. Justin was staring right at him, essentially suggesting to Kate that she date Ben, "not used, but, look, what I'm saying is- If you wanted to be used-" Ben resisted the urge to laugh; enough people had laughed over his awkward moments that he learned not to laugh at other people's. One thing was sure, though, Justin didn't think Ben was capable of serious relationships. Unfortunately, it seemed Kate felt the same way.

Yet, there was something else. Justin's line to Kate from earlier in the case still echoed through Ben's head, "You cannot mediate this because you have already chosen a side." It seemed to have multiple meanings to it, which is why Ben allowed a smile, then wiped it off his face. He wanted to be the chosen side, he just wasn't seeing that kind of progress with Kate, at least not yet. Apparently Justin was, though.

"Ben Grogan?" Kate said in surprise. Pity he couldn't hear all of the context. "Nooooooo." Kate protested. Ben resisted smiling. _The lady doth protest too much, methinks._ She'd thought about dating him, but was resisting the idea. Only a matter of time, Ben.

Her inattentional blindness demonstration had really affected him, especially toward the end when she'd put her hand on his stomach and traced her fingers downward, running them along his belt line, then telling him they could have an even bigger payday. "Isn't that what you love?"

His lips quivered, and he'd answered, "Mostly." It had been difficult to say not only because he was so distracted, but because it was a lie. In that moment, he'd have done absolutely anything she asked. Worse, she knew it.

Ben's attention snapped back to the present, sneaking a look at Justin and Kate as Justin started gesturing.

Then Justin told started stammering, which led to quite an awkward exchange between the two of them that ended with Kate saying, "You're weird."

She seemed to miss the conversation's subtext, though, which was that Justin was letting her know that he himself was beginning to date. She didn't want to hear that, which was curious.

After Justin left, Kate crossed the room to where Ben was standing.

"I'm going to celebrate the Chernof case victory. How about you?"

"Where are you going?"

He told her about the restaurant and bar he thought might be comfortable for her, one he thought wouldn't be threatening for her to go to with him.

"I'm not up for dinner, but I'll have a drink or two."

He smiled. It was a start. He'd take it.

He drove her to the restaurant, and her face fell a bit when she saw the building.

"Are you seriously taking me to a hotel, Ben?"

"I'm taking you to a bar and restaurant. It happens to be in a hotel. It's not the pickup joint I first saw you in where you were so uncomfortable, and it's got nice candles and mirrors. Just ignore the rest of the building." Why had Justin picked that bar, anyway? The more Ben knew about Justin, the weirder it seemed. It clearly hadn't been Katie's choice.

"If you say so."

"I thought you'd like the decor."

As they walked into the restaurant, Kate's arm in the crook of Ben's, she admitted to herself that he'd made a good choice.

They made small talk for a while, but she wasn't her usual self. Time for him to push a bit. "To partners."

"Uhh. Whatever."

"Look at you, agreeing to have a drink with me." Several tequila shots and counting, actually. He'd definitely have to see her home at this point, so he made sure to sip his Arrogant Bastard Ale more slowly so he could drive. Otherwise, he wasn't sure what would happen to her; she didn't strike him as a heavy drinker.

"Oh, slow down there, cowboy. You know what? I just needed a bar and somebody with a car to drive me there." She'd apparently forgotten that he'd mentioned the place first, but that was Kate for you.

"What is the matter? You're the queen of win-win. This is win-win-win." He knew what the matter was, but she wouldn't fess up. Alcohol wasn't going to help, either.

Then Justin and his date walk in, and Kate overreacts, manhandling Ben and telling him not to look at Justin's date, and Ben realizes she did understand the earlier conversation after all, she just hadn't been willing to talk to him about it. He didn't even know who she would talk to about these things; he knew she had friends outside work, but she apparently rarely saw them.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Ben asked, every moment of her discomfort painful to watch.

"No. No. Nono. I'm fine. I'm good." She downed her drink, then gestured at him. "Let's get out of here. I'm good. Can we go?"

She was very, very far from good. Ben sighed. "Yeah," he said, just above a whisper. He could understand how she felt, though he'd never been married. Relationships never truly seemed quite over for him until he heard about - or saw - the women in his life dating someone else. He'd gotten used to it and callous about it, but Justin seemed to have been the only significant relationship in Kate's life. She wasn't used to it and was taking it a lot harder.

"Mmhmm. Good. Let's go." She grabbed his wrist and led him out of the restaurant.

"Where to?" he asked when they were enroute to his car.

"Lauren's," she said.

"You sure?"

"I'm fine," she insisted again, turning away and staring out the window.

"I'm sorry about what I said earlier, about it being win-win-win. I didn't know." The last wasn't entirely true, but he really didn't know how she'd react. Good thing he hadn't asked her out yet; she needed some more time.

"You couldn't have." She looked out the window. "Losing sucks, and I never lose." She looked back at him.

"We all lose sometimes. We just hope it's not about anything important."

"Marriage is important."

"Not to him though, given that he cheated on you."

"You're one to talk, cheating on your ex-fiancée."

"The relationship was over for me after she cheated. I was just being a vindictive jackass. I still don't get why Justin would cheat on you."

"What do you mean?"

"I can't imagine any man with any sense cheating on you, that's what I mean."

She smiled, the first smile he'd seen from her since her conversation with Justin. "He said it was when we were fighting."

"Lots of couples fight and never cheat. You know, I've been through this a few times, being dumped and seeing my ex with someone new."

"Someone better looking?"

"She wasn't better looking, just for the record - just different. Like you, I was always convinced they were better looking too. Or richer. Or something. It was hell." Justin's date did seem like more like Justin's type, though. A good DA's wife, which Kate definitely was not.

Kate looked down, but didn't say anything. Ben pulled up into Lauren's driveway.

"So. What basically happens is you love and you lose and then the person you lost finds someone else and wins. So, love is basically an eternal return to hell. For losers." Like me.

Kate got out of the car and Ben walked her to the door. she said, "You know," she touched her index finger to his chest, "you wondered what would have happened if we'd have gone home together."

"Yeah," he said sheepishly. More than wondered.  
"Was it everything you hoped for?"

"Yeah, It's exactly how I imagined it. You're miserable and I have to pee."

Kate stumbled as she reached the door. She laughed and slapped the door several times.

"You okay there, sailor?"

"Oh yeah." She opened the door. Ben turned to leave. "You want to come inside?" Ben stared at her for a minute, wondering what was going through her head. "To pee."

"Yes. Please."

After he returned from the bathroom, Kate stood looking out the window. She turned to him and asked, "Can I ask you a favor?" She turned away from the window, looking away from Ben.

"Sure. Winning and money has put me in a very good mood." He buttoned his suit jacket.

"You know, you and I are very different people, but you are exactly what I need right now." She turned to face him.

Ben didn't say anything, wondering how to react. He shifted on his feet, tilted his head, but said nothing. He definitely wanted to spend the night with her, just not like this. He put his hands in his pockets.

She moved toward him slowly. "Someone who's not going to mind if I use them. That's your gift, right? Not caring? And. . . empty? The Russian doll." She opened his jacket. "Stay."

If he stayed, Ben knew he'd never have her respect. What she thought of him was, well insulting. he moved backward, looked down, and smiled. "I think I'll pass." He looked up at her. "It's late."

Kate pressed her hands together as if in prayer.

Ben started down the stairs, then stopped and turned back toward Kate. Her back remained toward him. "No, you know what? You and I may have different methods, but we both know how to get what we want. You can call that being passionate, or you can call it being a dogged jackass, but you can't call it empty." Kate turned to face him, arms crossed. "I'm not empty. I'll see you tomorrow, Kate. Good night."

#

Kate moved closer to the window and watched Ben's Aston Martin drive away.

She had totally screwed up. Totally, totally screwed up. If she'd just shut up and not been mean, he might have stayed. If she'd asked him to hold her instead of propositioning him, he probably would have.

She couldn't even look him in the eye until after the proposition hung in the air.

Damn it, why did she have to go and ruin everything?

Kate tried to imagine what it'd be like, Ben sitting on the couch in the darkened living room, Kate curled up in his arms, legs stretched out. Ben's jacket and tie off, adorable perpetually touseled hair within reach, sleeves rolled up, shirt unbuttoned maybe a little too far, his sandalwood-and-lime scent eveloping her along with his arms, his kissable lips temptingly close.

She got undressed, pulled extra down pillows onto the bed, and slid under the covers. She hugged the fluffy pillows like they were Ben, then cried herself to sleep.

#

All the way home, he kept replaying Kate's attempted seduction in his mind. It's not that he was opposed to meaningless revenge sex in principle - he'd been the third party a few times, possibly more he didn't know about - but he didn't want to have any kind of meaningless sex with Kate, not even on the first night he'd met her.

Then there was the issue of alcohol. Though he'd picked up women in bars more times than he'd cared to count, he'd never slept with anyone he knew was drunk, not unless they'd slept together before - and he'd stopped doing even that after Lydia. Consent was a slippery enough slope as it was, and it was simply a better policy to have sex only with sober people who'd explicitly said yes immediately before sex started. It wasn't worth the heartache, not to mention legal troubles, to get that part wrong.

There simply was no way Kate was anywhere near sober. Had her offer been about friendship rather than sex - someone to talk, hold her while she cried, help her sober up - he would have stayed. Once the proposition came, though, he knew he didn't have the willpower to avoid her seduction attempt. He knew how persuasive she could be. She was able to twist him into helping her for a lost cause he didn't care about. Just imagine what would happen when Kate was herself that lost cause pleading for his help. He'd have no willpower left.

When he got home, he threw all his clothes on the bed - which he never did - and headed straight for the shower. He set the water temp to ball shrinking cold, put his hands on the shower wall and beat his head against his hands while he froze solid. Why did this kind of thing always happen to him?

Fuck what Kate said, he needed better strategy. She never needed to know that he had one. Maybe Leo would help. Also, toning down the love of cash thing would probably help her impression of him. Cash could still remain his secret love.

"Do everything and say nothing," she'd said. He'd have to figure out how to accomplish that.


	2. Chapter 2: Teenage Wasteland

**Chapter Two: Teenage Wasteland**

Kate woke the next morning, and the first thing she felt was how she was holding the pillows.

"Oh, no no no," she said, leaping out of bed and walking backwards, nearly tripping over some shoes she'd put next to the dresser. "That did _not_ just happen." She finally reached the wall and leaned up against it for support. She stared at the pillows as though they'd been a scorpion poised for attack.

She didn't go to bed wishing Ben were holding her all night on Lauren's couch. It just hadn't happened. She didn't go to sleep crying because he hadn't been there with her. And she did not proposition him last night and completely blow it.

If anything showed how wrong she was about who Ben was, it was his reaction and the fact that he'd left. If he really were that empty, he wouldn't have thought twice about taking her up on her offer. Damn her for being so completely wrong.

But that didn't matter because: It. Had. Not. Happened. Last night: Did. Not. Exist.

Sadly, it was true that Justin had been out on a date last night. No amount of denial was going to change that.

Nor would any amount of denial change the fact that she had a horrific hangover. She took two ibuprofen with a cup of tap water from the bathroom sink and started the shower.

She threw a set of clothes on the bed without thinking about it, then got into the finally-warm, entirely-too-modern-for-her-taste shower, washing all her tears off her face. She had to admit that, once she reined Ben in, he'd been really good on the case they'd worked together, and she was totally glad that he'd asked for her help so an innocent cop hadn't been railroaded. They'd gotten the truth, they'd won, and both Ben and Kate had been necessary for that to happen.

Then there was the inattentional blindness demonstration. Kate slid down the wall of the shower and let the water wash over her. She'd expected to break Ben so much more quickly than she had. His eyes had slipped, sure, but it's not like she wasn't encouraging that. But in order to really get the result she'd wanted, she had to climb across the desk, lean over, and fondle him, failing to realize how much she'd wanted to Do. Just. That. It brought back memories of the thoughts she'd had at the bar that night and why she said "too late" so quickly. It's a good thing he finally broke or she'd have been doing things she'd never want Leo to know about, much less witness from a few feet away.

She got ready for the work day except for her makeup, walked upstairs, put on coffee water, grabbed a glass of orange juice, and cooked herself two eggs and two pieces of turkey bacon.

As she sat there at the kitchen counter, she couldn't help but replay the previous night in her head. How was she going to face Ben? After eating one bite of egg, she buried her face in her hands.

Just then, Lauren came in from her morning run, looked at Kate, and did a double-take. "Rough night?"

"You have no idea. One advantage of being a widow over being divorced is that you never have to see your ex with anyone else. Forever."

Lauren frowned. "Oh, Kate, you also never get to see them again. Forever. Sometimes that hurts worse."

"I'm sorry, bad analogy. I know you miss my father."

"It's okay."

Kate sat down, drank the two ibuprofen with water, and ate what little breakfast she could manage.

Why did she need to worry about facing Ben when it never happened?

#

Kate ran for the elevator. "Oh, hold the door, hold the door!" Kate entered the elevator wearing an orange blouse and purple slacks.

"Morning," said Ben, happy to see her.

"Morning." She sighed and did not look happy to see him.

"Wanna grab a martini?" he teased.

"You want to shut up?" She leaned against the elevator wall.

"Little hung over?" He teased her again, but he had been worried about her last night. Her eyes were puffy this morning, so he guessed she'd been crying.

"I don't even remember how I got home last night. Really."

"Me either." Best to just drop it? Ben changed topics. "Hey did you hear about the Golden Gate bungee jumper? He's my client."

"Oh, wow. That's your favorite kind of case. A slip and fall."

They both forced laughs, but the diss stung. After last night, Ben wanted more than ever to win her respect. He didn't know if she really didn't remember, and if her memory was screwed up, she may also think more happened than actually did and that Ben hadn't acted honorably. Best to clear the air now, then.

"Oh, shazam, now I remember. You saw Justin on a date last night, drank too much, I drove you home," Kate turned away and bit her lip while Ben continued, "and then you asked me in for meaningless revenge sex because you think I'm an empty person. Did we? No. Because I said no to you and then went home. That's right. Now I remember."

Kate pressed the elevator's emergency stop button then pushed him against the wall and grabbed his hands. "Okay. You listen up. Last night was kind of a low point for me." Ben loved being pushed against a wall by hot women, his slight smile betraying his amusement at being manhandled by Kate. Again. She was in a lot of pain, obviously, so he really tried to remove his traditional smirk, but suspected he wasn't completely successful. "So it didn't happen. Not the drinks. Not the ride. Not the Justin. Not the nothing that happened after that. Last night does not exist. You got it?" Kate pulled her hands away.

Ben leaned in close. "Only because I'm seeing him in an hour to negotiate a plea deal on the jumper," Ben crossed and disabled the emergency alarm, "does Justin exist?"

The elevator door opened, and Kate ran out.

Ben stared after her, wondering what the hell was going on in her head. After she was safely in her office, he walked quietly to his. He'd had some strange encounters with women in his life, but that - that was one of the oddest.

His nether reasons put in their vote - it was also one of the hottest. He walked to his office, where he sat down _very_ carefully lest his tailor yell at him too.

#

Later that day, Ben was in Justin's office. They'd run across each other more than once but never worked on the same cases. Until now.

Justin said some blah blah stuff about law and order and the case, and Ben replied, "So you're risk averse. Guess that could be an attractive quality at first blush." Ben picked up a baseball off Justin's desk and tossed it into the air. "But - I can see where someone might get bored." He tried to imagine Kate pushing Justin up against a wall like she'd done with him this morning, and failed to imagine it.

"Don't do that." Justin said, looking at the baseball.

Ben carefully put it back on the desk.

"_Who_ might get bored?" Justin asked. Interesting. So he was defensive about being boring, especially wih regards to Kate.

Ben made sure he didn't smirk, then lied. "The voters."

They negotiated on the Wozniak deal, then Ben said, "You're very rigid. Interesting." They shook on the deal.

#

For lunch, Ben brought tacos from his favorite taqueria to Leo, in hopes of finding out more about Kate, but only got the teensiest bit of information when Leo said, "Maybe it's the whole opposites attract thing. You know, Kate can go all crazy town and Justin's there to support her."

"So he's Kate's bungee cord."

After that, Leo stonewalled, but Ben had something to think about: Justin kept Kate in within the realm of orbital mechanics. Ben could do that, if only he showed her that he could. It hardly seemed like a reason to stay with someone so dullsville, though.

When Leo left on an errand, Ben walked down to the florist on the corner and bought one single stargazer lily, having the florist cut the stem to fit in the empty vase on Kate's desk, then tucked it in an empty doughnut bag.

He hand-calligraphied a card that said only, "I'm sorry. - B" then put the flower in her vase with some water and the card facing where she would sit. He left her office mere moments before Leo's return. Ben wasn't actually sure he had anything he needed to apologize for, but if there's one thing being around a lot of women had taught him, his sense of these things often disagreed with the opinions of the women involved.

#

Ben and Justin were muttering at each other when Judge Victoria Connors entered. She looked at the case file in front of her. "Ahh, San Francisco vs. Wozniak. I enjoyed his spectactular jump off the bridge yesterday. How far was that fall?"

Ben smiled and said, "Four hundred feet, he just skimmed the pavement." He gestured a long slide.

Judge said, "It's exhilarating." She looked at Justin. "What's the plea?"

Justin said, "Misdemeanor, 8 weeks in county."

Judge looked aghast. "Eight weeks! For a performance artist?"

Ben knew this was his cue that he should forget the plea deal and look out for the best interests of his client, and at the same time, he'd annoy Justin. That was just a bonus, though. "That's what I said, but some people have no appreciation of artistic expression," he turned to look at Justin, "it's called the . . . first . . . amendment?"

Justin responded, "Yeah, which courts interpreted as being subject to reasonable time, place, and manner restrictions. Bungee jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge is not reasonable."

Hell, bongo drumming on a street corner probably wasn't reasonable by Justin's standards. Ben replied, "But my client's art is about being unpredictable and unrestricted. If you take that away from him, you've taken away his constitutional rights."

Justin said, annoyed, "Can we just enter the plea that we agreed to and move on with this?"

The Judge said, "No no, this is good." She gestures at both attorneys. "You see, this is why the constitution is a living, a breathing, document."

Ben said, cheerily, "Absolutely. Wozniak broke the law, but, in doing so, he inspired our city with his artistic boldness. As I told ADA Patrick, jail time's way too punitive."

Justin, frustrated, growls, "But you agreed to a plea."

Ben shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "Well..."

Juge asks, "Okay. Well, do you have an agreement or not?"

Simultaneously, Justin said yes, and Ben said no.

The judge smiled, and she said, "Oh, gentlemen. Let's relish this debate. Before I accept any plea, I'd like you both to read New York City vs. Petit and we'll pick this up at lunch tomorrow in my chambers. That'll be all."

After Justin and Ben looked at each other in dawning horror, the judge said, "Next case!"

Ben walked out the door first, then Justin sped to catch up with him.

Justin said, Hey, hey, what are you doing? We had a deal."

Ben explained, "She didn't like it any more than I did." Was it really so hard for Justin to understand that Ben had to have his client's interests take priority, here? He owed it to his client to fight the good fight, even if it meant alienating ADA Snoozefest.

Justin said testily, "You know what I can't stand? People who waste my time."

Ben suddenly realized one of the reasons Ben and Kate hadn't gotten along. Kate was never going to win any awards for time efficiency except when it came to some aspects of her job, and the level of bitterness Justin expressed clearly had almost nothing to do with Ben. "Awww, maybe somebody's a little bit upset about getting beat in there."

"Actually, I just don't like you." Justin paused for effect before the next line. "Your own partners don't even like you."

So he didn't know anything about Kate's attempts to seduce Ben. Interesting. Ben stopped and turned around, then leaned on the coffee counter, smirking. "One does," Ben gloated.

Justin nodded. "Lauren tolerates you."

Ben continued smiling. "Always so sure of everything you're so sure of?"

"I'm sure you can't be trusted." Well, it's not like that was something that had come up today. Ben knew he had a reputation in certain respects and - he didn't care. The only reason he would care about what other people thought of him was if it affected his relationship with Kate.

Ben pulled a paper coffee cup off the counter, turned it right side up and placed it on the counter. "Cup for your tears. See you tomorrow." Ben turned and left.

Justin yelled after him, "You'd better bring your A game."

Ben smirked all the way to his car. So Justin really had no idea how his ex-wife felt. Fascinating.

#

The following morning, Kate was irritated at the repetitve sound from Ben's office. She looked up, only to see him throwing a small basketball at a backstop placed in front of the window leading to her office and Leo's.

She barged in his office. "What are you doing?"

"Workin' on my A game," he said without explanation. She picked up an amber ball he had on his desk, and he turned to look at her. His hair was a little more tousled than normal, and he was leaning back, jacket off, shirt sleeves rolled up, doing his best puppy dog cute look. "Justin says you don't like me. That's pretty ironic, don't you think?"

She smiled sweetly at him and pushed some stray hair back with her thumb. "Why is that ironic?"

"Well, I think that irony is something that makes the gods laugh, you know, like tornado destroys wind chime store." He looked down at her tossing the amber ball. "Gonna bludgeon me?"

"Probably. So, uh, what did you and Justin talk about?" And where the hell did Justin get the idea that Kate didn't like Ben? Seemed an odd thing for Justin to come up with right after she'd been seen leaving with him in a bar. How did that issue even come up, anyway?

"Well, I know it's hard for you to imagine we didn't spend all afternoon talking about you, but we didn't. It's about protecting the first amendment. And winning." Winning a case? Or winning her?

"Winning?" She asked.

"Mostly winning." Ben said, leaving Kate still wondering.

Leo came in to let her know a mediation client was in the office, and then he left to fetch Lauren.

Kate leaned over Ben's desk. "I mostly hate you," she said emphatically, slamming down the amber ball.

Ben smiled, then Kate left, rattled by the intrusion of the client and her imagination of what Justin and Ben might have said to each other.

She put her purse in her desk drawer , which is when she first saw the flower and the note. She put the note in a different desk drawer, sniffed the flower, and went to meet Lauren. Damn it, she'd been so rude to Ben right then and he'd been so sweet to leave the flower and note on her desk.

#

Later in the judge's chambers, Ben and Justin met with her for lunch. She didn't agree to either of their plea offers, but instead ordered them to dinner at her house, giving the address only to Ben.

"Is this even ethical?" Ben asked.

"Oh, like you care about ethics," Justin scoffed, then chided Ben to stick to the plea next time.

When the two men arrived for dinner, things got really strange and looked to be heading to even stranger territory with no end in sight for this case.

After they left the judge's house in the pouring rain, Ben and Justin were as confused as ever.

Ben said, "I thought you almost sealed the deal in there. Well played, counselor."

"I meant what I said."

"I have never met anyone who so fully believes in being by the book. It's mostly douchey, but it's kind of inspiring." Ben tried to find his keys, checking every pocket.

"Well thank you very much."

"Oh no. I left my keys in there." Ben looked back, as did Justin.

"Oh."

"I can't."

"I wouldn't."

"I have a spare set at the office."

"I'll call us both a cab."

"Yes."

They waited outside for the dab in awkward silence. They dropped Ben off first, and he slipped Justin more than enough money for the full cab ride, then entered his alarm code to enter the building.

When he arrived at his office, he saw Katie sleeping on the couch in his office. He quietly fetched his keys, then kneeled in front of Kate and removed her shoes.

She murmured. "Ben?"

"Yes, Katie, it's me."

"What are you doing here?"

"You're sleeping in my office."

Her eyes opened.

"It's okay if you sleep on my couch, but please take your shoes off first. It's a ten thousand dollar couch."

"Ten thousand dollars and you only got brown?"

"Well, it was another ten grand for the patent paisley print."

She laughed. "Oww."

"Are you in pain?"

"Headache."

"Ibuprofen?"

"Two?"

He went to fetch water and ibuprofen for her, then kneeled in front of her to hand them to her.

"Would you like a blanket?"

"Please."

He fetched the lightweight cashmere-blend blanket and pulled it over her.

"I'm going to let you sleep."

"I came in to apologize. Nice flower. So tired."

"Apology accepted."

"Thanks, honey."

"You're welcome, dear," he said with bemusement, and kissed her cheek just because. He ran his fingers through her hair gently, which made her murmur happily, and he said, "Good luck with Mean Girls Prep. Sleep well."

"Okay."

He left her in his office, turning off more lights so she'd sleep better, then called a cab to go fetch his car. The entire way, he was chuckling over her tender use of the endearment she'd used and how fervently she'd said she mostly hated him earlier in the day.

#

That night, Kate woke several times from bad dreams about her current case, but Ben was gone. At one point, she realized she'd called him honey and he'd called her dear back. Well, that was far less embarrassing than propositioning him and calling him empty, wasn't it?

#

The next morning, Ben arrived before even Leo, and Kate was still asleep in Ben's office. He waited outside the ladies' room for Lauren, then asked her why the judge would drag out the plea bargain. Her answers led to a plan, which he sprang on Justin later that morning.

Just before Judge Connors entered the courtroom, Ben said to Justin, "Stick to the plan."

Justin asked, "This isn't a trap, right?"

Ben said, "This is the only way out of this, scout's honor."

For once, Justin didn't say anything snarky to Ben.

After the judge approved their new and improved plea deal, Ben burst from the courtroom. "Ohh, I thought this would never end."

"Let's not do this again."

"Agreed."

They parted awkwardly, and Ben took the rest of the day off just out of sheer frustration.

Later, he got a text from Katie about her case. "Mean Girl & Preppy Teacher: $0. Mean Girls Prep: won. New client: Mean Girls Prep."

Ben texted back: "You go, tiger!"

Only belatedly did he realize that her referring to her alma mater as Mean Girls Prep meant she remembered at least some of last night's conversation.


	3. Chapter 3: Ripple of Hope

**a/n: M content won't happen for a few more chapters, but there is a one-paragraph allusion to it in this chapter.**

**In case anyone's interested in the actual case Leo cites, it's a real case, but the title was shortened in the episode. Full title is Community for Creative Non-Violence vs. Reid,** 490 U.S. 730 (1989)

**Chapter 3**

**Ripple of Hope**

Kate ran for the elevator with two cups of coffee, and Ben kept the door from shutting on her.

"Ahh," She said. "Thanks." She smiled her biggest smile at him then sidled up next to him as the courier slid around her to the middle of the elevator.

"You're welcome," he said sexily, smiling at her. He turned to look forward, slight smile on his face as Kate moved to the music and began humming to "Hallelujah."

Someone hummed along with her and Ben turned to the woman and said, "Do not encourage her." Several people chuckled at him.

Kate turned to Ben to sing at him, and he gave her a serious look of longing that melted her heart, then another person in the car joined in and Kate turned to look at her.

Then everyone else joined in, much to Kate's amusement, with Ben finally conceding to enjoy himself along with the rest of them. When she noticed he was singing, she jumped up and down, and a huge grin swept across his face.

He stopped singing when he left the elevator, but she kept going and said, "Bye guys!"

That was good morning, Kate Reed style.

#

After leaving the elevator, Ben overheard why Kate brought two coffees. She needed an apartment. Oh, this could be fun. His mind started doing cartwheels while he checked his voicemail and found the latest case dropped in his lap - one he could work on with Kate.

Ben walked into Kate's office, managed to offend Leo, who was trying to sell Kate on taking his girlfriend Ashley's case, then re-started his conversation with Kate. "As I was saying, someone at the Attorney General's office saw a law journal piece about my buying into the firm, and it mentioned dispute resolution. Meaning you."

Kate said, "And you're upset because it wasn't all about you?"

Ben snorted at the implication. "Over the weekend, inmates at the Hayward Women's Prison went on a hunger strike to dispute living conditions, and they want a non-violent resolution."

"And since when do you care about prisoners' rights?"

"When it means that a Deputy Attorney General owes us a favor. Not to mention it makes us look like Nelson Mandela. We get money and glory." Ben walked to the door, then turned around gracefully, like an experienced dancer, then pointed at Kate. "The downside is you may get taken hostage."

"I can take 'em," Kate said gamely.

"Definitely if they don't eat for a few more days, but if you do screw up and I have to go in after you," he gestured with his hands, "I'll be like the only man on Amazon Island."

The image amused her. "And then they could eat you. Problem solved. Game on."

He tilted his head at her, then spun gracefully and left the room, leaving her wondering about his dance moves. Once again, she was left imagining what he'd be like holding her close, moving with her, but this time her imagination was all about dancing in his arms in some darkened room, not being able to see the other dancers because he held her captive with his soft brown eyes.

#

"You wanna know how Justin and I get along when we had to work together?" No, that was one thing Kate definitely did not want to know.

"No."

"You two seem like an unlikely couple. Most marriages fail because of a lack of chemistry." Oh dear God, this was not the time.

"No, most marriages fail because people aren't _nice_ to each other. And you know what? Justin and I had _plenty_ of chemistry," she said defensively.

"Oh, no, no, I don't mean sex. I mean what happens in the first ten seconds when you meet someone and your crocodile brain kicks in. Can this guy bring dinner home? Do I want his genes in my offspring?"

Kate had never given Ben the _slightest_ hint of why she'd propositioned him that first night then said "too late" so quickly, but he was hitting pretty close to home. Aside from the ill-fated pregnancy scare, she'd never imagined being pregnant with Justin's child. She imagined having a several-year-old child that seemed to have been Justin's - but not the process that got them there.

After Kate had said, _Just be who you are and take me_, she'd had a flood of images of what sex with Ben would be like. In the first image, she was married to Ben, pregnant with his child, and he was chasing her around the living room, both of them laughing, and he would ravish her any moment now.

Kate lied, "No, I don't think like that. Ever."

Ben pressed, "So you ignored your instincts but married him anyway."

Kate said, exasperated, "You know what, being taken hostage sounds really good right about now."

After a split-second delay, Ben shifted tactics. "Maybe you're rebelling. Did you marry Justin to piss your father off?"

"No, no, no, my dad adored Justin."

"Oh, so that's why you married him."

Enough with the marriage talk. "You know, people get killed every day in prisons."

Then the warden showed up and Kate was spared any further probing into her marital habits, thank God. She did, however, still have the image of Ben ready to pounce still stuck in her head.

#

Much later, Kate tried to clear a retrial effort for Lea Farran with Lauren, and Lauren pulled Ben in, exactly what Kate didn't want.

Lauren said, "Kate, I appreciate that you want to help this woman, I even admire it a little."

"But, you can't tilt at every windmill," Ben said, pissing Kate off into an extended rant.

"I don't want to save the whole world," Kate said, storming out, shoulder checking Ben as she passed. "I want to save her."

"Big fancy exit," Ben whispered to Lauren.

"Oh shut up!" Kate yelled back.

#

A few minutes later, Ben walked up to the roof, frustrated by today's turn of events. He found Kate standing out there, no jacket or scarf, just her thin purple blouse unbuttoned low enough to be intriguing, much like her similar blue blouse had been before the inattentional blindness demonstration. Her arms were crossed in a failed attempt to stay warm.

He pulled a tissue out of his jacket pocket and folded it in his hand in case he needed to give it to her.

She didn't say anything as he approached, but accepted the warmth of his jacket when he removed it and put it around her shoulders, her fingers pulling it tighter around her without uncrossing her arms.

He didn't try to start any conversation with her, just stood there with her, and when he saw she was crying, he handed her the tissue.

When she leaned into him for warmth and comfort, he knew what he needed to do. _Do everything and say nothing._ He had some strings to pull and thought about how to accomplish that before morning.

"C'mon, Katie," he finally said. "You're shivering, and the hunger strikers need you to be healthier than they are. You really look like you could use a bubble bath. Lauren have a bathtub for you?"

Kate nodded.

She followed him to the stairs. When they stepped inside, she handed Ben his jacket, whispered thanks, and left the office without saying another word.

Ben's emotions did a weird double backflip. He'd never cared so much about disappointing another person in his life. He read everything on Kate's desk pertaining to the case. Not having been there for some of the negotiations, he only had filtered information, but he could at least put a motion together before morning.

Ben headed home to finish up more comfortably, stripping down to boxers, a mug of spiked mulled cider, and a pot pie he'd made earlier in the week. By midnight, he had a completed motion and a hearing scheudled for the following morning.

As his head landed on the pillow, he thought of Kate's line from their first meeting. _And you're a fixer_, she'd said after he'd said, _You seem broken. I like that._

He wasn't becoming a fixer, was he?

No, no, he was trying to fix something she was upset about, not her. Normally someone who fell asleep in a few minutes, it took Ben over an hour to fall asleep because all he could think about were the looks on Kate's face that day. His fault, of course, as he'd invited her into the whole mess, but he knew she'd do much better at negotiating the hunger strike than he would.

#

Justin saw Kate running toward him the next morning. "You're here early," he said.

"Lea's parole hearing is Thursday. . . what do I do?"

Annoyed, Justin said, "You could try, 'good morning, Justin, it's nice to see you.'"

Kate said, trying not to be annoyed at him, "Good morning, Justin, it's nice to see you."

Kate re-started her spiel. "Lea's parole hearing is Thursday. . . what do I do?"

"Wait, besides what you're already doing?" He turned to face her.

Kate pleaded with him. "Justin, you're my last hope."

Justin smiled in bemusement. "You don't know what's happening?"

"What?" She really didn't seem to know.

"The motion, before judge Becker, to re-open the Farran case. Reed and Reed must have pulled some strings to get on his calendar that fast."

"What?"

"In fact, he's probably hearing it right now."

Justin said, puzzled, "You didn't know about this?"

"Thank you!" she yelled as she ran toward the courtroom.

Justin stood there for a moment, wondering. He was curious enough about how it happened without her knowing that he walked to the courthouse himself out of sheer morbid curiosity.

Justin slipped in while Grogan was arguing his motion. He should have figured. Kate's smile as she looked at Grogan was heartbreaking, and Grogan kept looking back at Kate.

Justin looked between the two of them. Despite Kate saying they weren't involved the day before and that she wasn't dating, it was clear to Justin who she would be dating when she started again, if she hadn't already. Justin had never seen her look that way before.

Grogan's line from their last case together came back to haunt Justin, _Always so sure of everything you're so sure of?_ Justin had essentially said Kate couldn't stand Grogan just to rattle him, but it was clear from Kate's hero worship of Grogan that Justin was very, very wrong about that. Worse, Grogan knew it.

Justin was almost amused by the judge shutting down Grogan until he saw the wounded look on Kate's face. He headed back to his office before he saw her fawn all over Ben.

#

As they left the courtroom, Ben asked, "Still in your good mood?"

"Ben, I am grateful." She put her hand on his back. "Lea would be grateful. You said it was hopeless, but you did it anyway." She removed her hand and smiled at him.

"I would never do anything that I thought was hopeless. I thought I could win." He kept a couple of steps ahead of her so she couldn't see his disappointed expression.

"Oh, is it that simple for you?"

"Yeah. You put the 'goods' in one column, the 'bads' in the other. Then you pick a winner." He ordered coffe for both of them. "Ben Franklin called it 'moral algebra.'"

"Did you just compare yourself to Benjamin Franklin?"

"I read every word that he wrote at St. Augustine's, and, French prostitutes aside, he never let his emotions muck around with his decisions."

"So, you never do anything. . . impulsively. It's just because you have to?"

"No, I never have to do anything." Which was true. He'd made sure he had enough money to walk away from everything if he chose to. He could live comfortably for the rest of his life without ever bringing in another dime.

"You know what, you are so full of it. I saw you in there, and you did care." He was in a bad mood from losing, and her pressing the point was pissing him off because she clearly had no clue _why_ he cared. He didn't care about the case at all, and his _Do everything and say nothing_ effort was clearly going to hell.

"You know what I wish?"

"I bet you're gonna tell me anyway." She smiled.

"When I use the word 'fairness' in a courtroom, it's because it's the best way to get to a bleeding-heart judge. It's not because I believe in fairness or doing the right thing or being on the right side of anything. I wish that, just for a moment, you could imagine that I'm not even a little bit like you." As he talked, the smile on her face turned into sadness.

"Wish granted."

She walked away and he swallowed hard, realizing how much of a jackass he'd been to her just then. He shouldn't have taken his loss out on her; it wasn't her fault. He walked off in a different direction so he didn't have to face her again right now. He'd done enough damage.

#

Kate wound up in Justin's office again, and Justin handed her the DA file on Lea Farran and asked her to sign it out.

"Justin, five seconds ago, I couldn't even admit I had this in my hand," Kate said. "Why are you doing this?"

"Lea's not gonna get another trial, so this is it. The parole board is the only chance to get that evidence heard. So between that and your bottomless charm. . . ." Not to mention Justin's desire to one-up Grogan. . . .

Kate beamed at him and kissed his cheek, then left.

Who's your hero now, Kate?

#

Ashley had said to Leo about XX-Chromo: "It was always a valuable thing. To me." Despite Ashley's complete inability to fight for herself, it gave Leo the courage to go the extra mile for her after they'd hammered out a deal he could see she wasn't thrilled about.

When Lauren came in because the other party complained about Leo, Leo said, "The deal stinks."

Lauren replied, "Leo, I let you run with this, but it is time to stop running. We do not want to test this in court. Now. . . you need to stop playing lawyer and let me be the lawyer."

"Lauren, they're a big company."

"We do not want to kill this deal."

"They're not just big, they're huge. They have a dozen lawyers who do nothing all day but find ways to keep people from getting money out of them. They grind you down. That's how they win. So if they can do that, why are they so eager to come over here and settle this so fast?"

"Ugh, it is annoying to me that you have a point."

"What would you do, Lauren, if you knew you could not fail?"

"What?"

"It's XX-Chromo's motto."

Ashley came out to talk to Lauren and Leo. "I just got a text. It's a comic-con blog. Wonderbomb's in talks to sell movie rights for XX-Chromo."

Lauren smiled and said, "What would you do, Leo, if you knew you could not fail?"

"Make a crapload of money?"

Lauren gestured back to the conference room. "After you."

#

Ben offered to drive Kate to the Hayward correctional facility for Lea Farran's parole hearing.

As they left the car, Kate said, "You know, I'm really surprised you came with me." She shouldn't have been. "Somebody told me, and, uh, it's a vague memory..."

Ben said sheepishly, "Yeah."

"That I have a habit of tilting at windmills."

"Tilting at windmills is a lot more interesting than, I don't know, whatever it is normal people tilt at." So help him, he was becoming interested in her pet hobby.

"Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Do you think we have a prayer of getting her out?"

"I miss when this was about broccoli."

Kate's phone rang, and she read her text message. She smiled. "Oh, hold on. Dale Rence, the professor whose wife was killed in the robbery, called to say he's not coming today."

Despite himself, Ben smiled. "What did you do?"

"I just fed him some B.S. about truth and honesty," Kate winked at Ben, "'cause that's how I roll." They turned to walk into the prison, Kate putting her arm into the crook of Ben's.

Ben waited outside the hearing room, but tried to urge Lea to take a winning strategy that would get her out sooner by lying. After Kate got shut out in the parole hearing, Ben sat next to her until she couldn't sit there any more waiting for results.

As they walked out to the car, Ben got a call. He got into the car where Kate was already in the passenger seat, then said, "Denied. The Attorney General Office found money for a prison garden program. It's gonna be state-wide."

She turned her head away from him, but not before he saw that she was crying. Ben reached out for her hand, holding it gently yet firmly, and she squeezed his hand lightly and held it.

With his still-free hand, he reached into the glove box and brought out a couple of tissues, then turned her head gently to face him. He daubed the tears off her cheeks.

"Katie, the world needs more people like you."

This made her sob, so she grabbed the tissues with her free hand, then looked away. She clung tightly to Ben's hand, so he started the car and drove to their office, her hand in his the entire time.

#

After Ben got back and heard about Leo's exploits, he sat on the corner of Leo's desk.

"I hear you brought in more coin than I did today."

"I did a lot of research for Ashley, and she got a good deal."

"You know what makes my world go 'round?"

"I'm sure you'll tell me."

"Hot women bringing in coin. You totally rocked it for your girlfriend, Leo." Ben offered a fistbump, and Leo returned the gesture.

#

Ben had stayed late until everyone but Kate had left, then walked into Kate's office to see if she wanted dinner. As he stepped into her office, the phone rang and she looked at him while she was talking.

She smiled. "The hunger strike is over. All the women are eating, including Lea Farran." Maybe it was too soon for dinner. They walked to the elevator together, making small talk, but she forgot her phone.

As she left the elevator, she said, "You know what? Thank you so much for everything." Ben nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow."

He needed to feel her touch, this woman who'd turned his last twenty-four hours upside-down.

As she started to turn, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her back toward him. She ran right up against his body, and he smiled and leaned in with a protective, exploratory smile. He kissed her firmly, and she leaned back a little, but then pulled her other hand out from between them, hand pausing on his lapel, then sliding her hand behind his head, deepening the kiss and sending thrills down his body.

Their mouths opened, and she completely opened to him, returning his gentle tongue exploration with her own, running her hand across his face, then cupping his chin while she returned his kiss with abandon.

She pushed him away and they stared at each other, mouths open in shock, for several seconds.

Not sure how to read her expression, he said, "I'm sorry, I had to do that."

"Have a good . . . tire . . . thing," she said awkwardly.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

He said, "Good night."

She replied, "Good night."

He said "Good night," backed into the elevator, saluted her, then said, "Good night," one last time.

"Good night." She said.

Really? He'd never apologized for kissing anyone before. Well, except Alessandra, but that was more than a kiss. Nor did he usually say "good night" three times. Awkward!

All the way to the car place, he thought of nothing else. He found himself absent-mindedly running his fingers over his lips through the rest of the night, wondering what might have happened if he hadn't let her rattle him so. And yet, being rattled is exactly what he liked about her: never knowing what would come next.

Why the hell hadn't he waited for her to get her phone? Maybe it'd have gotten less awkward if he had. Then again, maybe it'd have gotten worse.


	4. Chapter 4: Kiss Me, Kate

**[a/n: Well, I kinda sort lied (hope you'll forgive me, heh) about when the M-ish stuff would start, partly because I rewote one scene. No sex scene per se, though. Those with peanut allergies may wish to take their meds before reading this chapter. :) ]**

Kate didn't dare leave the office after that kiss. She'd go looking for Ben, and spend the night with him with some amazing sex she'd probably regret in the morning.

She'd instead called about some piece of equipment she'd been having trouble with and been putting off calling about, and the phone was answered by Joe in India. He sounded so nice - and supportive.

"Joe. . . . Did you ever do anything stupid?"

"Umm, sorry?"

"Like. . . your life is just about to make . . . a little bit of sense, and then something so. . . something so weird happens. You just kinda wonder if it ever even happened at all."

"Umm, sorry for your troubles, Beth."

"Well, I'm not Beth. You're not Joe. We're probably never gonna meet, so . . .." She squinted. "I kissed somebody I work with." Kate opened her eyes and leaned back. "And he is an idiot. But not like the stupid kind, just like . . . . Oh, I don't know. He's just like the idiot kind. Joe, he's a mystery. He's India to me."

"India is a good country."

She chuckled. "I'm sure it is."

She described Ben's kiss to Joe as "decent," but that was anything but the truth. The kiss was deeply indecent in the best of ways: its eroticism promised hot nights, clothes off, pent-up feelings explored.

"Is it really so terrible being alone?" She asked Joe.

"Are you serious?" Joe sounded like he had an unrequited crush on a coworker. Then again, Kate realized, so did she.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay."

When she finally did go home, Joe's advice and Ben's kiss swirled together in her mind, wondering how long Ben had really been alone. To her question about whether it was so terrible to be alone, he was the one saying, "Are you serious?"

The last few years, she'd had Justin, and the weird thing was, she felt less alone now that she was actually alone than much of the time she'd spent with Justin.

Those few seconds, her lips pressed together with Ben's, she didn't feel alone at all. The feeling was so alien, she really didn't know how to cope with it, especially after her mother's death, Justin filing for divorce, her father's death, and the cool, uneasy relationship she and Lauren had. Then Ben just steps into her space the way she stepped into others' spaces, and she'd never had anyone do that before.

She hugged her pillow all night long, her lips still tingling.

#

The next morning, Kate was late to Judge Nicastro's courtroom, and she was seriously stressed about it because he'd once had her handcuffed to a bench. She stepped out of the elevator and heard a familiar voice talking.

Ben.

Without thinking, she stepped back into the elevator. She couldn't deal with Ben right now.

Crap.

She faked talking on the phone to someone, and left the elevator, passing casually by Ben. Naturally, she'd forgotten to turn her ringer off, so someone called just then, and Ben called her on it.

"Maybe you should answer that," he said, followed by, "Do you want to have dinner tonight?"

"Dinner," she said heavily.

"Yeah." He raised his eyebrows.

She stammered excuses.

"Call me. Or, you know, pretend to call me, and let me know what you said."

Kate backed out of the encounter, now even later for Nicastro.

After a shouting match with the parties in Nicastro's mediation, Kate dropped by her office.

#

Kate and Leo stood in Leo's office talking about his new bike when Kate saw Ben and retreated to her office suddenly. Ben walked to his office.

Kate confided in Leo. "And . . . I . . . kissed somebody."

Leo said, "Okay. I'm not your girlfriend."

"Mm-hmm."

"All I ask is, you know, some kinda boundary between this and a . . . slumber party. Who was it?"

"Oh, you don't know him." After Leo started smiling, Kate added, "Don't! Don't you say anything!" She slapped his stomach.

"What . . ."

"Nothing!" She started walking out of her office.

"Oh, okay, I see. So I'm more like your relationship with your pillow. You can just drool on me, throw me on the floor."

Kate walked quickly by Ben's office only to run into Ben coming around the corner.

"Hi," he said.

"Hey." She felt awkward.

"Think about dinner?"

"Dinner." She'd hardly been thinking of anything but. Her stomach was so tied up in knots, she doubted she could eat anything.

"Yeah, food, accompanied by discussion. Exempli gratia: Lauren filled me in on your union mediation. We could talk about that."

"Yeah, yeah. Well, you know what? It's just been a crazy day."

"Oh, crazy days. Okay, it's just dinner."

Lauren interrupted, and Kate used the opportunity to weasel out of talking to Ben.

#

Later, after Nicastro was arrested for hitting someone, Kate was waiting by the elevator and Ben walked up.

He asked, "So . . . did Castro really deck some guy on the picket line?" Kate turned to look at him, so obviously relieved to see him, it almost made him ache.

"This is your field, right?"

"Yeah. Every time a judge pops the top off someone, I'm your guy." She held his wrists with her hands, as she often did when she wanted something.

"Okay, so what happens next?" Kate backed off a bit so they were back to normal conversational distance.

Ben thought for a moment. "Well, you were there. You think he felt a legitimate physical threat to himself or to you . . . self-defense?"

"The guy was threatening, but he wasn't . . . really a threat."

"Castro willing to lie?"

"Not him."

"Well, judges tend to go hard on other judges. So if he's found guilty, he'll probably lose his seat on the bench. Go to prison. Minimum security. Two years tops."

"Oh!"

"Want some company?" Ben asked hopefully.

"Oh, no, no. No, no."

She rushed through the next sentence in what was obviously a moment of bravery. "Tonight, 7:00 P.M. Pick a place!"

As the elevator was closing, he said, "It's a date!" then realized his error.

"It's not a date," he added hastily as the elevator closed.

He could tell he scared her.

#

Kate made it to Nicastro's hearing in time to keep him from pleading guilty. She talked him into accepting her as his attorney then urged him to plead no contest, which he did. Then she talked to him about issuing an order designed to help stop the pending transit strike in her mediation he'd assigned her.

She gave Nicastro a pep talk about what she needed from him that was as much of a pep talk about what courage she needed as anything else. "Now, sir, I have go this date toni . . . no, a dinner. A date . . . a dinner. Well, it's a . . . I don't know what it is, but I'm not trying to compare my love life to a transit strike, but . . . all I'm saying is that moving either one of these things forward means doing something that is completely terrifying. So just issue the order. And, yes, you would be doing exactly what he wants. But . . . sometimes . . . our instincts need to be ignored. Issue the order."

Nicastro did, bolstering Kate's spirits about her own new life adventures.

#

After getting the order from Nicastro, Kate called Leo. "Okay, so I'm on my way to see Hayward and serve the order, and then I have to buy a new dress. I have a seven p.m. business dinner."

Leo said, doubtfully, "Why wouldn't you wear your business clothes to a business dinner?"

"Uh, because it's a none-of-your-business . . . dinner."

Leo suggested, "You want me to push it back a half hour? Give you some wiggle room? His contact number is . . . ."

"Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no. I'm gonna text him myself."

Kate hung up with Leo.

Moments later, Ben and Lauren conversed in Leo's office.

"Ben. Great. There you are. Can you take a look at this certificate of authenticity that came with the painting?"

Ben responded, "As much as the implied contractual warranties of modern art electrify me, I have a seven o'clock dinner." An incoming text message alert sounded. "Oh. Dinner just got pushed back half an hour. Have your way with me."

Lauren said, "Great."

Realizing who Kate was having dinner with, and who she probably kissed, Leo said the only word that could possibly come to mind. "Zoinks."

#

Kate hadn't had to buy a dress for a specific occasion in so long, she was kind of at a loss as to what to buy or where she should go. Kate went to her favorite place to window shop. Their style was more progressive than what Justin liked, even though Kate adored the freshness.

It was really the first time she'd felt freer because she wasn't with Justin. She could buy whatever she wanted and not having him nag her about her choices. Lauren didn't have to put up with this dress, and God knows Ben would like almost anything with taste.

She walked around, picking out four dresses including one that was way too body conscious for a first date where one wasn't out clubbing looking for a one-night stand.

After she'd spent 15 minutes looking, the clerk finally said, "Need some help deciding?"

"Yeah. Recently divorced, going on a first date post-divorce tonight."

"You go, girl!" the clerk said. "You've come to the right place. Where are you going?"

"Someplace exceedingly nice and expensive. His choice."

"Oh, my. Man's got taste?" Kate nodded. "This one," she pointed to the body conscious yellow dress, "is not that kind of dress, though I bet you'd look stunning in it. Let's see them all on."

She tried them on, and the white one fit her better of the three "first date" dresses.

"Let's see the other," the clerk said.

"Oh, it's not a dress for tonight."

"You're clinging on to it for dear life. Least you could do is try it on."

"Fine. But I want an honest answer about how I look in it."

She went into the dressing room, slid into the hot yellow dress, and tried to imagine Ben's reaction. It'd probably be something like when she was teasing him senseless, only this time, she'd intend a payoff.

"Well here goes nothing," she said, looking at the dress on her lean form while her thoughts turned to far more adult scenarios. She opened the dressing room door.

"So?" Kate asked.

"Hot," the clerk said. "Bangin' hot."

A female customer chimed in, "Hell, I'd do you, and I'm straight."

"It seems a lot of money for something that's going to wind up on the bedroom floor pretty quickly," Kate said.

"If you make all the way to the bedroom, I'll give you ten percent off your next purchase," the clerk said with a smirk.

"I don't know. . . ." Kate said, trying to think of reasons not to buy it and failing.

"Oh, honey, you're recently divorced. You need a 'fuck me hard' dress."

Another clerk laughed and said, "Don't we all?"

Kate left the store with two dresses, wearing the new white one, then called Ben.

Kate asked, "So, where'd you pick?"

"Stratton's."

"Stratton's? Uhh, okay. That's nice."

"I like nice things," he purred into the phone.

"I know. I _know_ you do." She smiled, thinking of her secret weapon: the yellow dress.

"Oh, man, could I use a drink." Too much yelling in the mediation case had given her a headache.

"Well, that could be arranged. Seven thirty, don't be late."

"Okay, all right, I've just got one more stop, it should only take a few minutes."

When she hung up, her stomach was tied up in knots from fear.

#

Justin opened the door to his apartment.

Kate said, "Hi" and barged in.

Justin asked, "What's the occasion? Hey, how's Nicastro?"

"A mess."

"Look, I need to do an end run around the BCM director and get to his books."

"No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. I just ordered food. Opened a bottle of wine. I have a stack of briefs I have to get through. I can't."

"Justin, please. Please. Just look at this court order for me, please. It'll only take a second." She brought his wine and food to the table, then started to unbutton her coat.

Justin looked up at her and noticed her dress. "What, are you going on a date?"

"Nope. I just, um, have this business dinner-meeting thing." She smiled off into the distance. That was stupid, letting Justin see her new dress.

A few minutes later, Kate opened one of Justin's fortune cookies. "Fear is your greatest enemy."

Kate told Justin what she needs from him: support to get the order executed before federal court opens, so she'll have the documents in hand for Nicastro's mediation before it can be stopped, and she and Justin argue about it.

#

Kate's phone rings, and Leo, working late, answers. "Kate's desk!"

Ben, from Stratton's says, "Leonardo, you got Kate for me?"

"She's not at her desk. Can I do something for you?"

"Just . . . just tell her to give me a call."

Leo says, "Will do."

His look turns solemn. Kate had better not be blowing this up. Reed and Reed needed Ben to stay afloat. Things were starting to get scary before he came on board.

#

Meanwhile, Kate and Justin are still arguing over Kate's idea when Leo calls her.

"Ah. What?" She answers.

"Hey! How's your business dinner-date?"

"Um . . . It's fine."

"Are you on it?"

Justin interrupts. "Is that Leo? What's up, Leo?"

Kate said, "Yeah."

"Is that Justin? He's not your date."

She asked, "How would you know?"

"I don't."

"Hey, remember your boat?"

"Leonardo."

"You know how you have a tendency to blow things up you really shouldn't?"

"Okay, did you call for a reason, girlfriend?"

"Okay, buh-bye."

"I am an employee. Going to leave my place of employment, and I'm going to go home to my life, because this is my job, not my life."

Leo was really, really pissed off at Kate.

#

Justin finally gives into Kate's pleas. "Okay, I'll do it. First thing tomorrow morning."

"Oh, you promise?"

"I promise."

"Oh, thank you, thank you!"

"Now, you gotta go."

"Mm-hmm, okay."

"You gotta get out of here. I got things to do."

"Okay, okay." A text message came in on Kate's phone, stopping her cold. It's eight-fifty, and she's an hour and twenty minutes late for Stratton's. Ben's text says, simply, "It's just dinner, Katie."

Justin grabs her coat but she keeps her back turned to him. "Here." She's being evasive as she's sending a text message. "You okay?"

The text Ben reads says, "Sorry...I'm not going to make it."

Kate throws her shoes and phone down and turns to kiss Justin.

#

Ben's heart dropped when he saw her response saying she couldn't make it. He ordered dinner finally, but he couldn't enjoy it. The headwaiter, seeing his fallen face, sent a drink over on the house; Ben had spent enough here over the years to earn that small privilege.

By the time he finished, he had grown concerned. Was she really mad at him? It seemed better not to let things wait until morning. Always settle them that day if possible, that way everyone can get a good night's sleep and start the day fresh.

Ben found himself back in front of the office, parked his car, and headed on up. No Kate, not even curled up on the couch in his office. Damn. He checked every floor, every office of the building, including the roof.

He drove to Lauren's, swallowed his pride, and knocked on the glass door.

Lauren answered, hair down, looking elegant even in workout clothes. "Ben."

Best to be direct. "Is Kate here?"

Lauren tilted her head. "I haven't seen her since she left the office mid-afternoon."

"Thank you. I, uh, had some thoughts about the case she was working on."

"Let me check."

Embarrassed, he said, "It can wait until morning."

Lauren shook her head. "It's okay. She needs to work with you."

Two minutes later, Lauren came back with the news. "Sorry."

Ben walked back to his car. Secretly, he'd hoped she was at home working on a case and had just chickened out, because some of the other options were far worse. Unfortunately, that now grew much likelier. Why couldn't he have left it alone?

Kate wouldn't confide in Lauren, at least not based on what Ben had seen of the two of their interactions. No, so far as Ben knew, Kate only had one confidant: Leo. With even more dread than going to Lauren's, Ben drove to Leo's place. By that time, it was after eleven, but he couldn't immediately bring himself to drop in on Leo. Instead, he walked by, saw the light was on, then walked down the street further to the nearest bar. He'd had two drinks earlier, then dinner, and that had been a couple of hours ago. Ben needed to steel himself up for an answer he might not want to hear, so he entered the bar, had a second Plymouth & tonic, then wandered around for almost an hour before going to Leo's again.

He knocked on Leo's door.

"Where is she?"

"Hello?"

Ben knew Leo was deflecting when he said she was at BCM.

"She has a lousy sense of time - and so do you."

"She's not at work, she's not sleeping at Lauren's-"

"You went to Lauren's?" Leo straightened up a bit with respect.

Yes, he'd outed himself to Leo, and that was probably a mistake, but Ben had to know she was okay. "You can cover for her all night, but you know me well enough by now." He paused. "Man to man - the truth."

Leo walked away, then turned away, then the word Ben didn't want to hear came out: Justin. Suddenly, the flip comment he'd made in the bar that first night didn't seem so clever. Let's hope Justin didn't change his mind for good.

Ben got in his car, put on Joan Jett's "I hate myself for loving you" at full volume and drove home.

#

The next day, Kate had lunch with Nicastro after she'd gotten the strike called off and had gotten the truth for all parties.

Judge Nicastro said, "You're very good at what you do, Ms. Reed. But . . . you've never been about the words."

"Well, then what am I about?"

"You're here at the very moment that I did not want to be alone."

"Oh . . . you're not going to jail."

"That's nice." The judge smiled.

#

The following day, Ben made himself scarce, though he casually strolled by Kate's office as he was leaving.

She ran after him. Excellent.

"I haven't really seen you around much today," she said.

He complimented her on her work to reinforce his admiration of her, knowing how much it was her calling. She tried to apologize, but he knew she wasn't being honest, so he waited for an awkward moment, then turned away.

She pursued him again, urging him to wait several times. He paused, then turned toward her again. "I still want to reschedule," she said, then clarified, "our dinner."

Ben played it casual, "Oh yeah. Cool. Whenever. G'night."

He walked into the elevator, waited for the door to shut, then let out his breath. That was the hardest thing he'd done in weeks, pretending not to care. Still, it had worked. She had come to him twice. Let's just hope it was enough to make up for the gaffe of seeming over-enthusiastic.

#

After Ben left, Leo said, "Boom!" as Kate threw up her hands.

"Kate," Leo said. "I don't ask much of you, but please go fix this so I don't have to see it again tomorrow."

"Fine," she said, "though I have no idea where he's going."

"He's going to a bar, Kate. He's going to get drunk. Probably like he did last night."

"He told you that?"

"He didn't have to. Call him, find him, at least try to fix things."

She put on her jacket and ran down the stairs. Ben sat in his Aston Martin staring out the front window before starting the car. She tapped on the passenger side glass. He looked at her, then got out of the car and let her in, sitting back down before either of them spoke.

She said, "You look like you could use a drink more than I could yesterday."

"Yeah."

"I'll buy," she suggested, feeling guilty for abandoning him.

"I'm not in the mood for Stratton's tonight. Another time. Got a different suggestion?"

"How about a nice dark dive bar, then? One that's not too loud."

"Works for me. I'll buy, Katie. Thanks for the offer."

He started the car, and, a few minutes later, they were in a part of the Sunset district she didn't know. He found a place to park. As they started walking, he offered the crook of his arm, which she took.

They found a small L-shaped booth with graffiti-carved wooden tables in the darkest corner of the place, and Ben ordered one of the microbrews they had on tap.

Kate ordered a beer and a burger, and was worried when Ben didn't order any food, so she ordered peanuts for the two of them. Local bar custom said to throw the shells on the floor.

He accepted peanuts only when she offered them, but refused to take a bite of her burger. About the tenth peanut, he got playful and leaned his head back and opened his mouth for her to put the peanut in. After she did, he smiled at her for the first time all day. She laughed, and put a peanut between her lips, then offered it to him. He leaned in and carefully plucked it out of her lips with his own, brushing her lips for the briefest of moments.

The next peanut she again offered with her fingers. Ben looked disappointed, but ate it anyway. Every third or fourth she'd offer with her lips, and each time the contact got slightly longer.

Then, for the first time, he picked up a peanut and put it in his lips. She swung her knees over his thighs, getting into a more comfortable position, then leaned in slowly to fetch the peanut. She fumbled the catch and the peanut escaped into the deep vee of her low-cut gold blouse. She stared down into her cleavage, and so did he.

He looked at her, tilting his head and raising an eyebrow in challenge. She fetched the peanut before Ben could. He plucked it from her fingers and placed it in the pocket with his pocket square. She reached for his pocket, but he said, sternly, "Mine," and cracked another peanut shell, placed a peanut between his lips, and let her try again. She teased his lips with hers, then successfully extracted the peanut.

When she picked up the next peanut, Ben dropped his hand to stroke her calf, then realized what he'd done, removed his hand, and apologized.

"Put your hand back," she said. He did so, more tentatively this time, then looked at her, eyes smouldering. She caressed his cheek with her fingers, and traced his lips with her index finger alone.

She sipped her beer before continuing with the peanut torment and Clandestine Feeding of Ben, then cracked open a few more peanuts, tossing the shells to the ground.

They continued playing peanut games, but Ben stole the last peanut.

"Hey!" she said.

He placed it on his tongue and winked at her, holding his tongue slightly out to taunt her. She opened her mouth to him, stealing back the peanut with a flick of her tongue. He chuckled at her victorious look.

No longer distracted by food, she realized how awkward they must look, two well-dressed lawyers in expensive clothes literally curled up in a corner of a dive bar. She began to feel self-conscious, especially with Ben's hand slowly stroking her calf.

"Are you ready?" he asked after paying the tab.

"Sure," she said, sad that this time was ending. She pulled her legs down from his thighs, then shook them out a bit to revive the circulation in her lower legs.

"I'll take you home, then."

They walked down the street arm-in-arm, then he drove her to Lauren's and walked her to the door.

"Thank you for indulging my bad mood tonight." he said.

He slipped his arms inside her coat, wrapped them around her, and leaned in to hug her. Kate turned her head upwards for a kiss that didn't come.

Instead, Ben pulled his right hand back and traced her lips with one finger and grinned. Taunting her, he asked, "Oh, Katie, haven't you been kissed enough for one night?"

She froze, unable to say anything or do anything while his fingers continued to trace her lips.

"Sweet dreams, peanut," he said, then turned and walked to his car.

She stood there, lips on fire, watching him, wanting to run after him.

He paused before opening his door, and her feet finally decided to work. She ran to him, pinned him against his car door, ran her fingers through his hair, and pulled him into a kiss. Hands roamed, lips roamed, and he picked her up and pressed her agaisnt the car. A few minutes later, they broke for air, his hair in all directions, her blouse halfway undone by his kisses in her cleavage, his tie loosened and askew, his shirt unbuttoned except for two hastily-missed buttons in the middle, her skirt hiked up to her hips so she could wrap her legs around him, his left hand on her bare bottom holding her up against the car, his right stroking the inside of her thigh at her panty line, and her hand on his fly where she'd just been about to unzip him.

They stood there, momentum broken, aware of how close they'd come to having sex in Lauren's driveway. After an awkward pause, she said, "Oh, Benny, haven't you been kissed enough for one night?"

He smirked. "Not even close. It's still dark out."

"Would you like to come in?"

"Yes, I would - in oh so many ways - but tonight's not the right night." He gently let her down and pulled her skirt back into place for her. She started to button his shirt but he said, "No, leave it. It'll remind me of you on my way home." He leaned in for a short kiss. "G'night tiger."

#

Lauren heard a car pull into the driveway, but then didn't hear the house's front door open, so she eventually looked through the bedroom window's sheers to see if it was Kate. She saw Kate push Ben up against the car, drew in her breath hoping Kate han't hurt Ben, then chuckled softly as Kate closed in for the kiss.

She watched the two of them, most of their activities hidden by their long coats, right up until the part where Ben lifted Kate's skirt, pulled her legs around him, then pinned her to the car.

Did they or didn't they? Lauren didn't know for sure, nor did she particularly care so long as it didn't affect their work. Suddenly, Ben's visit the night before made sense, though Lauren wondered where Kate had been. Their passion sure reminded her how long it had been since Teddy died.

#

Ben slid carefully into his car.

Ben didn't understand what had just happened. Kate had clearly been with Justin the night before for reasons he didn't know and she obviously didn't want him to, then she wanted to have dinner with him again and had talked him into it despite his desire to be alone. She'd been very flirty, and he'd enjoyed himself, the dozen or so small kisses taking their toll on his bad mood.

Then there was that final - well, kiss was too mild a word given the mutual-almost-jumping-. Damn. She was leaving him with massive amounts of frustration, but he didn't want to jump her until she'd at least be honest what was going on with Justin.

When he got home, he took off his coat, then went into the bathroom to take a pic of his dissheveled self as Kate had left him. He snapped several iPhone pics, picked the one with the goofiest smile, the best lipstick smears all over his face, neck, collar, and upper chest, plus the disheveled shirt and tie. He emailed the photo to Kate with the subject: "What You Do To Me."

Ben then opened his dresser drawer, pulled out his cherry wood box for sentimental things, and put the peanut inside. The last thing he'd put in there was his engagement ring; the first, his grandfather's wedding ring.

He undressed and got into bed, muttering happily, "Oh, Katie." He hoped to hell she never, ever kissed Justin like that.


	5. Chapter 5: Shattered

**a/n: Updated to fix italics.**

Kate didn't like Ben being out of town for more than a day, even when he irritated the hell out of her. She'd started to find the lack of irritation more irritating than the irritation itself.

He'd never shared much about his cases unless she asked, and litigation was about presentation and strategy that drove her nuts, so she rarely asked.

For the fourth afternoon in a row, she found herself hovering by Leo's more than once, and Leo chuckled at her.

"No word yet," he said. "I'll come tell you. Promise. Justin called again."

"Ugh," she said. He'd been a total pest, calling 3-5 times a day since they'd slept together again. Half of those calls would be to her phone, half through Leo.

To her surprise, she got a text directly from Ben: he'd be back in the morning and, unsurprisingly, he'd won the case.

She responded, "Missed you. When you're back, remind me to talk to you about something."

#

Ben stood in the courthouse after the trial and looked at Kate's text, failing to notice opposing counsel closing in on him.

"You doing anything for dinner? Or after?" the redhead asked. Marian. She'd been fun once a few years ago, but she held no interest for him now.

"Sorry Marian, I'm seeing someone."

He remembered how much he'd wanted her that time, and how much fun they'd had, spending a whole weekend together rather than just a single night.

Before Kate, opposing counsel had been his main source of conquests. There was something delicious - like dessert - about ripping apart their case, then have the lawyers come up to him and proposition him after it was all over, where he could take another win in the rush of winning. That extra layer of defeating the opposition, as it were.

All that was nothing compared to Kate's smile, though.

Marian still stood there, hopeful, and Ben realized that he hadn't said no firmly enough.

"Thank you for the offer, but no. I've got to get this."

To Kate, he texted. "Okay, mystery woman, I will." Clearly whatever she wanted to say was personal, but he had no clue what it was about. He smiled. When he looked up, Marian was gone.

#

Once he arrived in the office, Ben found Leo the next morning.

"She here?"

"It's nine o'clock, the time prompt people show up."

"So that's a no."

"Would you like to leave a message?"

"Yes. For you." He paused. "I came by your place the other night. It was late, I'd had a few, I said a few things."

Leo smiled. "Is this a true/false quiz?"

"Leo, look at my face. It never happened. Do you understand what I'm saying to you? She can never know."

"Is this a mind wipe? Is this where I forget that Kate stood you up for dinner and you came over to my place looking all crazy eyed and desperate?" Ben was mortified at the image Leo presented, but he had been worried sick about Kate.

"Leo," Ben warned.

At that point, Leo went off on one of his weird tangents. Ben saw a frumpily-dressed woman with a bad haircut enter reception, and sat in one of Leo's chairs that faced away from her.

"You don't care about this at all?" Leo wrapped up.

"No, there's a woman in reception I'd rather avoid," Ben explained.

"Looks like a real man eater," Leo said sarcastically.

"She's different when things end badly," Ben said.

Kate bounded up. "What ends badly?" Oh. No. Not now.

Leo said, "Potentially all of this."

Kate looked between Leo and Ben and asked, "What's going on?"

Ben said, "Nothing."

Leo said, "Ben knows your opposing counsel in reception."

Ben said bitterly, "Thank you."

Leo added, "What? I didn't say you used to date."

Ben said, even more venemously, "Thank you again."

Kate said, "Wow, Benedict." Ben got up, buttoned his jacket, and kept his back toward reception as he slunk into his office. "Were you two Amish together?"

"Excuse me," he said. Ben slammed his door before Kate could finish her next biting line. He sat in his office chair, but turned away so no one could see how much he was shaking.

#

"Why is he so grumpy?" Kate said, and Leo acted weird. He gave her her coffee, so she said thanks and headed into her office, completely unable to deal with either Leo or Ben right then. Leo followed her with a file for her mediation with Ben's ex.

"Ohh, she said as she arrived in her office. "Do you think he's still mad about the other night?"

"Umm . . ."

"'Cause I didn't do anything wrong."

"Except for sleeping with Justin."

"Yeah, but he doesn't know that," she whispered. "And remember, I was working late." And, frustrated, she said more loudly than she should have, "And why would he even care?"

"Justin called. Twice. And your mediation is ready."

Kate gave Leo a Look, but it wasn't for him so much as the universe. Leo was mad at her about something, not to mention unexpectedly siding with Ben, Ben was grumpy, her mediation was with Ben's vindictive ex, and Justin had been a pest ever since they'd slept together again. She hadn't run into Lauren yet, but she was sure there would be something weird about that encounter, too. There wasn't enough coffee - or anything, really - for a day like today.

#

Ben saw the food trolley roll past his office, and heard Leo and Kate talking. He used the opportunity to slink out of his office and join his coworkers at the cart. Lauren rolled in with big news about a negotiation with Robin Archer; Ben felt left out being the last to know, but he had been gone and focused on his litigation for several days. After Leo left, he turned to Kate to ask her about her text message. She stuffed a cookie into her mouth. "Are you good?" she asked.

"I'm great," he replied. Just then, he saw that Beth was around the corner, so he slunk back into his prison cell of an office.

Later, when Beth and Kate were both out of the office and Robin Archer was a no-show, Ben strolled into Lauren's office to give her some negotiation tips. He made such a pest of himself that she literally shoved him out the door and closed it on him. He smiled, though, because he knew he was right and she'd listen and the firm would be better off for his temporary suffering.

If nothing else, he hoped she'd hear his last line, "Being over-prepared is a sign of insecurity," and take it in the spirit intended.

#

Ben decided to work on his ten thousand dollar couch. That left no line of sight for him to see Beth, or vice-versa, as she strolled around Reed, Reed and Grogan.

Kate burst in. "Tell me about," she pointed back to the mediation room, "Her."

Ben said, "She's a hand grenade in a Holly Hobbie dress. Why."

Kate said, frustrated, "I need her to back off." She paused. "I have an innocent woman who's about to be deported, and the only person who can vouch for her is a fugitive named Christie Mae Larssen."

"A fugitive."

"Yeah."

"And you know her whereabouts?"

"Sort of."

"Then you have to turn her in. Otherwise, you could be charged with aiding and abetting."

"I will, but I just need her to sign the statement to save the nurse first."

"You're going to track down a wanted terrorist to get a signature on a slip and fall."

Kate urged, "It's not how it sounds."

"Really? Which word should be different?"

"You," she pointed at him with both hands, "have a relationship with that . . . Beth . . . and I am asking you to use it to buy me a little more time."

"I am not sure that my relationship," he gestured air quotes, "is an asset here."

Leo came in and said that he'd found the fugitive's address. Great, now three people could be charged with aiding and abetting. Just wait until Beth found out.

"Ben," Kate said, steepling her hands in prayer, "please try."

Ben sighed, but he knew he'd do it because it was important to her. Well, there went his day. Also, his buzz from yesterday's win was now officially stomped on twice.

#

Justin's phone rang and he smiled. Finally. "You're not avoiding me, are you?"

Kate said, "What? No. God no." Then she went on to ask hypothetical questions about a fugitive.

Justin answered them, then asked, "Should I be worried here?"

"No," she said firmly

"Hey, uh, you wanna grab dinner . . . sometime?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah. I gotta go." She hung up, and Justin found himself still trying to talk into a dead phone. Typical Kate.

#

Beth was in Ben's office, handling one of his rare warrior helmets like it was a common teapot. Ben cringed, but didn't dare say anything.

"You've done well for yourself," she said, cradling the helmet.

"You too," he said agreeably, when it was clear she hadn't, "representing rich old ladies." He sat in his chair, which he'd lowered to give her psychological advantage. Beth put the helmet down, and Ben really noticed how few contours Beth had for the first time in years. Her body had never been the attraction; she was smart and had a mind like a steel trap.

"Used to be your bread and butter," Beth said, but Ben remembered that they had indeed been bread and butter - not dinners at Stratton's or an Aston Martin. Too many didn't pay at all, or only paid part of their legal bills and avoided paying the rest, and if one wanted their recommendation to get other clients, one put up with that kind of abuse. "You can take the boy out of ambulance chasing-"

"I need a favor," he said forcefully.

"You seeing anyone? The mediator's pretty when she's not talking." It had been ten years since Ben had dumped her, and she wanted to go out now? A thousand to one it was just so she could try to worm her way in again and dump him in revenge. Not a game worth playing even if he liked Beth, and her inquiry made him like her even less.

"Hold off on the settlement, Beth," he said in his best gentle pleading.

"What's in it for me, Benny?"

"What do you want?" He said directly.

"Let's have dinner," she said flirtatiously.

"No."

"You obviously didn't have much respect for me. I think that's why we broke up." He wasn't even going to try to make sense out of that one, but it is true that he didn't have a lot of respect for her. She did help him get through the first year of law school with his dyslexia by reading to him, but that's the only reason he'd stayed with her as long as he did.

"Really? I thought it was because you're a basket full of crazy." Craziness that continued for years, including telling women he was seeing that she was his fiancée when he'd never been engaged to her.

"It was a cute crazy before I met you." She walked around his chair and stood over him, turning his chair to face her. Ben knew her; this meant things were about to get seriously ugly.

"I need closure, Benny." He pulled in his lips and bit hard. "I need you to explain to me why it was okay to break my heart - and then evaporate." She paused. "I'm thinking maybe somewhere that serves a soufflé."

Ben stood up and moved away, buttoning his jacket. "How about coffee, some day?"

She moved in, resting a knee on his now-vacant chair. "How about to-day?"

Ben cleared his throat. He had to concede that was fair as he was asking her to do something today. Argh. Well, at least it would be over.

#

After Ben went to check in with Lauren, who he saw had been using several of his tips from earlier, then turned to leave, only to see an unhappy Kate entering the building. Kate pointed her head, and Ben followed.

"You can't just waltz her into the DA's office without a deal, they'll just screw her over." He sat down and unbuttoned his jacket to relax.

"But Justin says-"

"Who cares." He went into a rant about the DA's office.

"Not if we pre-negotiate a deal first," she said.

"Pre-negotiate?"

She explained what she'd been trying to work on.

"You really want to play that kind of hardball with the DA?"

"I really want to get her a fair deal, and I think the ADA," she gave a flirty shrug, "might listen."

"Maybe he owes you a favor. I wish you luck with that." He got up, buttoned his jacket, and started to leave the room. He didn't want to have a damn thing to do with calling in favors from Justin.

"Wait, wait, Ben, umm . . ." He turned. He knew what was coming, but felt powerless to stop it.

"I need you to be her lawyer. I can't do it because it's a conflict of interest with the mediation."

He turned, exasperated. "And?"

"And an innocent woman is about to get deported because of a lie."

He swallowed. Beth's client's lie. How many times he'd wanted to correct Beth's crazy but it just wasn't worth engaging not for the sake of his shaky reputation with women. However, it was worth engaging to have Beth lose a case.

"Look, don't do it for me." Kate grabbed his wrist and shoulder and led him back to her chair. "Do it for whatever reason your," she grabbed his lapel and turned him so he'd sit in her chair, "little selfish crocodile brain uses. Just," she threw up her hands in frustration, "do it for that."

"Okay," he said. "Fine." Kate glowed. Ben gave her instructions about a burner cell phone and said he'd make the remaining arrangements for her.

Leo opened the door. "Thank you," she said to Ben. "I owe you one."

Leo said, "Yes you do, and your nursing home fiasco is waiting for you in the conference room."

#

After another round with the nursing home, Kate stormed into her office. Leo followed her in.

"Justin can see you in twenty minutes," he said.

"Oh, good, good," she said sarcastically. Leo started to leave. "No no no. You get back in here." Leo walked back into her office. "No more bull. What is going on between you and Ben?"

After some arguing, Leo said, "Maybe you should talk to Ben about the other night."

"Why? He doesn't-" She stared off for a moment. Her defenses dropped and her face softened. "What?"

"He came to my place when you stood him up. He knows you went to Justin's. And he knows you slept with Justin."

"Wha- wait a minute. He came to your place?"

"'Round midnight."

"Because of me?" She looked incredulous.

"It wasn't for me." Leo paused for effect. "You didn't show up. He was upset."

"What does he care? I mean, look at Beth. He's the original destroyer."

"You're different."

"He said that?"

"He didn't have to."

She looked off into the distance dreamily while gathering her things, and Leo let himself out.

#

Kate entered Justin's office and closed everything carefully behind her. Justin chuckled in response until she told him she'd fund Christie Mae Larssen.

Justin pointed out he could just compel her to turn over Larssen.

"Do you ever just stop by to say hello?" Justin asked.

Kate ignored the personal question, stammering that she didn't know where Larssen was.

"Well, who does?"

"Her, uhh, attorney."

"Oh, come on. Grogan?" Justin flew into a rage. It was one thing to have Kate ask for favors for her own clients, but now she was calling them in for his?

Damn Kate, she knew exactly what to say to him to get him to agree to it, too. It'd be a feather in his cap in the election if he could pull it off. He needed to show leadership instead of showing that he'd been cowed by Davidson all these years.

"Courage is an angel." She said. "Courage is an angel that makes the difference between a good life and a great life. You said that to me the first time we spent the night together." Justin smiled, remembering that night and how nervous she'd been. "I don't know if it was the tequila talking or you just wanted to see me naked-"

"Probably was a little of both."

"Mmmhmm. But I never forgot it."

He rolled his eyes at her. "I actually meant it."

She said, "You know, Davidson doesn't play fair, but you do. So have courage." With that, she left, and Justin was tied in knots. She'd remembered, all this time and had never before invoked that line, so this was extremely important to her for her to use it now. It meant, basically, that if he wanted to sleep with Kate again, he'd better make it work. And he very much wanted to sleep with Kate again.

He stared into space for a few minutes, then called her back giving her a deal she Larssen could live with.

#

Ben watched as Beth pulled up to the coffee shop in a nondescript car and his stomach tightened.

She ordered a hot chocolate, which came in a tall glass with whipped cream. Beth sucked on her straw. "Did you really invite me to a cheap motel for coffee, Benny?"

"I had a meeting with a client."

"Am I your warm up?" What a blatantly offensive thing to say, implying he was sleeping with his clients. He was't the most ethical of attorneys, true, but he'd never slept with a client. Then to add Beth to the mix - eww, just eww.

"What do you want, Beth?"

"You've changed."

"Nope. Same guy, better suits."

"You think different. Helping People. Christie Mae, a fugitive."

"Who told you that?" Ben saw exactly how things were going to go pear shaped, and it was totally his fault. Crap.

Beth went on about Kate, and Ben said, "I have my angles. Can you just end this hostage situation and say it already?"

"You were a terrible person to me."

"I was."

"You made me feel awful."

"I did. What do you want Beth."

"Closure." She glared at him. Fine. So she wanted him to say it.

"I screwed you over like I said I would. I'm sorry you didn't believe me; can I go now?"

"Not until you tell me what you're getting out of all this. Or I'm just going to have to think it's because of that cute Kate Reed."

They glared at each other. If he admitted he liked Kate in any way, Beth was going to make sure that was well and completely ruined. Hell, it might still happen.

Beth added, "Are you whipped, honey?"

"You didn't believe me when I said that I wasn't good at relationships, and you're not believing me now when I say I am getting something out of this."

"Prove it."

He leaned back and thought of something. Kate had told him to use his crocodile brain, here was his shot. On the spot, he made up a book deal for Christie Mae Larssen's story. He knew someone he could call, they could work out the numbers, but it would get Beth off his back - and off of Kate's.

So he told Beth about the book deal, and Beth, disappointed that it wasn't about some relationship of Ben's she could ruin - again - threw her hot chocolate at him and ran out the door. Ben plopped a twenty on the table after she drove off, then called Kate to bring him a fresh shirt and tie from the men's executive washroom.

While he waited, he called a publisher he'd worked with and got a preliminary okay for the book deal. He wasn't happy about the numbers thrown out there, but that could be worked on later once there was an outline and sample chapters.

Just then, the taxi pulled up with Kate, and Ben got inside.

"Nice Rorschach," she said, admiring the chocolate spill.

Ben pointed to his chest. "I see closure." He started unbuttoning his shirt, and noticed Kate watching discreetly. "It is hot chocolate Beth never drank. I am marshmallow-y goodness." He started slipping off his shirt, and Kate openly stared, licking her lips. "Let's just say that this is what happens when I get too close to people."

"Ahh, wow. Well, for me, divorce happens."

"Well, it's probably a good thing we didn't have dinner the other night. I'd hate to think what I'd be covered in after you." The image that came to mind, though, was chocolate. Not in anger this time, but Kate's constant teasing, licking every last big of it off. Especially given that she'd just been looking at him with lustful thoughts, working her tongue over those lips. Ben suppressed a moan. From the looks of it, so had Kate.

Before either of them could do anything more awkward, there was a knock on the window; Christie Mae's husband.

Ben realized that everything was blown: Beth knew Christie Mae's whereabouts, and, despite Ben trying to shield Kate, he'd just blown it and she was no longer protected, either.

Kate and Ben went in to talk to a very heartbroken Natalie, formerly known as Christie Mae, coming unraveled to her very nervous husband. Justin called and said the deal was off. Kate said, "What?"

Justin said, "I didn't know about the book deal."

"Uhh, what are you talking about?"

Justin started yelling at her about the plea deal being off, and Kate and Justin started arguing and Kate popped outside. Kate saw the cops pulling up then came back into the motel room.

Ben heard the last line from Justin, "Maybe you didn't make this book deal, but you're not her only lawyer, are you." Justin slammed the phone down on Kate.

Kate glared at Ben. "You son of a bitch. A book deal?"

Everything started to unravel with the four of them in the room. Ben took command. "Legally, we can't tell you to run." He looked at Kate. "Right?"

Kate ran with the idea, giving them a way out of the room. Just as Natalie and her husband escaped, the police pounded on the door.

As soon as the police left, Kate turned to Ben and said, "A book deal?"

"It was supposed to stay under wraps until after she'd been arrested."

"How could you do something so _stupid_?"

"You told me to use my crocodile brain, so I did."

"So then you did it to screw Justin over."

"This has nothing to do with Justin."

"So you did it to screw me over because I slept with Justin." Ben paused and turned, staring at her.

"I- I- I- guessed that you knew because there were, like, a hundred innuendoes."

Ben found himself unable to say anything at all.

"I stood you up that night because I was having sex with Justin instead. All right? Big secret is out. Could we just move on?"

"I would love to move on." Ben explained the book deal and that it was for charity, but didn't say he'd thought of it due to Beth's pushing. That would only lead into territory he didn't want to talk about with either woman.

"If you and Natalie were the only ones who knew about the book, then who tipped Davison off?"

"I know who." Ben pointed out his error of not knowing Beth knew about Christie Mae, and how he'd told her about the book deal because that was his way of getting closure. He left out how much Beth had focused on Kate.

#

As they were driving back to the office through heavy traffic, Ben finally spoke. "I can't take it any more," he said. "What was the mystery text about?"

"You want to talk about that now?" She asked, surprised. "Now?"

He gestured at the traffic. "We aren't going anywhere fast. I've had an awful day today after a great day yesterday. There is very little you can say to me that will make my day worse, and quite a few things you could say that would improve it. Amaze me, Katie."

She laughed. "You put a lot of faith in me."

He gestured for her to hurry up.

"I'm awful at this, so-" She sighed and paused. "We seem to have a lot of chemistry, and sleeping with Justin was a mistake. I wanted to know if you'd have sex with me. Occasionally."

"You mean like friends with benefits? Or a romantic relationship?"

He glanced over; she was completely red from embarrassment. "Friends. Benefits."

Someone pulled out of a parking space and Ben quickly pulled in.

"What are you doing? We need to get back!"

"Allow me one minute." He set the timer on his phone, then leaned over and kissed her. Not the awkward insistent kiss like the first time, nor the thoroughly erotic kiss after the dive bar, but a gentle, tender, romantic kiss she didn't know he was capable of. She touched his face with her hands, and opened up to him, completely succumbing to his lips and tongue.

This kiss from Ben was like being out in the open ocean in calm glassy seas in a small rowboat, knowing the abyss could rise up at any moment and capture her, but she was perfectly safe for now.

By comparison, Justin was like being in an Olympic-sized pool where every corner, every detail, was visible and within a safe distance. The lifeguard ensured no one would get into too much trouble, and trouble was frowned upon.

And Kate liked trouble.

When the minute was up, she was panting, breathless, from the gentle force. She didn't know he could kiss like that. Holy crap. Her mouth hung open.

"Is that a friends with benefits kiss to you?" He asked.

"Uhh, no." She was more confused now than ever. "Don't you want me?"

"Are you kidding me?" He took her hand and placed it in his lap. She felt the rather large bulge there and chuckled.

"What's so funny?" He said with painful awkwardness.

"You're the only man who could actually make me feel _more_ comfortable by putting my hand on your man parts."

"It's my gift," he grinned, and started up the car.

Kate left her hand there longer than strictly necessary, but was still smiling when she withdrew it.

#

Back at city hall, Beth said to Ben, "We have to stop meeting like this."

"So did you finally get closure?"

"Come again?"

"I told you about the book deal I was getting Christie Mae Larssen, and you tipped off DA Davidson."

"Why would I do that?"

"I don't know. Are you shallow enough to do it to win your slip and fall, or was it just pure evil?"

"Like most things, I'd say it's a mix."

"I treated you like crap. I did. There was no class in the way I ended it. But you can't say it was unpredictable."

"You think pre-disclosing you're a jackass gets you off the hook. It doesn't. You gave me hope. That-"

"What? What."

"That it was a act."

"It's not. I deserve a hot chocolate apron or whatever karmic payback's coming my way. But Beth, that woman did nothing to you. And you changed her life - and her kids' lives - permanently. She'll never get a deal now."

"If she runs, I win. Maybe it is that simple."

"Winning is not everything."

Beth stared. "Wow. Looks like a woman finally got under Ben Grogan's skin." She glanced at Kate, walking up behind Ben, and Ben turned to look back. "I'm just sorry it wasn't me."

#

Kate walked up to Ben and Beth turned and left. Kate led Ben to a conference room where DA Davidson and Justin were waiting. Kate said Christie Mae wouldn't come in without a plea deal, Davidson threatened to arrest Kate, and Ben said that if that's how Davidson felt, he should arrest Kate.

Then Justin walked out of the meeting saying he had something else to attend to, and Kate blew up. "Oh, nice, Justin."

He unobtrusively left his pad on the table. On the top page was a drawing of angel wings. Kate understood the message.

She looked at Justin's legal pad, then said to Ben, "Can you write the number down." Ben tore off the top pages of notes, then started writing down the number, then left.

Kate accompanied Davidson to Natalie's place. The house was empty. Davidson accused Kate of tipping her off. Kate said, "I've been with you the whole time. How could I have done that?"

On television, Justin was announcing the deal and the footage showed Ben escorting Christie Mae into custody. Kate was so incredibly proud of both Ben and Justin.

#

At the end of the day, Ben walked into Kate's office with Natalie's file as a conversational pretext, hoping to ask Kate out. Naturally, Justin arrived as Ben and Kate were talking, and Kate left hand-in-hand with Justin. She did look back forlornly at Ben. Twice. Ben looked down.

He'd simply have to try harder.

Ben consigned himself to one of his rare nights of takeout food, then worked alone from home in a t-shirt and shorts.

He'd almost finished a draft of a motion when he got a text message from Katie.

"It was just dinner. I went home alone."

He studied it for a full minute before his fingers reached for the FaceTime button.

She answered, hair mussed a bit, in something flannel.

"Hi there," he said.

"Wow, you actually own a t-shirt?"

"Don't tell anyone. It'd ruin my reputation. It doesn't even have a fancy logo on it."

"And no place for a pocket square, either," she teased. She curled up on her pillow, and he could see her snuggling up as though he were there.

Ben asked, "Are you about to go to sleep?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Give me a minute." He pressed his phone to his chest, then walked into the bedroom, threw back the covers and got underneath them. Uncovering the phone's camera, he said, "There. now we're even."

"So you're finally in bed with me, Benny. Is it everything you hoped for?"

He chuckled. "It is lacking a bit in tactile sensation."

"Do you normally sleep in a t-shirt, Benny? That doesn't seem like you at all."

"No," he admitted. "Why?" he asked with a teasing smile.

"I'm actually wearing what I'd actually sleep in. Are you?"

"Uhh, no."

"I'm waiting."

Ben purred. "You want me to strip for you, Katie?"

Even with the low-res camera, he could see her blush. "Uhh."

After an awkward pause, he said, "Oh, Katie, own your desire."

He removed his shorts under the covers with one hand and flung them onto the floor, then set the phone down and pulled off his t-shirt slowly. He heard a whimper from the other end of the phone.

"Did I just hear a whimper?"

"No."

"Or a moan?"

"No." She shook her head.

"Here, let me help you," he said, repositioning to give her a better view of his chest.

"So not helping."

"I saw you staring at my chest earlier, don't try to deny it."

"It had chocolate all over it."

Ben purred. "So if I got my naked ass out of bed and went to the kitchen for some chocolate, you'd stare?"

"In your dreams, bucko."

"Sweet dreams then, Katie."

"Are you leaving me?"

"Only for tonight, tiger. I'll see you tomorrow."

"G'night, Benny."


	6. Chapter 6: Borderline, pt 1

Ben woke twenty minutes early the next morning, chuckling.

He started the double boiler on the stove, set out his clothes, then cooked up a small batch of chocolate truffles before showering and dressing.

He found a few triangular gift boxes, packaging up three truffles each for Kate, Lauren, Leo, and, of course, himself. He wrapped each box complete with bow, put the boxes in a small paper bag, and drove to the office early to distribute them.

Lauren was the only one in the office.

"What are these?" she asked.

"Truffles."

"I don't eat much in the way of sweets, Ben. Certainly not this early in the day."

"I know, you're all about fresh organic ingredients, which these all are. Guittard chocolate, Straus cream. Trust me."

She bit into one. "Oh. My. God. Where did you get these?"

"I made them this morning for the four of us."

"Wow. Thank you. I'll have to save the rest for later, but they won't last long."

Ben put triangular boxes on Kate's and Leo's desks, and left his own unopened triangular box on his desk.

#

Kate woke up dreaming of sliding down a waterfall of delicious gooey chocolate, landing in a pool at the bottom, splashing onto Ben, completely covering his face.

She felt different, then woke up enough to realize she wasn't wearing anything. After last night's call from Ben, she'd hung up the phone, then taken off her flannel PJs. She languished for a few moments in bed, recalling the awkward scene in Ben's car yesterday and last night's phone call.

She was confused about what Ben wanted. He'd turned her down several times, but that didn't seem to be his way from his history. And then he kissed her like he did yesterday. He was still like India to her.

Kate arrived at the office only ten minutes late, and Leo handed her a cup of hot chocolate.

"He put you up to this didn't he?" She asked Leo.

Leo smirked. "I know nothing."

Taking the hot chocolate, she said, "I still want coffee."

She opened the mystery box on her desk, destroying the red ribbon in the process. She picked one of the chocolates out of the box and took a big bite.

"Ohhhhhhhh . . . Leo." She walked out to his office. "This chocolate is better than an orgasm. Where did you get it?"

Leo said, "I had nothing to do with it. The boxes appeared on all our desks this morning."

Ben came out of his office and leaned in his doorway. "What's better than an orgasm?" He smirked. "Inquiring minds want to know."

"Did you get some of this?" She asked Ben, holding up the chocolate. Kate paused and really looked at his face, then walked over and poked him in the chest with her index finger. "It was you!"

Ben chuckled, then put one hand on her waist, leaned forward, and whispered in her ear, "Though my truffles are very, very good, you need better orgasms, tiger." Loud enough for Leo to hear, he said, "Yes, I made the chocolates this morning. I thought you might need them after yesterday."

She pulled away, bright red. "You _made_ these?" She said, incredulous.

He smirked again. "Mmmhmm. This morning."

Which meant his gesture was about last night's conversation. "Okay, then. I want your box, too."

''I'll be in court much of the day, so I'll hear your pleadings after I return, counselor."

"I'm not begging."

"You say that now." He used his finger to wipe chocolate off a corner of her lips, then licked his finger slowly.

His phone rang. "Grogan."

He listened for a moment, "Is this a new matter?" then walked into his office, leaving Kate standing awkwardly alone. She walked past Leo's desk pretending not to notice how much he was silently laughing at her.

Finally, she couldn't resist. "Shut it, Leo," she said with a smile.

#

After a frustrating day lining up mediations, Kate found herself outside the bar where she met Ben. She went inside, wondering once again why the hell Justin had picked the place. If there was anything that would help her sort out her feelings for the two men, it might be spending some time here.

She picked a table in the back, looking around at people searching for other people. She rebuffed inquiries from five men and two women. Her very trendy dinner was brought out on a triangular plate, and a familiar voice interrupted her.

"I didn't expect to see you here," Justin said.

She gestured for him to sit down. "I've been wondering all this time why you picked this place to sign divorce papers. Nothing here screams to me that's the kind of place it is - unless one wants to pick up a new date immediately after. Was that it?"

"I had a coupon, Kate. It was new, so they had offers in the papers."

"Well, you may have saved the firm by picking it, so there's that."

"Huh?" Justin looked perplexed.

"I met Ben here that night. Within a week, he'd bought into the firm."

"Lauren had said Ben came through your contacts. I just never knew how you knew him."

"I didn't. We never exchanged names."

"Oh, so that's how it was." Justin snorted.

"What do you mean?"

"You went home with him after he propositioned you."

"Is that what you really think?" Kate asked, puzzled.

Justin nodded.

She was tired of Justin's probing jealousy. She was tired of the whole thing. Suddenly, a lot of Justin's reactions to Ben made sense: he hadn't thought they were dating so much as that she'd slept with him. So many snide remarks and glances made sense now.

"Check please!" Kate said to the waitress.

"Kate, please." Justin implored.

"I'm tired of you feeling like you own me. Or you even know me, because clearly you don't. Or know Ben, for that matter."

"So what's the story, then?"

"I don't owe you the story. But, for the record, Ben didn't proposition me. Ever. I propositioned him. He turned me down." She omitted the multiple propositions as that was certainly none of Justin's business.

Justin looked at his glass of water. "You're right. I'd never have guessed that."

Kate rolled her eyes.

She paid up, and Justin offered to take her home, which she accepted.

Justin walked her to the door and hugged her. After being turned down by Ben and the constant teasing, she just realized she wanted someone to hold her all night. Something Ben seemed unwilling to do right now. With some reluctance, she invited Justin in. They got undressed, and Kate's phone buzzed. Incoming FaceTime from Ben. Great timing.

She declined the FaceTime call, then sent him a text message. "Tired. Already turned in. See you in the morning, Benny."

A text message came back. "G'night sweet pea. Sleep well." She smiled at her phone.

"Work?" Justin asked.

"I apparently have a new meeting in the morning," she lied, then rolled over to kiss Justin. Familiar, predictable, exes with benefits.

Once again, after sex, Justin was satisfied and Kate was not. Her last thought before falling asleep was that Ben could be right about the chocolate, but she wasn't going to find out tonight.

Or maybe ever. A tear formed. She rolled away from Justin and tried to sleep.

#

In the morning, Kate woke with one of her recurring nightmares: mediating cats and dogs. The usual way this ended was her admitting that she couldn't continue with the mediation because she was biased in favor of cats. She liked their spontaneity, their purr, their silky fur. If she got her own place, maybe she could have a cat.

This morning's dream was different. The lawyer for cats reminded her of Ben in his arguments, and the lawyer for dogs reminded her of Justin: always playing by the rules, being one of the pack, all that dog-type stuff.

Then everyone froze for an eerily long period of time, then a wave crashed through the window. The wave didn't scare her at all, but it dragged the dogs' lawyer out to sea, leaving her hanging onto the cats' lawyer. Just as she became fully awake and sat up, that lawyer morphed into Ben. Kate noticed she was in bed alone.

Kate's phone was ringing, and she sat there frozen, panting. It was Ben. She declined the call, then tried to recover her breath.

A few seconds later, Leo called. "Oh, I had the wildest dream," she said.

"I have Ben for you," Leo said.

"Well, just tell him I didn't pick up."

"I cannot tell a lie," Leo said, strained.

"Am I on speakerphone?"

"Yes."

She slapped her palm to her forehead.

"Morning Katie. Can't wait to hear about your wild dream. You can tell me about it on the way to Lake Tahoe."

"I'm not going to Lake Tahoe."

Lauren knocked on the bedroom door. "Come in," Kate said.

Lauren said, "You need to get up, you're going to Lake Tahoe."

"What the hell's in Lake Tahoe?"

Ben said, "A client. With a situation."

Lauren said, "A very wealthy client."

Lauren gestured to Kate's phone and said, "Is that Ben?" Kate nodded.

Ben said, "Chop chop, car's taking us to the airport. We'll be back by lunch."

Lauren criticized Kate leaving things on the floor, and then Justin appeared from the bathroom.

"Hi," Justin whispered to Lauren.

"Justin," Lauren said.

Ben asked, "Justin's there?" and Kate pressed the mute button on her phone. "Hello?"

Meanwhile, Lauren and Justin were having an embarrassing and awkward exchange.

Ben asked, "Did you guys mute me?" and Kate stuffed the phone under the covers to mute his voice.

Lauren bowed out awkwardly, Justin looked like he was gloating about being with Kate, and Kate was pissed off.

Ben said into the phone, "I'll see you in twenty minutes. Bring a parka." Then, in a soft, sexy voice, he said, "Bye, Justin." His tone made Kate blush, words rife with double meanings.

#

Ben hung up the phone and turned to leave.

Leo slowly lifted his tea and stared after Ben, who turned and said, "What. I could care less if she's sleeping with him." Of course that wasn't true, but he needed to keep things as smooth as possible in the office.

"Couldn't care less. Could care less indicates you care enough to care less. Of course, how much you could care depends on how much you do care, which is-"

"Zero," Ben said defensively. "And you can't care less than zero."

"True that, if that were true."

Leo's words echoed through Ben's thoughts. He'd set all this up, and now he was the fool for having gone to that much trouble. Worse, Leo knew it, and Kate would figure it out soon enough.

#

On the plane, Ben confronted Kate. "So you're sleeping with Justin again."

Kate, cued by Justin's suggested wording, said, "It's none of your business."

Ben said, dripping with disdain, "You're obviously back together."

"We are . . . somewhere . . . in between."

"You're in the middle, your favorite place to meet."

Kate changed the subject to the client and case.

Ben said, "I need a special master."

"Well, try Craigslist, I hear they have a personals section."

They joked about special masters for a bit, then Ben said, "Anyway, I went to a federal judge, and based on your stellar reputation as a mediator, I got you appointed as a magistrate, which means: you rule." He pointed at her. "You don't have to meet in the middle. You decide which agency gets the crime scene."

Kate balked at the idea of a crime scene and the existence of a body, then said, "I don't do murder."

"Good," Ben quipped. "Then you won't kill me." Because she might well have if she knew what he'd planned, especially after this morning. The fact that she wasn't willing to commit to being with Justin in front of him was promising. He'd just have to see how things unfolded.

#

The case turned out to be complicated. Bones found of a missing teen indicated it might be Carmen, a Nevada Sheriff detective's sister. Meanwhile, her then-boyfriend Jacob had lived in California, and the fight was between the two states and who should have custody of the case.

After interviewing Carmen's boyfriend and brother, Ben and Kate walked outside in the rain.

Ben said, "Father's got a point. Nevada's ready to hang that boy."

"Meanwhile, California police are tipping the dad off. You know they're hiding something."

"Probably that he killed the girl."

Kate said, "I don't think that. He loved her."

Ben said, sarcastically, "And people never kill the people that they love."

"I have this feeling in my gut."

"Well, we skipped lunch, maybe it's hunger."

She went back to talk to the law officers and said, "I am going to need the original case files sent to-" she looked at Ben, "where are we staying tonight?"

Ben looked at her with a slight smile. So far, so good.

#

When they arrived at the client's lodge, Ben asked, "How did I not anticipate that you would complicate this otherwise simple task?"

"Good question, Benedict. You know, there are plenty of mediators in all of San Francisco who'd be more then happy to flip your coin."

Ben turned on the living room's fireplace.

Kate chuckled. "Mmmhmm." She paused. "Why me?" He must have arranged this pretty quickly. Though she wouldn't admit it to him, she was obviously impressed.

"I guess I was foolish enough to assume that you might do me a solid."

"Or, maybe, this was just an excuse to whisk me away to your client's pied-a-terre and rob me of my virtue."

Ben started opening a bottle of champagne. "Oh, please. You haven't had your virtue since you were what . . . sixteen?"

Kate smiled, winked, and said nothing.

"Younger?"

She held her smile.

"Older!" Ben seemed surprised. At that moment, the champagne cork popped and Ben walked across the room.

"How many bedrooms does your client have?"

"I assure you, you are perfectly safe."

"Only if there's a lock on the door."

Ben stared out the window at the incredible view of Lake Tahoe spread out before them. "Wow. Look at the view. Oh, and hey, there's a hot tub."

"Of course there is." She didn't look. She was here for work.

Kate read the documents, discovering California had a sealed statement. Ben pointed out that would be incriminating, and Kate said it could also be used by people to incriminate him if they assumed he was guilty.

Ben asked softly, "Do you always trust your gut feelings?"

"Yes," she said without hesitation, then realized he wasn't asking about the case at all. Ben was asking how she felt about him. Her phone started ringing.

They went out to the crime scene, and events unfolded where Jacob was arrested for Carmen's death.

Kate stood there, talking to Ben after all the police had left. "You think he did it?"

"Yeah, but I am cynical."

She got all warm and gushy. "No you're not." Ben tilted his head. She shook her fist at him. "You're not that cynical."

Ben stood there, his face unreadable. "Says who?"

"Leo." Ben's face fell into that frustrating neutral he had, then Kate realized what she said and turned and started to walk away. This conversation was way too hot a topic for right now.

"What did Leo tell you?"

"No no no, forget it-"

"Okay, forget it."

She turned back and ran toward Ben. "Okay, so I know you went to Leo's looking for me the night I stood you up."

He stared at her for a moment, then croaked out, "I was drunk."

"No, you were upset. And Ben, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I just didn't think that you cared that much."

"I didn't," he barely muttered. "It's an ego thing. I don't get stood up. That's all it was."

Kate's face fell, and she asked for a ride from the remaining police officer rather than suffer in the car with Ben.

Ben picked her up from the station and they went to a dive bar for burgers, saying almost nothing to each other the entire meal.

At the end of their dinner, he handed her a quick drawing on the back of a business card that said, "I'm sorry. I was upset," and had a drawing of a peanut. The word "was" was underlined three times.

She smiled at him and hugged him, and his face lit up.

When they returned to the lodge, Kate read the case files until she fell asleep on the couch in front of the fire. Ben turned the fire down, but not off, and put a blanket over Kate, brushing her hair with his fingers.

"Sweet dreams," he whispered.

#

Kate woke to one of the sexiest things she'd ever seen: Ben in a blue bathrobe, chest hair curling out over the top, standing in the kitchen making breakfast for her.

"I didn't know how you liked your eggs, so I scrambled them," he said.

She looks over to the fax machine and asked what was on it, and Ben brought her Jacob's sealed statement taken the day after Carmen disappeared.

Kate's eyes went wide. "How did you get this?"

"I asked for it. You're the special master. You have the authority to see anything that's pertinent to the case."

Kate scanned through the statement, nibbling on her breakfast.

As she looked down at the paper, she said to Ben, "Fried, over easy. That's how I like my eggs."

She looked up, and Ben's intense neutral gaze was one she couldn't read. She felt the heat rolling off of her as the implications of what she'd said hit her, and she became embarrassed by them. She partially covered her face with the paper in a flirtatious peekaboo, and raised one eyebrow slightly. Ben continued to look right at her.

"Then that's how I'll cook them from now on," he said.

She smiled, then he smiled back, not looking away.

#

After the officers and Kate and Ben and Jacob hiked up to the place where Carmen and Jacob had carved their name in the tree, the officers turned to leave, and Ben started to follow.

He turned back to look at Kate, seeing her intensity, how much she believed in Jacob's love, how much she believed in marriage. He turned away, then looked down, seeing a heart-shaped rock at his foot. He picked it up and put it in his pocket, then looked back at Kate.

The intensity in her gaze scared him deeply. He hadn't allowed himself to feel that in so long, and it was always there, right at the surface for her. Walking up the trail, he kept his hand in his pocket around the rock except when Kate needed help navigating the tricky parts of the path.

When they got back to the car, he held her hand as she cried.

"Would you prefer to go out to eat, or I can cook you dinner."

"I can't face people right now," she said quietly.

"I'll need to stop at a store for a couple of things, okay?"

She nodded.

He hadn't seen her like this since the Lea Farran case.

When they got to the lodge, he suggested she take a shower while he cooked. He cooked the chicken and the sauce and the green beans just the way he'd expect in a fine restaurant, pulled out a bottle of red wine that would be compatible, and had it on the table only a minute after she arrived back out into the kitchen.

"Wow." She ogled the food he'd plated for them on the dining room table.

She ate almost a third of her dinner before breaking down in tears. "I can't imagine what it would be like to love someone that much and have them disappear."

"Neither can I," Ben admitted.

"I'm not sure I've ever loved anyone that much," she said.

Ben wanted to say something, but couldn't. Anything he might have said would have come across as a criticism of Justin rather than being about Kate, especially right now. He did love her that much, though, but he needed to find the right way to let her know.

After dinner, Ben cleaned up while Kate went to re-reading every nuance of the case files. Frustrated and lonely and afraid he'd say something idiotic, he put on his trunks and headed out to the hot tub with the rock he'd picked up.

#

Kate walked out to the hot tub to talk to Ben, sticking her feet in the tub and sitting on the ledge. She let him know the coroner's report was on its way and it wasn't looking good for Jacob.

"But I believe him," she said. "I believe that he was in love. I believe that they got married that day," she said more emphatically. "What's that?"

"It's a rock," he said. "Found it up there today. It's sort of shaped like a heart." He gave her a goofy smile.

She smiled back.

"Do you think it's ever possible to feel that way again?"

Her question confused him. "Like what?"

"The way it feels when you fall in love for the first time. Do you remember that?"

**a/n: A shout-out to my friend Ross who taught me how to make truffles.**

Ben stared at her, not quite sure where she was going with this. Of course he remembered. Despite his attempts to forget all his romantic failures, he remembered every one in excruciating detail.

"It's like this wave just washes over you, but you're not afraid to drown."

She looked down, embarrassed. "Wow, it's just so easy the first time."

"Love is never easy. You don't have to be seventeen, you just have to be brave." He hadn't been in love at seventeen, but he picked it as the next "older than sixteen" number from last night's conversation.

She looked away, pained. Bravery in her personal life wasn't her forte. Let's see if he could break through that wall tonight.

"I knew you couldn't just pick a side and then fly home. I wanted to stay the night, because I do care that much." He'd so hoped she would take the lead last night Kate looked up at him, surprised. "So do you."

Ben stood up and started walking toward her. "That's why you went back to Justin: because he's safe. And this you can't control because it scares the hell out of you."

He stood and started walking toward her. She stared at him, face tight.

"You want that wave." He stretched out his arm and gently grabbed her hand, but she came into the hot tub of her own accord, breathing heavily form the surprise of warmth and water.

She so near. He looked down at her, but she wasn't willing to look up at him.

"No strategy. No foreplay. No negotiation." Finally, she looked up.

"You just have to have the guts to dive in."

He paused for several seconds. "Do you?"

He held her gaze for several more seconds, then said, "Too late," then walked out of the hot tub into the lodge. Damn Justin.

Kate wasn't ready, and an extra awkward minute in the hot tub wouldn't change that. That wall was still intact.

#

Ben was close, so close, the mists from the hot tub caressing the both of them in the crisp night air, his lips so kissably near. Kate froze wondering what exactly she should do, what exactly he expected of her. Ben loved her? Was that what he was saying?

The bit with the rock was cute and flirty. What did he mean when he said he wanted to spend the night because he did care that much? In the same house? In the same bed? With sex?

Ben stormed out of the pool, and at that moment, Kate got out of her internal monologue enough to realize what she'd missed in those moments of confusion: he wanted her to close the distance, and she'd failed.

Instead, Kate stood there, frozen in place and completely drenched. She had almost no clothing with her, either, thank you Ben for mentioning only to everyone but her that this could be a several day trip. Was she supposed to work naked?

She got out of the changed into what little she had; her clean underwear was down to her emergency kept-in-the-purse-pocket walk-of-shame-night black thong. Well, at least it would be a good shame. Kate washed and hung her other undies so she'd have something clean to wear in the morning and donned a tank top without a bra.

Standing at Ben's bedroom door, she heard the shower running. As much as she'd love the full effect of him in the shower, especially after seeing the upper half in the hot tub, she stood there waiting. After a few minutes, the shower turned off and she heard him moving around, wondering what she'd say. A million things sped through her head, but he was still undecipherable in so many ways.

When he'd stopped moving around for a minute, she knocked on his door.

**a/n: Yeah, well, I had to end it somewhere...** :)


	7. Chapter 7: Borderline, pt 2

**a/n: Ahh, the other side of the door. I know I'm not the only one who didn't like the way the hot tub scene ended.**

When she knocked on the door Ben had just gotten into bed, so he grabbed a pair of boxers and put them on, then got back into bed. "Come in, Kate."

She let herself in. Ben watched her as she crossed to the far side of the bed and sat down next to him, pulling her long bare legs - for such a short person, anyway - up close to her chest. His breath caught from her proximity and state of undress, not to mention the arousal her presence caused.

"Are you here to torment me again?" he asked.

"This is really hard, Ben." She was shaking.

"Okay," he smiled, "then I guess you're here to torment both of us. How can I help?" He put his hand on her back to calm her.

She chuckled and relaxed a bit, and she offered a hand for him to take. He took her hand in his and massaged gently. Neither said a word.

Finally, she broke the silence. "Ben, I don't know what you want. I hit on you several times and you keep saying no, but you kiss like you're saying yes. I call you on your visit to Leo's and you deny that you care. I know it's not like my high school boyfriend who wanted a cover girlfriend, but it feels too much like it some days."

"Is he how you learned not to trust yourself?" Ben asked gently.

"It's how I learned that things were not what they seemed, sometimes in important ways."

Ben said, "Remember how I said that small victories were better than none, and you said that wasn't true?"

Kate nodded.

"You were right. I'm not looking for small victories. I never do, but sometimes I console myself with them."

She released her hand from his tender ministrations, then leaned over and kissed him gently, and he returned her kiss in kind.

"Mmmm," he murmured as the kiss got longer and deeper.

She broke away for a moment, and Ben was afraid she was going to leave.

"Can I stay?" she asked.

"Can? Oh, I'm sure you're entirely capable of that. You certainly may stay, though."

"I hate lawyers," she teased.

"Really? Because I'd prepared this amazing set of oral arguments just for you."

"Ben, that is the cheesiest line I have _ever_ heard, and that's saying something."

"Seems to be working," he said, noting her pulling back the covers on the other side of the bed.

"I'm getting in bed despite the line, not because of it." She stuck her tongue out at him, then nestled in under the covers.

"Is that your best oral argument?" he asked.

"No, but I'm not presenting mine just yet," she gloated.

Ben sat up, leaning on his elbow. "Are you really ready for this?" Ben asked, perfectly aware that she probably wasn't.

"Look, you arranged this whole thing - with Lauren, a private airplane, a swanky mountain lodge, hell, a Federal Court - so you could whisk me away and spend a couple of nights with me. So maybe it's not going to happen exactly the way you've hoped, but after you sat there and poured your heart out, you're going to get at least the letter of what you'd been seeking. I'm spending the night with you. In your bed. Deal with it." She pushed him back onto the bed.

Ben smiled. "Yes, ma'am." At least?

"Don't you ma'am me, Benedict Yancy."

"All right, Katherine."

"Call me Katie."

"You don't want me to call you tiger?"

"Tiger's okay."

"How about Catwoman?"

She thwapped him with a pillow.

"I'll take that as a yes."

"What do you really want to call me?" She teased.

_Wife_. The word entered his thoughts unbidden, and he didn't repeat it. His lips parted and he breathed deeply. He suddenly needed the extra air.

Ben wrapped his arms around her for strength.

"Wow," she said, "that must be some word." She placed her arms gently on his shoulders.

"Yeah." He stared past her. He was so screwed. She'd run back to Justin all over again. Ben knew he loved her. He'd known it since the day he went to Hayward just to catch her fall when Lea Farran's parole rehearing failed, as he expected it would. The kiss later that day was his fumbled declaration of love, though she didn't seem to understand it that way. Even though he'd thought about marrying her in an abstract way since then, he hadn't really realized that that's what he truly wanted. Until now. Hell, they hadn't even been on a proper date yet.

He recovered after a few moments and smiled at her. "At least, huh?" he teased.

"You asked me earlier when I lost my so-called virtue. I was twenty, and it was with Justin. We met in college. We weren't married, but we got married only a few weeks after we met."

Ben turned to look at her. "So he's been your only?"

"He has."

Which made him cheating on her that much worse, didn't it? He wasn't going to say that, but he stroked her face. "Now I understand why it's been so difficult for you to move on."

"That plus the feeling that if I give up, I'll have lost." She wouldn't admit it, but she liked winning as much as he did. They just cared about different outcomes, and his kind of winning wasn't her kind of winning. He could understand being a dogged jackass about a relationship after it was all but over, but he wouldn't bother trying after someone filed and served divorce papers like Justin had.

"I was seventeen, I've had four serious relationships," he mentally counted, "six that lasted longer than a handful of dates but weren't serious, and I never counted the one-night stands and brief relationships, of which I've had more than my fair share, but fewer than some men I know. In all but two cases, I was the person dumped. So I do have experience with that, alas."

"It's not the same."

"I know that. I win on quantity, not quality," he said sarcastically. "If you call that winning. I never married. I've never been with anyone longer than three years, and it's not the same as a relationship dissolving that's been a third of one's life."

"Plus the divorce filing was right before my dad died, so part of my problem is having to deal with all of that - and Lauren and my job - all simultaneously."

"That's a lot to deal with." Ben was still reeling from the word, and didn't notice Katie closing in until her lips were a millimeter away from his.

Ben looked into her eyes and said, "So I'm guessing you don't normally proposition men in bars or ask people in for revenge sex."

"Never," she said, touching his lips with hers ever so slightly. "Except for you."

A swell of hope washed over him, Kate's wave. He rolled slightly toward her, teasing her lips with his in an almost kiss.

"So what was that word that rendered Benedict Yancy Grogan speechless?"

He pulled back a bit. "Oh, no. You'd go running away at Warp 9."

She frowned. "No I wouldn't. But I could leave right now." She put her hands on his pecs as if to push him away.

He was torn. Either way, it'd be bad. She'd know if he lied, plus then she'd trust him less; she'd run if he told the truth. "I'll tell you in the morning, but only if you stay with me tonight. All night."

She studied his face for a full minute before answering. "Morning, then. Now kiss me."

His kiss started off with a smile, like the kiss in the elevator, and she returned in force. This time, there were no apologies, no forgetting things, no having to be somewhere else. There was only here, and now, and each other.

Still, Ben couldn't help wondering. Was it better or worse to seduce her now, then insist she make a choice between him and Justin? If she were just sleeping with Justin out of a need for sex, maybe he could woo her that way. He was sure he was a better lover than Justin. Once he'd seduced her, it'd be a lot easier to get her to leave Justin. He hoped.

Or maybe that was just some bullshit rationalization.

Her hands ran through his hair, sensation tingling all the way to his toes. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into him, pressing her up against his erection. Katie let out a soft sigh of surprise.

"There's just one rule."

"Oh?"

"You sleep in my bed, you sleep naked. So do I."

"Mmm," she smiled. "Sounds fair." Her hands caressed his neck, then traveled down to his chest hair, where she started petting him like a cat. He purred in response, and she laughed.

He ran his hand down her side, running his finger along the the waistband of her thong as she moaned with pleasure.

"Do you normally wear a thong to work?" he whispered. "Not that I mind," he uttered sexily, his finger continuing onward.

"Wouldn't you like to know," she teased.

"Lawyers. Briefs. Professional curiosity," he smirked.

"If I had any extra hands, I'd hit you with a pillow," she said.

He chuckled.

She didn't say anything, but moved so his finger could continue tracing the boundaries of her panties, then kissed him again. When his finger got to the front, she shuddered and moaned.

"I half expected you'd be a breast man," she said, pushing him onto his back and straddling him before slipping off her tank top and dangling her breasts over his chest.

"I'm an 'all parts of Katie' man," he said, gently stroking her breasts, rolling her nipples in his fingers, kissing down her neck until she shuddered.

He gently rolled her to the side, moving down enough to take her nipples into his mouth. He slipped off her thong, and felt her slide his boxers down. He took a moment to take them the rest of the way off and drop them on the floor.

She started moving toward him and he slipped his hand down to her silky wetness, pushing her slightly away. She pushed back.

"Katie, trust me. Don't try to negotiate. Let me make love to you the way you need." She relaxed hesitantly.

He kissed her stomach down to her bikini wax line, then caressed her softly. He spread her legs apart, resting his head on her right thigh, and slid his fingers along her clit. She moaned, and he slid two fingers inside her, his lips descending into her silky wetness. He flicked his tongue until she shuddered and moaned with pleasure. She ran her fingers through his hair as she came, murmuring.

"Best oral arguments ever," she finally managed to whisper as Ben massaged her thighs. Then he started all over again, more slowly this time, her second climax longer and slower and harder.

"Oh, Ben," she said as soon as she recovered the ability to speak.

He moved up to hold her, pressing his erection against her stomach. "I hope you saved some for me," he said.

A sultry laugh came from the petite woman next to him. "Oh yeah." He rolled onto his back so he could reach into his briefcase. He brought a few condoms out of an inner pocket and tossed them on the nightstand.

"Big plans, huh?" she teased, rubbing his cock.

"Very. You do have an option, though. We could move into the living room in front of the fire, and I could bring out glasses of champagne."

"You're just trying to get me out of your bed, bucko."

Ben looked puzzled. "Or we could stay here," he recovered quickly, "but I do like the romance of fireplaces and nice carpets and quality spirits."

"Talked me into it," she said, kissing him. She picked up the comforter, grabbed onto his cock with her other hand, and led him into the living room before he could so much as kiss her. So. Hot. So many times, he'd hoped that her dragging or pushing him somewhere would lead to further touching, and this time it actually would.

He lit the fireplace then selected and poured champagne for the both of them, bringing the rest of the bottle in an ice bucket and putting it on one of the tables.

Kate had already moved the table to give them full use of the supersoft silk shag carpet. She lay there in naked splendor, lit only by firelight.

He handed her a glass of champagne, then settled next to her, grinning.

They toasted each other, and he ran his hand up the inside of her thigh.

"What, pray tell, would my Katie like to do next?"

She handed him a condom, then said, "be who you are and take me."

He donned the condom, then moved on top of her, using a pillow to position her at the best angle.

"You're shaking," he said, worried.

"I'm nervous, Ben. Take me anyway."

"Do you want to relax first? There's probably some massage oil around here. I'd love to do that for you."

"Last time I had a massage, I argued with the therapist and she asked me never to come back." Ben smirked. "So, are you willing to wait until the end of the universe?"

"No," he admitted, "so long as you're okay." She nodded. He thrust gently inside of her, feeling resistance.

"Oh God," she said, squirming with pleasure.

"Hmm?"

"You're bigger than. . . ." She didn't finish the sentence, but she didn't need to.

Ben chuckled. "I'll go slowly, then. Just relax, tiger." He adjusted their position slightly, then slowly slipped in deeper, causing more pleasurable moaning from her. Her sounds electrified him as he thrust slowly in and out, trying to keep himself from coming too early due to his own excitement.

He felt her tighten as he finally plunged fully inside. She sighed happily, then moaned.

"Just take all of me, Ben, over and over."

"Oh, Katie," he chuckled, "I don't need to take you because you're already mine." He felt the thrill rippling through her and kissed her again. "But I will anyway."

"You're that kind of guy," she said throatily.

"Mmmhmm."

He moved her hands to the side of her head and held them down with his own. "Push against me," he said, and he could feel her climax beginning. Her skin glistened with sweat in the light cast by the flickering fire. She was so hot, Ben could imagine steam rising up from her, and his own sweat hissing and vaporizing as it hit her body.

"You were mine when you returned my kiss in the elevator." He teased her lips with his own and kept her at the edge of orgasm as he thrust inside her.

"You were mine when you were worried about me and took me out to the dive bar and force fed me."

"You were mine when you came into my bedroom." He felt her quiver around him.

"You were mine when you kissed me tonight."

"You were mine when you asked if you could stay." Her breathing was heavy and rough.

"You were mine when you came for me tonight. Twice."

He whispered into her ear, "And you are mine right now."

"Admit it," he whispered, looking into her eyes.

She shuddered and said, "I'm yours, Ben. All yours." All her pent-up energy released at once, and she pushed hard against his hands for maximum penetration. He sped up slightly, penetrating her fully, taking every last bit of her as she moaned and gave herself to him, contracting around him in waves.

Then he thought what he would not say: he was already hers, not just in moments, but always. That thought alone brought him to climax along with her.

When they'd finished, he released her hands, holding her face with his hands and kissing her softly.

They rolled so that his back was to the fireplace and he remained inside her, his arms holding her. A small tear ran down her cheek, and he wiped it away with his thumb.

"Are you okay?"

"Perfect," she said, staring into his eyes.

"Just a minute," he said, and went to fetch a bag to put used tissues and condoms in, then settled back down with Kate in his arms.

#

She couldn't help looking at Ben, touching his face, joining him in a soft kiss, just trying to prolong the moments they'd had sharing themselves with each other.

Running her fingers through his hair, she said, "I've never felt anything like that."

He smiled and said, "that's because you've never really belonged to anyone before."

Kate frowned. She'd been married to Justin, but that's clearly not what Ben meant. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, Katie, you and I both like being control freaks of our own lives too much. But you have to let go sometimes. Everything you felt tonight was your feelings: how you felt about yourself, how you felt about me, how you felt about us. How willing you are to be vulnerable, and to fuck with abandon."

"Yes, you do that last rather well."

"As do you."

A few longing glances later, Kate again broke the silence and said, "Your former fiancée was crazy, by the way."

"Oh?"

"Anyone who would cheat on that kind of sex has got to be insane."

"Katie, there are people who are monogamous by nature, and there are people who are not. I am monogamous by nature, but she was poly. I kind of knew that all along, so it was my fault for not picking up on the clues earlier. She's probably far happier being in an open relationship with her husband, another man, and another woman. She never really belonged to me, no matter how much we tried to pretend otherwise."

"That sounds exhausting."

"I'll show you exhausting," he teased.

She'd already had three orgasms tonight, one more than she'd ever had in one night, but Ben showed no obvious signs of fatigue. She teased him by running her finger up and down his body, kissing him at random intervals. She then caressed him with her hair, then a mix of kisses and tongue.

He stretched out like a cat, absorbing every bit of attention she gave like a love-starved sponge, reaching out to stroke her hair, her hips, whatever he could reach that built her excitment without interrupting her flow.

She straddled him and leaned over him, looking into his eyes.

"Are you up for more?" she asked.

"I hope so," he said modestly as his cock voted yes. She felt the movement of his growing arousal brush her inner thigh, and a thrill of anticipation ran through her body.

She leaned back, reached for a condom, and slipped it on him, then positioned herself to take him.

"Show me what you do, Katie," he said.

After she mounted him, she moved more slowly, more carefully, taking in every look on his face, every sigh he made, every movement of his hands on her body. She'd always expected he would be a skilled lover, but she'd completely underestimated how his laser-like intensity would affect her. He never looked away, never closed his eyes except to blink, and she felt like he was looking deep into her heart.

His tenderness with his hands, his gaze, told her how much he cared for her, how much he needed her, and as her body began her orgasm, she knew what word he'd wanted to call her. It was written all over his face in the flickering firelight, and all she could do was smile and bask in the incredible warmth and tingling that shot through her entire body.

"Oh, God, Ben!" she yelled, and a humongous grin crossed his face as he joined her in climax.

After they'd untangled their bodies, she curled up in his arms. She felt a hundred miles wide in all directions, enveloping Ben and everything around them. After a few minutes, Ben looked at his phone. "We can still get five hours of sleep if we start now. Shower first?"

She suddenly became shy.

"Katie, I've touched every bit of you already, and I want to touch all of you again."

"Okay," she conceded. "We should also probably sleep in an actual bed rather than on the floor." They carried the bedding back to Ben's room, and he prepared the shower, dropping the paper bag in the trash can.

She took his hand and stepped in.

He lathered her body with his sandalwood-lime shower gel, gently washing every bit of her, his hands caressing everywhere. She moaned with pleasure. She'd never been bathed like this, like she was being - yes, that was it - worshipped.

Justin had never worshipped her.

He towel dried her and carried her to bed, then curled up next to her.

She said, "You know what I wish had happened when you kissed me in the elevator?"

"No, what?"

"I was so hoping you'd wait for me while I got my phone. I'd wanted to kiss you more, and then I'd probably have gone home with you. If I had any idea you were this amazing in bed, I'd definitely have gone home with you."

He leaned back to study her.

"That would have been nice." He leaned over to kiss her. "I'll make it up to you."

"You just did."

#

He woke before his alarm, dreaming about Kate and her tongue and his cock. He squirmed slightly from the arousal, then reached down to touch himself only to find Kate's hair. At that point, he wakened fully, and he found himself a hundred times more aroused by reality than he had been by his dream.

She took complete advantage of him, her tongue and hands knowing exactly what he needed, and he found himself climaxing before he'd even had a chance to say as much as hello.

"Oh, Katie," he finally managed.

She slid up into his arms.

"That was a very pleasant way to wake up, thank you." He beamed. "Are you sore this morning?"

She laughed. "Oh, a little bit, but I think with some coffee and ibuprofen, I should be able to manage a day's work."

He smiled at her and stroked her hair, kissing her gently.

Unfortunately, it was almost time for the talk he'd planned on the night before. The fear in the pit of his stomach would not go away.

Their conversation in the hot tub had cured him and wounded him all over again. He saw how passionately she believed in love, in how she believed in marriage despite having had one that failed. He'd been so wounded over his fiancée's betrayal, he thought he'd never believe in marriage again.

Yet, her belief encouraged him to pull her into the hot tub, to encourage him to take that next step, and, so help him, to want to marry her even though he knew she wasn't ready to hear it and he was far from ready to do it. But Ben was a man of his promises, and he had promised.

"Word," she whispered.

"Kate, the word I want to call you more than anything - I only realized it when you asked me to tell you last night."

"Oh?"

"That word is _wife_."

Kate stared openly for a full minute before answering. "Wow."

"I know. The only reason I'm telling you is because you were so insistent. This hasn't gone well for me before, and it scares the hell out of me. Your belief in marriage and love over this case made me rediscover my own."

She looked up at him and stroked his face. "You got this serious, but also cool, faroff look. It was very dreamy. I figured it out looking at you during that last orgasm."

"The one where you called me God?" Ben smirked. "Not that I mind, speaking of pet names."

She thwapped him with a pillow.

_Pillow fights, movie nights, up gossiping until dawn._ Well, half of one came true.

She curled up with him, putting her head on his shoulder.

He couldn't speak for several minutes; his throat was closing up. She seemed so ready to accept him wanting to marry her, and he wasn't expecting that at all. But if he wanted any chance of getting what he truly wanted, he needed to draw the line in the sand and stick with it.

"That was maybe the easy part of what I had to say, here's the hard part. Your thing with Justin, whatever it is: I'm not into open relationships. I'm not into being number two. I'm not into being number one of a group larger than one. I'm not into being the rebound guy."

She frowned, obviously hurt. "Then why have sex with me?"

"Because I'm deeply into playing unfair when it comes to getting what - or who - I want. So are you. But I do know you haven't looked happy. I do know you're trying to make yourself look available to me while you're sleeping with Justin, which is flattering on one level and insulting on another. I'm sure Justin would feel the same. I'm also betting you've never had sex as good as what we had last night. Ever. And that's why I played unfair, in case it was my only shot."

Kate's mouth was hanging open.

"Look, I don't know what is going on between you and Justin, and I don't care. Just let me know when it's over for good and you're ready to have a relationship with me. If we're lucky, I won't have given up and moved on."

"Until then?"

"We're colleagues. And you're the decider."

Kate picked her clothes up off the floor and walked back to her room, trying not to let him see her cry.

#

Ben got dressed and made breakfast for the both of them, then, when Kate came out, her eyes were puffy and he felt sad for her. He had never hated himself so much for trying to protect his own heart.

He served her breakfast without comment, and she nibbled at the food politely.

They got dressed and Ben drove them to the meeting with the coroner, where Ben sat in the back with his hands clasped in front of his crotch, feeling vulnerable after the events of the last day.

Kate kept looking at Ben, and, toward the end, when the wedding ring was poured out of the manila envelope into the brother's hand, then given to the dead girl's quasi-husbnad, Ben looked at Kate. She looked at him and looked down, the ring and his gaze a reminder of Ben's desires.

#

Kate really couldn't blame Ben for what he said, but she didn't have to be happy about it.

Kate consoled herself with the fact that she'd put the rock in her purse last night. The case wrap-up was amazing, but the personal relationship had her twisted in knots.

The plane ride home was awkward. They both wanted to say other things, but didn't, so they went into stupid awkward work stuff. Kate couldn't handle it when Ben complimented Justin's work on a case he'd been assigned.

She worked late. For once, Ben left on time. Leo wanted to talk to her, but she glared at him and he went home, too. She kept pulling out Ben's heart-shaped rock. About the tenth time she'd pulled it out after Ben left the office, Justin stepped into her doorway.

"Ohh," she said, putting the rock down discreetly, "Hi."

Justin apologized for not calling, and Kate said about the case he'd wrapped up in her absence, "Oh, hey, I hear congratulations are in order."

After some awkward moments, Justin asked, "How was your trip?"

"Uneventful," she lied, frowning.

"So while you were gone, I had an epiphany."

"Ooo oooh," Kate said unhappily.

"I don't want us to just _be_, I want to make promises." Kate looked down at the heart-shaped rock. "I want to make plans. I don't want to settle for anything less."

"I just-" Kate tried to interrupt.

"Oh no no no no, hear me out on this, okay?"

She looked up at him, pissed off.

"We belong together, Kate. We're not the same people we used to be. We can win if we both refuse to lose."

What Kate wanted to win, though, wasn't Justin. Tears began welling up in her eyes about the conversation with Ben that morning.

He continued, "You said I always get what I want. Right? I want you."

He'd forgotten that the context she'd said that in was when he always got what he wanted was about a job, not about her. As for wanting her? Yeah. Right. Today he wanted her. What about next week? What about next year? In another month or three, he'd re-hash the same argument they'd had last year when he'd ended it, then they'd started it up again, then she had the pregnancy scare, then they'd ended it again.

She'd learned so much about herself in that one evening with Ben - were things truly dead with Justin? All this time, she'd thought maybe it was herself that was dead inside, and that's why the sex was so blah. Clearly that wasn't the case, as Ben proved. How could she even ponder that kind of relationship with someone else until she'd tried one last time with Justin? She didn't want to make promises or plans with him, but agreeing to what he wanted was the only way to try things out. Otherwise, he'd just push her away for the twenty-somethingth time.

Kate said, "Okay," to Justin and let him hold her in her arms, but she looked down at the rock for strength. She was falling for Ben, but she had so much more history with Justin, and the idea of Ben wanting to marry her was terrifying.

#

Ben called Alessandra. "I have a case update, but I need you as a friend tonight. May I come over?"

Alessandra shooed her four kids and husband out of the kitchen when Ben arrived, bribing them all with her amazing lasagne. Ben looked like he'd been ripped apart, and she didn't even ask before taking him into a big hug. He sobbed on her shoulder like one of her children, and she comforted him.

He started trying to talk about the case, and she said, "Shh, this is more important right now."

After a few minutes of expressed grief calmed him down, she got him to sit at the smaller kitchen table, then served up lasagne for the two of them, fetching him a nice red wine from Santa Cruz Mountain Vineyards she knew he liked.

"Tell me what's going on in your heart, Ben."

"She made me believe in marriage again." He looked down. "I- I didn't know that was possible."

"I did."

He looked up at her. "Really?"

She nodded. "You've always had a romantic streak. You just hide it well."

"Yeah, well, she's sleeping with her ex again. I called to arrange for her pickup for your jet and her ex was there. Talk about awkward. Lauren knows about Justin and Kate and so does Leo. I felt like a fool."

"Ben, you aren't the one being foolish from what you've said. Be proud of who you are. She'll come around."

"I know." Ahh, his heart and his head disagreed. His heart still felt all the fear of past wounds, but he knew what his real chances were.

After a couple more minutes of hugging him, she asked gently, "So how did the lodge go?"

"She wasn't as mad at me about that planning as I feared she'd be. We slept together, but then I told her she'd need to dump Justin. She sensed how I felt about her and she pushed. I knew I'd lose her if I evaded, so I just owned up. And now she'll run to Justin again because she's afraid."

"You want my opinion?"

"That's why I'm here. That and to steal some of your lasagne."

She laughed. "Every morning, one single new flower on her desk. Don't repeat any flower more than once every week and no red roses. Pink, maybe, but no more than one rose every other week. Go for variety of flowers. One big daisy one day, a carnation the next, then a stargazer lily, etc."

"What if I'm out of town?"

"Two possibilities: one is to send her an email with a picture of a flower. The other is to do nothing and make her miss you. Pick one approach and stick to it."

"Thanks. I can do that."

"Let me get Geo in here for the case update."

Ben told them both about how amazing Kate had been, and Alessandra smiled at the tale of the poor love-struck boy she'd saved. Alessandra just hoped Kate would have the sense to save another. Otherwise, she might have to go all Sforza on Kate's ass.


	8. Chapter 8: Force Majeure, pt 1

**a/n: Did anyone else think it weird that Claudia, whose specialty is love songs, didn't pick up on Ben/Kate? Seemed like a plot hole to me...**

After putting the incredibly yellow daffodil in Kate's flower vase, Ben walked around the corner, only to see a man who looked like Robin Archer waiting in the conference room with his lawyer. Ben hightailed it back to Leo's desk.

"Who's in the conference room?" Ben leaned over Leo's desk.

Leo replied, "Good morning, Leo."

"Is it Robin Archer?"

"I like pleasantries, Benedict."

"Cute top." Ben paused for effect. "Is Robin Archer, the billionaire, in our conference room?"

Lauren whispered from his office, "Yes, he is, shut up!"

Ben went to join Lauren, trying to help her calm down while he tried to understand why a billionaire would actually show up to a negotiation at Reed, Reed, and Grogan. Some people would be impressed by rock stars or actors, but not Ben. Ben was impressed by self-made billionaires.

"Whatever, he's just a man," Lauren said.

Ben smiled. "Are you hiding in my office?" then made up bullshit to kill time for Lauren.

Kate came in, announcing that Robin was in the conference room. Lauren left, then Kate turned back to him. He gave Kate his biggest, most charming smile and a nod, and she beamed back.

His happiness was not long-lived. Kate went to her office and discovered that Justin had left tickets for Claudia Alves. Damn, now she'd probably think the flower came from him, too. Ben paced by the door to hear the conversation with Leo. So she liked Brazilian singer-songwriters, huh? He'd have to figure out what else she liked so he could surprise her. Instead of Justin doing it because he knew her better.

Leo asked, "So, are you and Justin officially-"

"No. No no. We're not officially anything," Kate said. "We are simply just trying things out."

In other words, they were sleeping together again, which is exactly what Ben didn't want to hear this morning. Or any morning. Or any evening. Or any moment at any point after the creation of the universe, if he were to be completely honest. He stopped pacing his office and stood in the door wanting to yell at her.

She said, "You know, these are very spur of the moment. They're not very . . . Justin-like."

Ben couldn't resist barging in and interrupting. "Perhaps he's making a point. You'll like me better if I'm not who I am."

Kate said defensively. "Thanks so much, Benedict Yancy."

Ben frowned awkwardly, and Leo turned his back to Kate.

"Leo, I could use some coffee," Kate said.

Leo walked away, ignoring her. Ben walked to his office and sat down facing away from her. He just couldn't bear to look right now.

#

Robin Archer coolly appraised the woman who'd kept him waiting. He knew about her history as a bartender, the classes she'd taken in law school, he'd even read some of her filings. He was impressed with her having gotten landing spots at SFO. She was a real firecracker.

"You secured those landing spots in the last two days," he said.

"I don't like to stay idle," she said. Was that a personal statement or a professional one? Or both?

He accepted her offer and invited her to lunch the next day.

As he turned to leave, he shook her hand and said, "Nice tangoing with you."

"Tangling?"

"Tangoing. It's a dance."

She showed the slightest bit of fluster in her reaction. Good. She was human. Smart, available, small cracks of vulnerability. She'd be fun.

When they got to the car, Robin fired his lawyer, then had the driver drop him off at the law firm he'd just stopped retaining.

#

Kate, dressed in the yellow dress she'd bought, wound her way through the club. Justin was dressed in a bad suit and an ill-fitting grey t-shirt, which she'd try to ignore. She wondered what Ben would have worn, knowing he would have looked much nicer.

"Wow, Mr. Patrick, I am impressed," she said genuinely.

"Well, that was the goal," he said. Her face fell. She didn't want to be impressed, she wanted shared experiences. She wanted him to be there because he wanted to be there, not because it mattered to her.

"Can we get a photo of San Fran's next DA?" the photographer asked. Clearly not a local. Kate put a flower behind her right ear, indicating that she was available.

"Who said that?" Justin asked. He scooted closer to Kate.

"Together?" She said hesitantly.

"The handsome couple," the photographer said.

"I didn't know we were goin' . . . public," Kate said, uncomfortable.

"Oh, that'll be on the back page of the local section at best." Which would hurt Ben's feelings and probably piss Leo off more. Kate tried to keep it light because she did want to see Claudia, but had it been any other event, she'd probably have walked out. She'd done that more than once in the past, and she hated that Justin had her number so well. She felt trapped.

Before Kate could stew any longer, Claudia came out onto stage.

Justin said, "You want to meet her after?" The club owner Hugo was a friend.

"Oh, Justin, remind me to divorce you more often," she said, kissing him. She wasn't happy about the photo, but she'd be happy for now in Claudia's company.

After Claudia's set, Hugo came by to see how Justin and Kate were doing. "You didn't tell me your girl was so beautiful."

"No no no. I'm not," she pointed at Justin, "his girl."

"It's not official," Justin said.

Why did he keep doing that? Marking her out as his turf? She wasn't a square foot of grass. "It's a little more complicated than that, really." She wouldn't look at either Justin or Hugo, and then Hugo wanted to introduce the two of them to Claudia, so they followed him.

Kate fawned at Claudia, who recognized her as the lawyer Hugo was telling her about.

Claudia invited them to an after party. Kate said, "We'd love to." Then Justin stammered out a string of excuses. Kate tugged on his lapels. "You're so close to being cool."

Justin relented, "All right, we're in."

Kate was outwardly cheerful, but resented that she had to push that hard. Always.

They followed the group into Claudia's limo, where Claudia was having drinks poured for everyone. Kate asked for a double for herself.

Justin said, "No no, I'm good."

Claudia offered a drink to Justin, "He needs to unwind."

Kate said, "He loves to unwind. Absolutely. Make his a double too."

Justin whined. "Come on." He took the glass and stared at it.

Claudia asked Justin and Kate, "So how long have you been together?"

After an awkwardly competing narrative, Justin said they were back together, and Kate wanted to elbow him. She corrected him, and said, "We are dating."

Claudia said, "Life is complicated, huh?"

Meanwhile, someone else in the limo was lighting up a joint, and Justin started objecting as an officer of the court. At that moment, the limousine was sideswiped, and the white car that ran into them drove off. A hit and run. The police showed up, and Claudia was arrested.

Great. Exactly how Kate wanted to spend her evening.

Every moment from then on made Kate even more annoyed. Finally, she went to Lauren's and woke Lauren up to tell her about the night gone wrong. As Justin's campaign lawyer, she needed to know.

Lauren made tea for the two of them, and they sat in the living room in their bathrobes talking.

"You seem upset about Claudia, but not about Justin. What's up with that?"

"Justin can take care of himself," she said. "Claudia's in a foreign country."

"That's not all there is."

"No. Justin pissed me the hell off."

"What's going on, Kate?"

Kate waved her hand and then a tear fell down her cheek. "It's a thousand little things."

"Kate, I know we're not best friends and I'm certainly not your biggest fan, but I've been wondering this for years. Why do you keep going back for more from that man?"

"What do you mean?"

"After how he treated you during the pregnancy scare, I'm surprised you even speak to him outside of work."

Kate gawked. She'd never told Lauren some of the details of that. "How did you know?"

"It's my job to know, Kate. I do care, you know."

Kate surprised herself and hugged Lauren.

#

Ben's phone rang at 6 a.m. with Lauren telling him what was up with Justin and Kate. He got dressed in a dark grey suit, white shirt, and one of his favorite purple ties and pocket squares and headed into the office. He picked up a lovely purple tulip for Kate and one for himself from a street vendor a few doors from the office, changed her flower in her vase and his own.

Ben grabbed the paper off Leo's desk and walked into the conference room holding it up. "Here's the happy couple. Aren't they adorable? Caption's cute, too." He dropped it on the table, showing Justin and Kate on the front page with the caption, "High on Love?" and a subtitle of "District Attorney Canidate Justin Patrick: Boy Scout or Party Boy?"

"That is not exactly buried on the back page," Kate scolded Justin.

"I realize that," Justin said defensively.

Lauren went into crisis management mode, ordering everyone around.

Kate started talking about Claudia. "She has no American representation."

Ben said, "Now there's a conflict of interest. You were in the car," gently reminding Kate that she couldn't be Claudia's counsel.

Kate pleaded with Lauren. "If we represent her, then at least we can control the situation. And I know how much you love control."

Lauren looked off in the distance for a minute, then turned to Ben. "You're the criminal and drugs guy."

"That doesn't sound like flattery," he said to Lauren. He turned to Kate. "She is being arraigned this morning." They discussed the details of her arraignment.

Lauren said to Ben, "Get her out on bail." Then, to Ben and Kate, "Work together." Justin's head turned, his curiosity piqued.

Kate and Ben erupted simultaneously with why they couldn't work together on this.

Lauren yelled at them. "Deck chairs. Ice. Go." Titanic. That's how Lauren was seeing it.

Kate and Ben left the conference room together. "I can get a cab," Kate said, fetching her jacket. Ben helped her into it.

"I'm driving us, Kate, we don't have that kind of time."

She stood there, not knowing what to say to him.

"This is work, Katie. We need to help Claudia. Focus." He really didn't want to dredge up the Justin stuff, nor did he want to be with her in the thick of it, but he was hoping he could show their teamwork like the Lea Farran case.

The meeting with Claudia was a bunch of crazy talk as far as Ben was concerned, complete with conspiracy theories. Ben stood up with his briefcase, frustrated.

"You need to believe me," Claudia said.

"No, I don't. I just need to represent you," Ben said.

"I believe you," Kate said.

#

Robin watched as Lauren entered the almost-empty restaurant, dressed in a daring and not very business-like black skirt suit with platform shoes and a briefbag. "Hello?"

"Tango started in the slums of Argentina," he said, walking toward her, "did you know that? One of the first dances where men and women faced each other. And there were no rules."

She smiled. "Is there a point where you're so rich, it doesn't matter what you say?"

"I was being fascinating."

She laughed.

"You don't want to know any more about the history of the tango."

"Maybe. After, hello, and sorry this place is so queerly deserted." She waved her hand awkwardly.

"I own it."

"Oh. So you just shut it down so I could drop off some papers."

He smiled slightly.

"That is exactly what you did," she said, flustered.

"The kitchen is still open," he said. "You free for lunch?"

After objecting, he smiled, and she agreed to stay.

He signed the paperwork. She asked if he wanted to have his attorney look them over first. "No, I trust you. And, uh, I fired my attorney just after our meeting."

She stared at him.

"Yes. It was your fault."

Lauren grinned a huge grin, and he would do anything to keep that smile on her face. "There," he said, "our business is done." He coaxed her into dessert so he could spend more time with this fascinating creature he'd just met.

#

Meanwhile, Kate and Ben were in court for Claudia's arraignment. They got Claudia out on bail, and Ben muttered about how the other ADA was trying to set this up to burn Justin as one of Davidson's minions.

"It's not your fault," Ben said to Kate, "you didn't plant the cocaine in her purse."

"No, but I did plant Justin in that car," she said.

Ben understood her expression from earlier. She felt incredibly guilty that her pleasure might cost Justin his career even though Justin bought the tickets.

"He's an adult, Katie. He did it for his own reasons, not because you forced him to."

"I manipulated him. More than once that evening. I even said to him that he was so close to being cool."

Ben snorted. "You wouldn't have to manipulate me, Katie."

She looked up at him and smiled slightly. "I know."

They got back into Ben's car. Before he started it up, she said, "Wait."

He looked at her, tilting his head.

She lifted her hand to his face and brushed his cheek gently, then ran her fingers through his hair. He smiled at her and didn't stop her, but didn't encourage her, either. When it went on just long enough to feel awkward given her recent date with Justin and its fallout, he spoke. "C'mon Katie, Claudia needs us." He started the car, and she dropped her hand, smiling.

#

Kate and Ben arrived at her office only to find Justin going through her record collection. Kate and Justin talked about the proper owner of the record collection.

Ben interrupted their moment. "So, who's this Barber guy, he's coming after you hard."

Justin arguee that he's a friend, and Kate pointed out she's never mentioned Barber.

"We're you and Ben," Justin said to Kate.

Ben lifted his coffee cup and said on Kate's side so only she could hear, "From your lips to my imagination." Kate looked at him, lips opening in surprise and shock, but she said nothing.

Justin kept arguing for Ben and Kate to plead it down, but Kate wanted the charges gone within a week. She was completely frustrated with Justin, but she had to put up with him right now.

Justin said, "I'm going to go get some air." Much to her embarrassment, he kissed her on the cheek. Ben looked down; Kate saw that from the corner of her eye.

Looking at Ben's expression, Kate asked, "Oh, what?"

A slight smile crossed Ben's face, and he said, "You two make a cute political couple."

Kate sighed a heavy sigh.

"No, I mean it, I'm happy for you." She didn't believe that for a minute, but the look was sincere.

Kate, frustrated, said, "We are _not_ a couple." How many times was she going to have to say that to people, most of all Justin?

Ben said, "I was being nice. Don't treat me like a fool."

He walked out of Kate's office, saying, "Where the hell's Lauren?"

For a full minute, Kate stood there, shocked. Ben was writing her off because of Justin. That needed not to happen. And where the hell _was_ Lauren, anyway?

#

Robin had talked Lauren into a second dessert after the crême brulée, but he could tell he wouldn't be successful with a third. He was enjoying her company far too much to let her go so quickly.

She talked about why she loved Singing in the Rain so much, her love of problem-solving and damage control, and what she'd learned from the film. She smiled radiantly, but that line of inquiry was over.

"Do you dance?" he asked.

"Uh, dance. Yeah."

"Do you like Peggy Lee?"

"Not if you've paid to bring her back from the dead," she teased.

He put on music. "Come on." He smiled.

"You want to dance now," she said, laughing.

That was kind of the point of being a billionaire, wasn't it? He wasn't going to say that, though. His smile talked her into it. Then she balked, thinking he might have given her the asking price so he could win her company, but he told her she'd been taken. His plan was to sell the airline in a week for twice as much money. Then, freed from his hidden agenda, he kissed her.

He'd kissed a lot of women, and he could kiss pretty much any one he wanted to, but few impressed the way Lauren did. She was smart. She knew how to use her charms, and she was single. Free to be his.

#

Ben and Kate went to Barber's office trying to negotiate on behalf of Claudia, but he was unreasonable. The DA's office had nothing to offer, because the longer it was in the news, the more it hurt Justin's chances in the election, and Barber was under DA Davidson's thumb.

After Barber left with no offered deal and announcing they'd go to trial, Ben said, "They're going to treat her like she blew up an orphanage field trip to an animal shelter."

"We can't let this happen."

"If you want to save Claudia, we've got to come up with a story that a jury will believe."

They argued a bit, then he got into the elevator behind her. She was shaking with rage.

He put his hand on her back to calm her. "I'm good at this, Katie. We'll work on this together."

She looked up at him, dark eyes wounded by fear.

"Relax, Katie. Breathe."

#

When Kate returned to the office, she, Ben, and Leo started trying out different stories. They worked through several angles, especially blaming Antonio, Claudia's ex. Ben thought that was the best option and argued for it, but Claudia didn't like blaming Antonio as she thought he was innocent. "Could you do that to a friend?" she asked Kate.

Kate returned to the office to talk to Ben, and mentioned that maybe there were surveillance cameras to show that the accident was staged.

Ben replied, "Show me that the white SUV was outside the club before you left, and I might believe you." He smiled, holding up his pen.

Not too much later, Kate had sifted through all the surveillance cameras and showed Ben a picture. "The white SUV was outside the club, and it did follow us."

"So you do care what I think," he said, smiling.

"Only when you're wrong," she quipped.

She pointed out that the picture also had the plates, and that Leo had tracked down the driver's name and address. Ben drove them to City Hall to meet up with the ADA.

"No no no, I'm not going to give him a deal unless he talks," Justin said when presented with the fact of a witness.

"Hey, it's your campaign we're trying to save, here, Puff the Magic Dragon," Ben said to Justin.

Despite himself and the gravity of his situation, Justin smiled, even while Kate kept telling him to listen to Ben.

The three of them went into the conference room to talk to the witness.

After the witness fingered Antonio, Claudia's ex, Ben said, "Antonio did it. See, even when I'm lying, I'm telling the truth."

Kate asked why, and the witness said there was another man.

Justin said, "There's always another man."

Kate turned to him and stared for several seconds. Ben tried very hard not to smile visibly. He almost succeeded.

With the new information and a sworn affidavit from the witness, Ben and Kate approached Barber to see if he could call off Claudia's case.

Ben asked, "Does the city wish to continue with Claudia's trial in light of this new information?"

Barber said, "I can't make that determination."

Kate said, "Say hi to your nuts for me," then asked how it felt to betray Justin.

Barber said, "Screw you."

Kate retorted, "Not enough booze in the world."

After he walked away, Ben said, sadly, "You picked the wrong horse, buddy." He paused. "Happens to the best of us." He bit into his biscotti as Kate stared at him and turned away slightly.

"Is that what you think?" She asked.

Ben pressed his lips together firmly and looked down.

A tear rolled down her cheek, but he didn't see it until he regained control enough to look at her again. This time, he didn't brush it away with his thumb. It was time she knew how much he was hurting.

#

Robin, realizing that he'd screwed up, showed up at Lauren's office to apologize to her.

"I haven't spoken to my son in over ten years. It's . . . complicated."

"That's exactly what I did not want to hear. I understand complicated. That's what I do. That's what I am. But damn, I'd love simple."

She ended it.

Robin couldn't believe it. "You're bowing out."

She converted from flustered lover to professional lawyer in less than thirty seconds and asked him to leave. He stood there, stunned, then walked out of her office.

Crushed, he turned around, took her hands in his, and said, gently, "I hope you find what you're looking for."

They looked at each other a moment too long, and he could tell she was hurting just as much as he was. He needed to find a way into her heart.

He turned back, frustrated.

"No, you know, I don't. Because you don't know how this turns out, up to and including this moment." He paused dramatically. "Neither do I."

#

Despite Barber's reluctance, Claudia was freed. Kate gave Ben a big hug in the office, which he returned with cautious indulgence.

The two of them plus Justin were invited to a small concert Claudia was performing for them tonight, but Ben had to go pick up Claudia's passport so she could leave the country the next morning.

Kate took a cab to the auditorium, meeting Justin there. She looked around for Ben.

Claudia asked Justin and Kate to sit through a song while they waited for Ben to return. Justin didn't even make it halfway through the piece before checking his phone for something completely stupid and inappropriate.

Kate sighed and moved slightly away from him, though the seats did not permit a lot of distance.

A minute later, she heard someone behind her, and Ben gave her a huge smile as he showed her the passport and sat behind her. She smiled warmly at Ben. As her head turned back to Justin, the smile got cooler and cooler until there was no smile at all.

When the song finished, Justin said, "I have a ton of work to do."

"I'll see you tomorrow," Kate said to him, then walked to the stage to talk to Claudia, evading Justin's embrace.

Ben joined Kate in front of the stage, pulling three CDs out of his coat pocket.

Claudia looked at Kate, then Ben, then back at Kate, then smiled.

"I see."

"What?" Kate asked.

"Why you were so uncomfortable during my concert - and afterward - the other night."

Ben smiled.

"Do you trust me?" Claudia asked Kate.

"Yes."

"Then kiss him like it's the last kiss you'll ever have."

Kate blushed, but moved toward Ben and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Ben handed Claudia the CDs to autograph, not taking his eyes off of Kate.

"Kiss me," he whispered, brushing his nose against hers.

She leaned in tentatively, still embarrassed, but pressed her lips to his, teasing his lips apart. Finally, he joined in as an active participant, wrapping his arms around her, claiming her with his lips and tongue, and ignoring the fact that people were staring at them.

When he was done, Kate pulled away, looked quickly at Claudia, and ran out of the auditorium.

She walked for blocks before she settled on a plan. She needed the crisp night air right now.

_Follow Your Heart_ had been the English name of the song. If only her heart had a clear path to follow.

#

Ben stared after Kate, then looked at Claudia.

"She loves you, you know."

"I don't think she knows that."

"She will."

Ben gave instructions for autographing, then said goodnight to Claudia and drove to the office. When he arrived, he put one of the signed CDs on Kate's desk.


	9. Chapter 9: Force Majeure, pt 2

**a/n: Oh, Katie, what could _possibly_ go wrong?**

Kate walked back to the office where she was pretty sure Ben would be working late.

She heard the music as soon as the elevator doors opened. Tango, something she actually knew how to dance thanks to her gay high school boyfriend who loved to dance. She slunk into Ben's office with her moves, and Ben looked up. His serious face immediately broke into a grin.

"Oh, Katie," he said and her heart leaped. He'd not been calling her that as frequently since Tahoe, and she missed it. He stood and walked over to her.

"Not catwoman?" she teased.

He held out his hand to her. "Dance with me."

"I thought we were just colleagues," she said, bitterness in the edge of her voice, echoes of his insult earlier in the day.

Ben tried to keep his face cheerfully neutal. "Colleagues dance."

"They don't usually dance the tango."

"The tango is a dance of loneliness, and I've been a lonely man." He smiled and tilted his head, a look he knew she found hard to resist. His brown eyes smouldered with need, and she felt herself drawn to him despite the butterflies in her stomach.

She closed the distance between them, taking his hand. He leaned slightly forward to cue his intent, then wrapped his arm around her in apilado, and she wrapped her arm around his shoulders. His smell of sandalwood and lime overwhelmed her, reminding her of their nights together. She followed as he led her through a bunch of basic tango moves she dredged up from dance lessons long ago. Then, assured she knew the basics, he started leading her into more complex variations slowly.

He spun her and she rested for a moment, her back to his chest, his arms crossed around her, then he leaned down to kiss her neck.

"Unfair," she protested weakly.

"Do you mind?" he whispered, teasing.

She sighed happily.

He ran his nose up the side of her neck, then nibbled her earlobe. "I like dancing with you," he whispered.

"That's why we're just standing here, not dancing, with you taking advantage of me," she teased.

Kate began to feel more confident with the old moves, trying ochos as Ben gave her room for footwork and she got more into the tune. She felt bolder, more flirtatious, caressing his leg with hers. Moments later, he stretched his knee out, and she straddled it, facing him, in a sentada pose. His eyes smouldered, and she stayed there a moment too long, lingering.

Ben brushed his lips against hers, then lowered his arm to her waist. She lifted her right arm and bent over backwards, pressing her hips up against his, heat against heat. He guided her back up slowly, kissing upward from mid-chest to her throat and finally her lips. Finally, he released her leg carefully so that the movement could continue, but she was a bit weak in the knees from that last move.

She said nothing, but let him lead her, his next big move being a controlled drop, something she loved. Just as she was almost at the bottom, though, her balance went all funny and she dropped to the floor, landing on her butt.

#

Ben panicked, holding her shoulder and head just enough so they didn't hit the floor with her lower body, but knew what he was supposed to do. Prop her legs up, which was easiest on the couch. It wasn't easy to lift dead weight, but he was glad for the time he spent at the gym. It took longer than he liked, but he put her leg up on the couch arms and grabbed one of the pillows for underneath her butt, all designed to get more blood to her heart and head faster.

He checked to make sure she was breathing, which he probably should have checked on the floor. Airway seemed fine.

Since no one else was in the office, he left for the wet towels and water, hating to leave her alone for even a moment in case she needed him. He dared not hurry and trip, so he walked slower than he normally would.

By the time he returned, she was starting to recover. He put the cool wet towels on her forehead over her objection.

"What happened?" Ben took her pulse.

"You fainted." Lydia's teasing echoed through Ben's mind. _Ah, so they just fall at your feet without lubrication._ Followed by his response, _My cross to bear._ It didn't seem so funny, now.

"Last thing I remember was dancing."

"That's when you fainted."

"I remember kissing."

"Mmmhmm. Can I get you to sip some water?"

Over the course of a couple of minutes, she drank half the water. That was probably enough for now, but he poured the rest into a spare water bottle in his desk.

"Are you able to sit up?"

"Oh, I'm fine," she said, sitting up a little too quickly.

"Whoa, Katie," he said as she was clearly still a bit woozy. He fetched her jacket and his own, helped her with hers. He then removed her shoes, and fetched her purse, which he slung over his shoulder.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"I'm taking you home, tiger."

"Okay," she said. The elevator opened and they stepped inside. When it opened again in the garage, Ben picked her up and carried her in his arms until he reached his car, unlocked it with a remote and gently slipped her into the passenger seat. He put her bag and her shoes in between her feet and lowered the seat to help with blood flow to her brain.

He said he was taking her home, but he'd lied. He knew she wouldn't get in the car if he had been honest and told her they were going to the emergency room.

When they pulled up in front of the emergency room, she figured it out and she was furious.

"Oh no." She looked away from both Ben and the hospital.

"You're going to get this checked out," he insisted.

"Benedict Yancy Grogan, I hate hospitals." She really was furious, he could tell by the use of his full name.

He reached out to hold her hand. "Katie, please look at me." After a couple of moments, she turned toward him. "Everyone who doesn't work in a hospital hates them. Well, except for ambulance-chasing lawyers," he joked. "But there are serious possible causes of fainting, and I'd never forgive myself if something was missed and that something killed you. The idea of living in a world without you is too painful to contemplate. So even if you don't go for yourself, go for me."

She protested a while longer and finally gave into the stern and worried look on his face. "One condition. You don't call anyone else. No. One. Else."

"Okay, but what if they need next-of-kin because you're unconscious? Or worse?"

She smiled and touched his face with her free hand. "Call me the name you most want to."

It took a moment for him to understand what she was asking. "You want me to pretend to be your husband and not tell anyone else? Not even Lauren? Or your brother? Or Justin? Or Leo?"

"Please?"

There were a thousand ways this could go pear-shaped. He sighed. "I'll be by your side the whole time, Katie." It was a horrible way to get some small part of his wish.

When she couldn't find her medical card, Ben pulled out his for the employer plan number so they could look hers up, and he filled in the parts of her admission form that he knew, then handed the form to her for the rest. Then he gave his black Amex for the uncovered charges and signed the slip.

The door between the waiting room and main ER corridor opened, and Ben saw a former client. "Dr. Moorthi!" he said, and the doctor spun around just as the door was closing.

"Ben!" He opened the door. "Are you my patient?"

"No. I'm afraid my wife is, though."

The doctor looked at Ben, then Kate. "Same last name?"

Kate said, "Reed."

"I'll try to get you in quickly, Ms. Reed," he said to her.

A couple of minutes later, Kate and Ben were ushered in and Ben was left to sit outside the exam room for a couple of minutes. Dr. Moorthi came by again and said, "I didn't know you'd gotten married," a gentle chiding about the lack of invitations, Ben suspected.

"We eloped, actually."

"The most common causes of fainting are low blood pressure and dehydration, sometimes extreme sleep deprivation can cause it, too. And, of course, there are far more serious reasons we need to rule out."

"I know, that's why I brought her. She's not really a willing patient," Ben admitted. "Oh, I took her pulse when this first happened," he looked at his watch, "eighteen minutes ago was when I took it, probably two minutes before that when it occurred."

"So what happened immediately before that?"

"We were dancing. Tango."

"In a club?"

"No, in my office. Well, we both work there, but it was my office specifically."

"Hot or crowded?"

"Neither." Ben smiled slightly. It had been hot all right, but not in the way Dr. Moorthi meant.

"Dancing for how long?"

"We were on the second full song, so somewhere between five and ten minutes."

"She sleep deprived, ill, or dehydrated?"

"I don't know about sleep deprived - I'd been out of town for work for several days," he lied, trying to cover for not knowing her sleeping habits at all, "but possibly dehydrated. She drinks coffee and rarely drinks water."

"No hyperventilation?"

"None."

"Okay, well, we'll put her through the usual battery of tests. As you probably know, we need to rule out heart issues or neurological causes, so it's a truly annoying set of tests. She'll probably be here overnight."

"I'll be here with her."

"Ahh, I see the nurse has indicated your wife's changed and ready, so I'm going to go in and ask her the same set of questions now. When someone faints, we usually like to get at least two accounts, though. Give us a few minutes and we'll let you in to see her."

"Thank you. I can't wait to see my wife again." The words felt so strange, yet so comfortable.

After what seemed an interminably long time, they let him in to sit with Kate. She was crying, so he took a few tissues and dabbed at her eyes then held her hand.

"I'm scared, Ben."

"I know, love." He smiled, as now he got to use all the scary words he'd wanted to use, and he got to use them because she'd asked him to.

"Thanks for being here, hubby," she teased.

He kissed her on the lips and said, "Anything for my wife." Despite the situation, he grinned.

He sat back in the provided chair, holding her hand, smirking at the incredulity of it all.

When they took her away for tests, he reassured his temporary wife that he'd be there for her when she got back.

He pulled out his iPad for some mindless distraction, reading web pages he'd saved for later, catching up on news he'd missed, and played a few games. He tried to read some work-related documents, but his heart wasn't in it. He was worried about Katie.

By four in the morning, they'd run Katie through the round of tests, had her on an IV with electrolytes, and released her back to Ben with a set of follow-up appointments if needed. Ben entered them into his planner so that he would make sure she'd follow up. The look of relief on her face was palpable.

When they got in the car, he looked at her.

"Ben," she said softly, "I don't want to go to Lauren's at this hour."

It was a long way to his place from the hospital, and he didn't want to be disturbed in the morning by his landline when Lauren wanted the usual morning rah-rah talk, even though it would be Saturday. "Where would you like to go?"

She didn't answer.

"There will be a veil of mystery over my place while you're still with Justin, Katie. I can take you to a hotel if you don't have another place to stay."

"Will you spend the night?"

Ben looked at her, not quite knowing what to say.


	10. Chapter 10: Force Majeure, pt 3

**a/n: In which I give an alternate explanation for how Ben might know Kate likes terraces.**

Ben sat in his car staring at Kate.

She said, "You _actually_ made me swoon earlier, and you acted like a worried husband half the night. Please stay with me as my husband for the rest of the night. You definitely earned the privilege."

What a way to tug at his heart. This was such a bad idea, a pale shadow of what he actually wanted. Still, he had to admire her tactics. Despite himself, he grinned. "You, my dear wife, are deeply into playing unfair."

"I learned from the best." She smirked and tilted her head, mocking his favorite gesture.

He laughed and kissed her, trying not to linger too long. He wanted to get to a room. Soon. Not just because she'd just twisted his heart and privates into doing her bidding, but because they were both truly exhausted. He wanted to crash in a bed, not crash his Aston Martin.

Ben called his favorite local hotel to reserve a suite before they arrived, then drove to the Fairmont, leaving the car with the valet. He held out his arm for her, which she took, and they walked into the Fairmont's lobby, with its fabulous white marble floors and gilt ceiling - a beaux arts showcase built around the time of the great earthquake. Ben walked up to the counter, collected the keys, and led Kate to their room. He hung their coats when they entered the room, and she gasped at how nice the room was.

"It has a terrace," he pointed out.

She opened the draperies and French doors and stepped out into the late night. She giggled with delight. "Can we have breakfast out here?"

"Of course, my dear wife. Until then, I have other plans for you," he said possessively.

"Like?"

"Shower, sex, sleep, breakfast. Or shower, sex, sleep, sex, shower, breakfast. Your choice. I do want the hospital smell out of my nose, though."

Kate tore herself away from the view and closed the French doors. "I want an apartment just like this," she said. She bounced up and down. "I love it, thank you sweetie." She kissed him passionately, and her enthusiasm was infectious despite their exhaustion. He unzipped her dress as he opened his lips to hers, tongue tracing the contours of her mouth. He slid it down off her shoulders, then helped her out of it, revealing a rather boring cotton pink bra and matching cotton briefs.

"Wow, you really dress down for Justin, don't you?"

"I wasn't dressing for Justin."

He gave her a look.

"Okay, you're right. The thong was-" She stopped.

He tilted his head and raised an eyebrow expectantly, but she wouldn't clarify.

Within a couple of minutes they'd each stripped each other naked and were in the shower lathering each other.

They dried off quickly and incompletely. Ben carried her to bed, stopping for some condoms out of his resupplied briefcase. He licked a stray drop of water from her breast, lowered her onto the bed, then got into bed beside her.

He said, "First, I ask for one rule. Anything said here stays here, and anything done here, stays here. We are role playing. Whatever either of us feel like in the moment - is fine, so long as it isn't intended to hurt anyone. Agreed?"

"Agreed."

"Then turn your ringer off. I've already turned mine off. I want to sleep in."

"Katherine Reed Grogan?"

"Yes, Benedict Yancy Grogan?"

"Would you permit me the honor of making love to my wife?"

"Only if you permit me the honor of making love to my husband."

"I'm exhausted and drained from the stress, so forgive me if I'm not up to last time."

"_You're_ exhausted. You didn't have some hot man in the office literally make you swoon because he swept you off your feet."

Ben grinned, placed a pillow underneath her bottom, and kissed her all over, spiraling inward toward her clit, using his tongue to make her squirm with pleasure all over. He was gentle, but unforgiving, sensing every movement that caused her pleasure and doing more of that, hands worshipping every part of her they could reach.

She let out a wordless cry, shuddering underneath him.

When she was ready for more, he crawled up her body to kiss her, donned a condom and slid inside her.

"A game. You can ask anything, but any answer you give has to be true - and complete. We alternate, and you get to go first. We stop when both parties come."

She smiled. "Sounds like fun. Hmm. You said you didn't know how many women you'd had one-night stands with. Are we talking dozens or hundreds?"

Well, he'd asked for tha tline of inquiry, hadn't he? "Two dozen, maybe three. About one a month when I wasn't otherwise involved, generally the night I won a case or a big settlement. Sorry, that's as accurate as I can be."

She didn't look as shocked as he'd expected, nor did she seem any less aroused as he thrust into her. Finally, she spoke. "Not as bad as I feared. Your question?"

"You said that if we'd gone to bed together that first night, you'd have been intrigued, but also grossed out. My question is: why grossed out?"

He felt the thrill down her body as she reacted to the question, and her nipples became suddenly erect against his chest. "I had a brief flash of things I'd be doing with you, and then when I got scared that I'd spend the night actually doing them, I told you 'too late.'"

"More complete answer, then: what did you imagine?" Her arousal increased, her breathing harder.

"Do we have to do this?" she asked.

"Don't you want your husband to know your fantasies about him?" Ben asked, tilting his head and smiling as he continued thrusting rhythmically. He put his lips next to her ear and whispered, "Teach me how to pleasure you, love."

She shuddered around him. "The first image was of me crawling across a shag carpet wearing nothing but a thong and black patent pumps with you in hot pursuit. I'm not that kind of girl."

Ben chuckled evilly as he imagined the scenario. "And the second?"

"You bending me over the couch."

"Mmm, that sounds like fun, too," he said, "Were there more?"

"Me on top, you on top with me tied to the bed, and the last one was standing with one leg straight up. I don't think I can actually do that one, though."

Ben teased, "Hmm, you imagined sex with me five different ways in just that short bit of time? That's a lot to live up to."

She snorted. "You'd have managed somehow."

"True." He grinned. "So what grossed you out about that?"

She looked away. "That I wanted that much from you right then. And that much variety."

"Don't be embarrassed, Katie. I know you did, I saw it in your face, and I'm happy to provide."

"And I thought you were far more shallow than you actually are, and that I wanted someone I perceived as being that shallow."

"Fair enough. Your question?"

"Why didn't you take me that night?" Her voice cracked, filled with frustration.

"Because when I asked if truth was the way to your heart, I wanted your heart far more than a one-night stand." He turned her head to look at him. "I still do, my wife. Besides, if I had, you'd never have seen me as anything other than shallow, right?"

She nodded.

He asked, "My question: which did you fantasize about the most?"

She looked at him, moving underneath him as he thrust into her, blushing slowly but not saying a word. "The first one," she finally whispered.

He whispered in her ear, "So you may not be that kind of girl, but you definitely _are_ that kind of woman. And that's what the thong was about." She blushed a deeper red, and he kissed her. "Filing that away for future reference. Your question."

"Still carrying the torch for anyone?" she asked,

"Only for you, love. I did carry a couple for a while, but they genuinely seem gone. How about your torches?" he asked.

"Just you and Justin." That stung a little to hear, but this was about honesty. "Sorry," she said. "When was the last time you had sex, apart from me?"

"I haven't been on a date or had sex with anyone since about a month before I met you."

"Really?" She looked surprised.

"Really. Anything interesting you'd like to do in bed?"

"I want you to tie me up." A thrill went through him at the image that came to mind. He moved her hands into his, then leaned on them as he thrust into her, pinning her underneath him.

Ben purred. "I'd like that. Silk or leather?"

She smiled as he thrust into her, harder than before. "Silk first, I think. Ever been tied up?"

"Yes, that's how I know I don't like handcuffs." Ugh. Lydia. "You?"

She said, "I don't like handcuffs either." The sour look on her face told Ben it was a sorer subject than that. "Never tried anything else, but silk sounds . . . possible. Your turn: why haven't you dated anyone since then?"

"I met someone. Smart, sexy, gorgeous. Haven't wanted anyone else, so I turned down other offers. Dating anyone else wouldn't be fair to either me or them, let alone you. Your question: how do you feel about me?"

Kate stared at him, unable to speak for almost a minute. Moments passed as they moved together, her arousal building.

"You are the most infuriating man I've ever met."

Ben chuckled. "So. I've. Been. Told. But that was not a complete and truthful answer, love."

"I-" she said, but suddenly started to writhe. "Ohhh." He felt the beginning of her climax.

"Let it out, Katie."

"Ben?"

"Mmmm?"

"I love you," she whispered. She began to peak, digging into his back with her short nails.

"I didn't quite hear that," he teased, knowing perfectly well what she'd said.

"I love you!" Just then, she climaxed, digging in farther as she pulled him further inside. The pain was exquisite, and he was not into pain.

"I love you too, Katie." He was completely lost inside her as he came.

He held his temporary wife, stroking her gently, unable to say anything. Eventually, he rolled over next to her and curled up in her arms, his forehead nestled between her breasts.

#

Kate held Ben, unable to sleep despite her exhaustion. She was more confused than ever, never having been in love with two people at once before.

She had kinda cheated on Justin, the one thing she thought she could never do. She hadn't succumbed to Ben's charms, she'd more or less seduced him. Twice. The first time, she and Justin hadn't had an arrangement, which Kate had actually confirmed right before her trip with Ben. So that wasn't cheating in her book.

None of the explicit agreements had changed, but she and Justin were really more on than off now and she knew he expected exclusivity from her even though he'd suggested she date other people months ago. But that was when he was seeing Susan, back when Kate and Ben had seen them together in the bar.

After Tahoe, though, Justin had wanted to make promises. He wanted to move back in together, had almost convinced her that was a good idea, especially for his campaign. Yet, here she was in bed with Ben again.

Pretending to be married, no less.

The interaction with Dr. Moorthi was so strange earlier. He'd obviously been such a fan of Ben, it was kind of endearing. Neither the doctor nor Ben had said what kind of malpractice case Ben had represented him for, but it was clear that Ben felt comfortable putting her in his hands.

While they were there, Dr. Moorthi took her aside to point out that some women fainted during pregnancy, and he recommended a pregnancy test, but wanted to offer that to her privately. She accepted, partly because not accepting would have been strange in context, and tests verified that she wasn't pregnant. Kate was then somewhat disappointed, just like the last time, when Justin told her she was all Christmas and bombs. Not that she wanted to be pregnant while sleeping with two men - definitely not, but it reminded her that she did want kids at some point, something that had become so distant since Justin's rejection.

Dr. Moorthi had recommended she get on that fairly soon if that's what she did want, that it'd be harder to have a viable pregnancy every year from here on out. So not helping her current state of mind.

She wasn't surprised she wasn't pregnant - she'd been on the pill for years, and she and Justin hadn't had sex that many times recently. She and Ben had only spent one night together before the hospital visit and they'd used condoms. Ben had never asked if she was on the pill, he'd just taken responsibility for safe sex.

Kate definitely didn't want to have kids with Justin. That wound wasn't gone, not at all, not how he was willing to stay together for a baby, but have nothing to do with her when she turned out not to be pregnant. No, they'd have split up and he'd have taken her baby, too. Then she'd have no father, no mother, no husband, and little to do with her own child for eighteen years.

Now, with Ben, she had someone who clearly wanted to marry her, though they hadn't discussed kids. He was another partner in the firm, and her share had increased from a quarter to a third when Ben bought into the company and Ben had bought Spencer out. In many ways, going back to Justin felt like contracting her horizons, and being with Ben felt like expanding them. Neither was easy or comfortable.

Worse, she felt she should feel guilty about the current situation and her cheating - but she didn't.

She stroked Ben's back, which is when she felt something wet and looked at her hand. Something dark. Blood?

"Ben?"

"Mmm?" He woke up.

"Are you bleeding?"

He rolled over and she saw three long scratch marks she'd made on his back. "Oh my God, Ben, I'm so sorry." She ran into the bathroom and got some cotton balls out of the cup, wiping his gash. "I think you need something more than this," she said.

"Let me see," he said, walking over to the bathroom. Kate was still freaking out, but Ben chuckled as he looked in the mirror. "Oh, nicely done, tiger. I think you've earned that nickname now. Also, Catwoman."

She stood in front of him, furious. "This is serious. You're _bleeding_."

"Katie, it's not going to kill me. I'll just call down to the front desk."

"Really?"

He offered her the hotel bathrobe, then donned his paisley silk boxers and called down to the front desk. A few minutes later, gauze, medical tape, and a small packet of antibiotic were delivered.

"Darling, would you help put this on?" he asked, and Katie ministered to him. After the bandage was finished, she kissed his back and slipped out of her robe. He pulled off his boxers and got back into bed facing her.

"Why aren't you freaked out about this?" Kate asked. "I would be."

"Katie, it's a common male fantasy for a man to be good enough in bed that something like this happens. I'm amused more than anything else. Here we are, living your one-night fantasy that I'm your husband, and you've possibly marked me for life." He curled up the way he had been, forehead between her breasts. "G'night, Mrs. Reed-Grogan."

"G'night Mr. Grogan."

"Reed-Grogan," he said.

"G'night Mr. Reed-Grogan."

Within a handful of minutes, Ben was asleep.

She stroked Ben's hair as he slept. She knew he was the bright shiny boy in her life, but would that feeling last? It had been so long ago when Justin was a new love that she really couldn't remember details of how she felt day-to-day, only remembering that love had definitely faded not only for Justin, but for her.

Faded too much? She wasn't sure yet, nor was she sure that her feelings for Ben wouldn't fade, either. Relationships changed, though, that she was certain of.

She kissed Ben gently, then settled down and fell asleep with her arms around him.

#

Ben woke to the sun shining in his face like he was in an interrogation chamber, momentarily disoriented. The sun didn't come into his room that way, the sheets underneath him were cotton instead of silk, and. . . .

He turned, only to see Katie lying there next to him. Last night was coming back to him: the concert, Kate coming to the office, their tango, Kate fainting, him taking her to the hospital and her insisting on acting as his wife, and then, the hotel. Here.

Followed by mad, passionate twenty questions sex and the coaxed admission that she loved him.

For the first moment after he'd woken, he thought it was only a dream, but here she was. He'd just made things a thousand times worse, he suspected, but if he was going to live in hell until she decided, he might as well enjoy the trip.

Lips pressing against hers, stroking her back, he woke Kate up. She stretched, cat-like, without opening her eyes. "Mmmm."

"Good morning, sunshine," he said. "What would you like for breakfast?"

She smiled dreamily. "The usual."

"You want to tell the person who hasn't been married to you yet? Eggs, fried over easy, and coffee, I expect, but what else?"

Her eyes opened, startled. "Sausage, orange juice. You." She turned toward hin and caressed his leg with her own.

"I'll order all but the last from room service, and personally deliver that last item to you. You might want to think about how you want the delivery packaged while I'm on the phone."

He called room service and began placing the order when Kate gestured him to move to the middle of the bed. Ben moved while placing the order. She sat on his thighs and reached over for a condom, rubbing his chest and stomach while he was trying to talk. Ben completed the call, but his words got more awkwardly spaced as the call progressed.

"You know what I want most from my husband this morning?"

He smiled. "Maybe you'd better tell me. I might be mistaken, love."

She slid her hips up almost to his waist, then slid down so she could position his cock for entry, then slowly took him all in. "I want to fuck you senseless," she said. "Wanted to ever since that first night." _Just be who you are and take me._ Except she was doing the taking this time.

"You have special spousal privilege," he said. "Go for it," he said, cupping her breasts in his hands as she moved around him.

They peaked mere moments before room service arrived. Ben hurriedly donned the hotel's provided robe and helped Katie into hers. After room service set up breakfast on the terrace, Ben signed for a huge tip for the waiter, then hung the do not disturb sign.

He picked up the phone and confirmed the latest they could check out, surreptitiously took some photos of the room and one of Kate out on the terrace, then walked out to join her for breakfast. In addition to everything Kate had asked for, he'd ordered a bottle of champagne for them.

"Wow, this is really luxurious, Ben."

"Not bad for an impromptu honeymoon on extremely short notice if I do say so myself." They toasted each other and sipped champagne as they held each other's hand.

"Not bad at all," she acknowledged, holding up a piece of sausage for him to eat.

"Sausage, huh?" he teased, eating the piece off her fork.

She rolled her eyes.

They finished their breakfast at leisure, talking about world travel, law school, their families, and their favorite cases.

After, she led him into the shower, where they lathered and washed each other, Kate taking special care not to get the bandages wet.

"How much time do we have left?" Kate asked.

"About half an hour," he said sadly.

"Just hold me, then."

They curled up on the couch, just holding each other, Kate on the inside, Ben on the outside.

Ben said, "Do you know what I think of your reaction to my overtures that night we met?"

"Mmm? No."

"Justin's never been able to get under your skin enough to have great sex for you. You and I both have a skill, and that's getting under people's skin. You saw that potential in me, and it freed up your mind - and that scared you."

Kate lifted her leg and raised it over her head, resting it on Ben's shoulder. "Well, there's one question partly answered."

"Katherine Reed-Grogan, you are a cruel, cruel woman."

"Admit it, you love me."

"I do." He caressed her leg and kissed the back of her knee.

She looked at him for several minutes, then finally asked, "Would you really marry me?"

His stomach tied in knots from fear. "The thought terrifies me, given my history, but yes, yes I would. I definitely prefer a much shorter engagement, though. The long one I had - almost a year - was just nervewracking." He swallowed hard before he could voice the next question. "Would you really marry me?"

She lowered her leg. "You're serious?"

"Yes."

"I- I don't know." She clung to him. "Before Lake Tahoe, I'd have said no, or at least not on my horizon."

"And now?"

"We haven't been out on a date, really," she said, then covered her mouth with her hand. "I'm sorry, that's completely my fault, isn't it?"

Ben said, "Well, there was the dive bar, and I'd call this a date night insofar as you asked me to be here."

"Do you normally propose on the second date?" She teased.

"It's discussion, not a proposal. Do you normally take guys to hotels on your second dates?" He teased back.

She didn't answer, just stared off for a minute before changing the subject. "Marriage is so complicated for girls."

"Oh?"

"There's the whole dress ordeal, and the invitations, and the whole thing about the list of people one's supposed to invite, and then there's the shoes and the bridesmaid politics and who gets to sit where at the reception and it goes on and on and on."

"It's designed to create insanity, you know."

"So when you ask me: I don't want to go through all that again, even though I did enjoy parts of it."

"We can afford to hire a wedding planner, you know. I can unstuff all that cash from my heart and give it to the wedding planner so there will be more room for you, not to mention less stress."

"You're really serious."

"I have taken on some of the biggest companies anywhere and tucked millions of dollars into the bank, but I have never been more serious about anything. All I'm asking is that you really consider it."

"I will."

Ben's alarm went off, and Kate started to cry.

"Don't cry, lovely wife, just remember what good times we've had."

She clung to him.

"We need to go, tiger."

He brought over her leather-trimmed dress, and helped her put her clothes back on, then dressed himself. He grabbed a few tissues from the bathroon, and dried her eyes with one. He gave her a few; the rest he stuffed in his jacket pocket.

Ben spent several minutes caressing and kissing her at the hotel room door before they finally ventured forth.

They checked out, and with one long glance back by both of them, said goodbye to their temporary married life, walking hand in hand to his car.

"Names are complicated," she said before he started the car.

He tilted his head, started the car, and said, "Not if both parties change their names."

"Mmm?"

"Kate Reed-hyphen-Grogan. The hyphen is silent, of course. And Benedict Reed-hyphen-Grogan."

"Reed, Reed-Grogan, and Reed-Grogan? Katherine Moira Reed-Grogan? Too long. Now you know why I never use my middle name."

Ben smiled. "Not nearly as long as Benedict Yancy Reed-Grogan, though. Besides, the firm could suddenly become 'Reed-Archer, Reed-Grogan, and Reed-Grogan.' Or 'Archer, Reed-Grogan, and Reed-Grogan.' Either way, I tend to doubt Lauren will keep the Reed name alone when she remarries."

"I don't think she'll marry Archer. Justin pressured me to change my name more than once, but he didn't ever volunteer to take a blended name."

Ben shrugged. "That's Justin."

He pulled into Lauren's driveway, walked Kate to the door.

She turned to give him a hug, but didn't invite him in.

"I do love you," she said.

"I know," he replied with a smirk, raising his finger to her lips.

"So now you think you're Han Solo?"

He just smiled, tracing her lips with his finger. When she sighed softly, he broke contact and walked back to his car.

He made it two whole blocks before he pulled over so he could break down.


	11. Chapter 11: Force Majeure, pt 4

**a/n: Long chapter is long. Sorry about that. :) Not. :)**

**Chapter 11**

**Force Majeure, part 4**

After spending Friday night and most of Saturday with Ben, she dressed down in jeans and sneakers and spent the rest of the day alone in Golden Gate Park. After Justin called twice, she texted him to say she'd meet him Sunday afternoon, but she didn't really want to lose the feeling she'd had with Ben. She could almost feel him caressing her skin.

As the sunlight was beginning to fade, Kate got a phone call from someone who's number wasn't in her address book.

"Katherine Reed-Gr-" Crap.

"It's Spencer, no need for that kind of formality. I just have a personal cell line now."

"Hey," she said, not really knowing what else to say to her brother and flustered by her name blunder. "Long time no talk."

"Terri and I wanted to know if you wanted to come over for dinner. I've got extras to go around." Kate felt palpable relief and accepted.

She took a cab to their place, a small white house in North Beach, and got out. Spence already had the door open for her, and she went inside.

"I'd forgotten how much I liked your place," she said, turning a corner. The living room egress out the back had been modified to have a huge terrace. "Look at this awesome terrace," she said, then her feelings hit her like a ton of bricks. Even though the terrace looked nothing like that at the Fairmont, the sorrow of leaving Ben earlier remained.

She doubled over in pain.

"Kate!" Spencer said.

Terri said, "You go out there and talk to Kate, I'll take care of the rest. Let me know when you're done and we'll eat then."

"Thanks, babe." Spencer kissed his wife.

It had been a super-long time since they'd talked like this, and Kate didn't know where to start. "Spence. . . ."

"Last time it was Justin troubles. I know your divorce was final, so what's up now?"

Kate flailed with her hands. "I made it all worse and now I'm more confused."

He asked, "So did you actually elope? I heard a rumor of that this morning."

Kate's head snapped up. "You heard _what_?" She could feel all the heat of the universe concentrating on her face.

"I heard you eloped. With Ben Grogan. And I couldn't help but notice how you answered the phone."

Kate thought back. Over the course of the evening, there were probably a dozen or so people who might have heard that exchange between Ben and the doctor. The triage rooms offered no acoustic privacy at all.

"I was in the emergency room last night, and Ben drove me. Insisted I go, actually. I didn't want to be alone, but I didn't want anyone else involved. Please tell me Lauren doesn't know."

"She didn't hear it from me, nor I from her. So Ben's the new guy."

Kate sighed. "Attorney-client privilege?"

"Still a bar member, and if you clean up the dishes after, we'll call that valuable consideration."

"Ben's the new guy."

"You know he was opposing counsel on a case I worked on, right?"

"No, when?"

"About three years ago. He was a complete pain in the ass, but I've rarely seen a lawyer who fought so hard for his clients. He reminded me of you in that sense, actually. He does a good job because he has a real sense of when to settle vs. when to pursue and he tries to get the best deals for his clients. He's very, very good at that, and if he's able to carry that skill over to a relationship in a constructive way, he'd be good for you."

Spencer really looked at Kate.

"So tell me about your picture on the cover of the paper the other day."

Kate looked down. "Really?"

"Really."

She told him about Claudia's concert and all the aftermath.

"How did you feel when this appeared on the front page of the paper?"

"Pissed as hell. Hurt."

"Is the picture flipped?"

"What do you mean?"

"Were you sitting on Justin's left or right?"

"Left, why?"

"Because I know mom taught you to only put a flower behind your right ear if you were available. I'm guessing Justin didn't pick up on that, right?"

Kate sighed. "Yeah. He thinks he owns me and it's really getting on my nerves. This was just a case in point, when he kept presenting us as together in a way we're not."

"So you were divorcing, then seeing each other, then there were a few months where you weren't after he dumped you. What happened?"

"I never told you about the pregnancy scare, did I?"

"No. Something you want to share with Terri, too?"

"Yeah."

Spencer hugged his younger sister.

Kate helped by setting the table, then dinner was served.

After they finished eating, Terri started the interrogation. "Tell me about the pregnancy scare."

"I thought I was pregnant because of a home test, so I went to the doctor. Then Justin pressed for what was going on with me and I said I was pregnant. But I was in a hurry because of a case, so I said it and left. Then I found out that I wasn't pregnant, and when I was done with the case, I wound up in my office. And Justin was willing to stay together for the kid's sake, but when I told him I wasn't pregnant, he just said I was like a Christmas tree that, when you got to close, bombs started to drop. Then he said that half the time he thought about how much he loved me, and half the time he spent wishing he'd never met me. That's not going to change." Tears rolled down Kate's face.

Terri reached out her hand to Kate and said, "No, no it's not. You deserve better than that."

"I just pictured myself having no father, no mother, no husband, and no baby. Which is worse than not having three out of three things. So I haven't been over because your family reminds me too much of that."

Terri said, "I'm sorry. You're welcome any time, and we're family too."

Spencer said, "Kate, he filed for divorce, he's ended things with you half a dozen times I can think of, and probably more that you haven't told me about. He may care about you, but you're not who he really wants. The fact that you're interested enough in Ben just means that Justin's not really right for you, either. But you know all this. History's against you."

"I never give up, though."

"Don't look at it as giving up on the relationship with Justin. Look at it as trying to come to a resolution where both you and Justin will be, at some point, happier than you are now. You remember I was dating Dorothy when I met Terri, and I kept things going with Dorothy long past the point they should have been because I was scared to break things off."

"I remember being really frustrated with you about that."

Spencer asked, "Final grilling question: which one of them is better in the sack?"

Kate blushed furiously. "Spencer!"

"Kate, just trying to help, here. Am I wrong that you've slept with Ben?"

"No, you're not wrong."

"So answer the question."

Irritated, she remembered why she didn't open up to Spencer. He was like her in that way: relentless. "Ben is tons better in the sack. More than that, he actually seems to want to sleep with me, not one of Justin's stronger suits."

"Ouch. So what's the dynamic with Justin?"

"I've pretty much always had to initiate anything, no matter how much was going on. He was always busy or too tired and never really gave his all. Only rarely cared if I was satisfied."

"And Ben?"

"Tender and thorough. Why have one orgasm when both of you can have four?"

Spencer laughed. "That sounds like what I've seen of nuke-it-from-orbit Ben. You should set up a lunch for the four of us. I can get a sitter."

"That could be awkward."

"Shouldn't be, I still work odd jobs for Reed, Reed & Grogan, you know. Doc requests and all that."

"I didn't know."

"Yep, time for partner Grogan to meet a lowly associate who works from home. Plus, he's already met Lauren, so that'll be the rest of your immediate family."

She sent Ben a text message. "My brother Spencer would like to meet you for lunch. I'll be there, too. You available some day soon?"

A one word answer came from Ben: "Tomorrow?"

Spencer made the arrangements, Kate text messaged Ben, then Kate called a cab and returned to Lauren's.

#

Ben woke up Sunday morning with a sense of dread. Sure, the visit with Spencer could be about something related to Reed, Reed, and Grogan business, but he suspected it was something else altogether.

His back stung from the stitches he'd gotten in his back Saturday afternoon, but so long as he moved slowly when dressing, it was okay. He'd made sure to see Dr. Moorthi again. "Your new wife's quite a tiger, Mr. Grogan," and Ben couldn't help but smirk and blush. "Despite the inconvenience of the moment, it's something to be proud of, I think. Not as common as one might hope."

"Dr. Moorthi, I need some other tests done. While I'm here, can we do those?" Ben asked.

"Of course."

Ben told the doc what he wanted, and Dr. Moorthi wrote all the requests up and sent Ben off to the lab after he was stitched up.

Given that it was Sunday, he dressed down: black loafers, super tight jeans, a white dress shirt unbuttoned two buttons and the sleeves rolled up, finished with a black leather tailored jacket and designer sunglasses. He stuffed a tie in one pocket in case he needed it, then drove to pick up Kate at Lauren's.

He saw her through the windows as he walked up to the door. She wore a skin-tight short denim sleeveless dress with a skinny black belt, black patent pumps, and carried a short black leather jacket over her left shoulder. He opened his car door for her, and they drove to the restaurant.

Kate headed to a private room in the rear and Ben followed. The room was a booth with a small space between the doorway and the booth, and Terri and Spencer sat on the right. Kate entered on the left side, opposite Terri, and Ben sat opposite Spencer.

Terri asked, "Did you two coordinate outfits or is this accidental?"

"I've never seen him in jeans before," Kate said. "Never knew he owned a pair, actually."

"You two look spectacular together," Terri said. Ben smiled despite himself. So that's what this was about: whether his sister's almost beau was good enough for the family. On the other hand, he couldn't imagine Kate going along with that kind of talk at this point unless they hadn't told her why they wanted to meet him.

Ben asked, "Were you three talking about me behind my back?"

"He was grilling me about you," Kate explained.

"She has an interesting way of answering the pho-"

"Spencer!" Kate looked for something to lob at her brother, then realized they were in a nice restaurant.

Ben tilted his head and raised an eyebrow, looking at Kate. She started to blush, and he watched as she slowly turned bright red, saying nothing.

"That must have been some greeting," he said, prodding her.

She raised an eyebrow and smiled, but refused to clarify.

Ben leaned on his hand to shield his face from Spencer and Terri, then whispered to Kate, "I can guess, Katherine Reed-Grogan."

Her mouth opened in surprise, all the confirmation he needed.

"I'm sorry," he said, turning to Terri and Spencer. "Where were we?"

"I gave Kate proxy over my partnership shares in Reed and Reed, so she and I discussed you when you were buying into the firm. We've only really talked about non-work things since then, and never discussed you until yesterday."

So she'd needed someone to lean on after they parted yesterday and picked her brother. Ben's recollection of Spencer was that he was firm but genteel, didn't easily reveal his hand with a case, and was a lot like what he'd heard Teddy was like.

The conversation turned to Reed and Reed, and Kate started acting more and more nervous, so Ben reached under the table to find her hand. She relaxed as he continued to hold it.

Terri said, "Let's see you two kiss."

Ben lifted Katy's hand and led her to the small area in front of their booth. A bit nervous due to the people watching, he put his arms around Kate's waist, waiting for her to put her arms on him. When she did, he touched his lips gently to hers. After a few seconds, they both had lost their self-consciousness of kissing in front of Kate's brother and sister-in-law and were lost in each other's lips and mouths.

Then Ben cued Kate to an impending tango move, and she shifted her weight in response. He led her around the small space, then presented his knee for her sentada, supporting her leaning back with his left arm as she raised her legs and curled them over his supporting right arm, cradling in his arms.

"Ohh," Terri said, smiling.

"Now that's chemistry," Spencer agreed.

Ben lifted Kate so she could stand gracefully, then took her hand and led her back to the table. Spencer and Terri were whispering.

"Did you ever tango with Justin?" Spencer asked.

"We tried once, but he didn't like it."

Ben tilted his head and raised an eyebrow in curiosity. "What's not to like about it?"

"Too complicated, he said. I liked the variety."

Ben snorted, but said nothing. He wasn't going to say what he really thought: this was a woman capable of seducing a wet paper bag into doing her bidding. Justin didn't like initiating sex, didn't like the tango, probably couldn't give a massage worth a damn, and he liked handcuffs. He just seemed so middle America in some ways, which Kate decidedly was not. Kate never touched him, at least in public, with the familiarity she used frequently with Ben, and he believed her about how she and Justin were together in private.

Spencer smiled. "You two are really good together."

Kate looked down at her salad.

"Spencer, I'll give it to you straight. I've told Kate that, while I love her, I'm not going to play second fiddle or even first fiddle where there's more than one. Justin doesn't know how far things have gone, and if he did, that wouldn't go over well. So Kate's got some tough things to do, and it's best if I back off until they're done."

"Kate?" Spencer asked.

Kate nodded, but didn't look happy about it. Her hands were shaking.

The conversation just stopped, and after the silence had gone on awkwardly long, the server entered with the check.

Ben picked up the tab, thanked Spencer and Terri for the invitation, and led Kate to the car with his hand on her waist.

"I've developed a man crush on your shoes, Katie," he finally admitted.

"I wore this pair specifically to torment you," she said.

"It's working."

She relaxed as they walked, and almost had the perk back in her stride when they reached his car. After he made sure she was tucked in the seat, he opened the glove box and removed two tissues for her; he'd noticed she was on the brink of crying.

He walked her to the door, as always, and Lauren saw them.

"Ben!" Lauren said, "What are you doing here?"

"Kate wanted me to meet her brother - since he's the other major historical party in the firm I hadn't met since signing on."

A worried look crossed Lauren's face, so Ben was quick to clarify, "It had nothing to do with firm politics, it was simply meet the family kind of stuff."

"Oh," Lauren said, relaxing.

Ben said, "Speaking of, I have my own family thing tonight, so I'd better go."

"You two look really cute together with the coordinating looks," Lauren said.

Ben grinned. "Thanks," he said, letting himself out.

Thank goodness that was over. He couldn't handle a repeat with Lauren, but he didn't feel sorry for Kate having to face any grilling from Lauren alone. Much.

When he got home, he decided to first burn off his frustration in a way that had improved his health over the last few months: he went for too long a run.

#

Kate changed, packed clothing for the next day, and got ready for Justin's, telling Lauren where she was going on her way out the door.

Lauren looked up quizzically, but said only goodbye.

Justin answered the door, glowered at her, then let her in without saying anything.

"Oh, Justin, don't do that."

"You mean, don't be mad for making me wait for two days?"

"Making you wait for what?"

"To see you again."

Kate sighed.

"We've been through this before."

"Look, you're pushing too hard. You and I had no plans for the weekend, and I had things I'd been putting off, like seeing Spencer and Terri."

"No plans except you had said you'd start taking care of the apartment hunting, which is something you said you'd do but haven't been doing. Not to mention it's easier to do on weekends."

Truth was, she'd rather stay at Lauren's. This hunting for a place for the two of them wasn't something she was fully aboard, for obvious reasons. "Actually, all I said was that I didn't want to live with you here. You now, if this is that important to you, you should probably take the lead on this. Leo can help."

"I'm not happy about this, Kate, but I'll do it. Will you actually go with me to see places if I set things up?"

"Yes."

"So how was Spencer?" Leave it to Justin to leave Terri out. She'd barely spoken to him since he filed for divorce, and the invitations had thinned out over the months since.

"Spencer _and Terri_ were fine. They asked how you were doing."

"Did you tell them we were back together?"

Kate barely avoided another sigh. "Terri asked me, 'So why are you sleeping with him again?'"

"I'd expect that from her. I'm more curious about what Spencer said."

She'd been so blown away by the reaction to Ben, she couldn't place anything specific he'd said, just questions he'd asked that were reverberating around her head. "He was almost as enthusiastic as Terri," she said.

Justin ordered bad takeout, but she wasn't going to complain. Anything was just a really long way from having breakfast from the Fairmont room's terrace with Ben.

She was still sore from all their activities, thought about her brief hospital stay.

"I'm turning in early," she said, changing into a tank and fresh underwear. She curled up into a ball, then faced away from where Justin would sleep.

The following morning, Kate sat in Justin's breakfast nook in her turquoise kimono.

They exchanged meaningless words about Justin's case while she thought about Ben.

"This is nice, right?" He asked.

Kate was still mentally eating on the Fairmont's terrace, so she missed what Justin meant. "What?"

He gestured. "This. Us. Feels good."

She smiled, then looked at him. "Are you asking or telling?"

"Hahaha," he replied, missing that it really had been a serious question.

The phone rang, and Justin said, "Listen, I've got some get out the vote dinners this week. You want to be my date?" He leaned over to kiss her before walking across the room to answer the phone.

She waited until he was on the phone before saying, bitterly, "Sure." Because that was exactly how she wanted to spend her evenings for the next month. Not.

She was missing Ben's smile, and she played Claudia Alves while Justin was on the phone. She wasn't listening to his conversation, but heard the word "tonight." Great, it was beginning. She'd be the model ex-wife, and wouldn't that be weird.

Ignoring Justin, she dressed for work, took along a nicer outfit for later in case she was right, and walked to BART without saying good-bye to Justin.

#

Monday morning, Ben got into the elevator, where Kate was doing her best to avoid looking gloomy. Or at him. She carried a garment bag with her, which he'd only seen a couple of other times. He hoped that didn't mean what he thought it did.

"Good morning, sunshine," he said, noticing her puffy eyes.

"Good morning, Ben. How's your back?"

"Catwoman scratched it the other night. It hurts."

"I'm glad."

"Seriously, I could use your help. The bandage came partway off and I don't want to bleed all over my shirt and suit."

"Men's executive washroom in five minutes?"

"Thanks. I owe you." The image that popped to mind would probably lead to her leaving scratches on the other side, though, and not accidentally this time.

"Owe me for the scratches or for the dressing?"

He chuckled, then whispered in her ear. "For the best night of my life, Katie."

She blushed bright red.

Just then, the elevator door opened. Leo stood there with coffee, which Kate took. When she walked out of earshot, Leo chuckled and asked, "Tormenting Kate in the elevator again?"

"Whenever possible." He winked and turned for his office without explaining.

#

Kate walked into the executive men's washroom, something she'd only done once before: when Ben had called her to retrieve his shirt after Beth's chocolate doused the one he was wearing.

Ben was looking at the inside of his jacket, but Kate could see there was indeed a drop of blood on his shirt.

"Ben, you were right to worry." He reached into the closet and pulled out a spare shirt from the cubby with his name.

She guided him into the handicap stall, where she hung her purse on the hook.

She untied his tie, then began unbuttoning his shirt.

"Mmmm," he said. "I didn't know you cared."

"I don't," she teased while he pulled off his shirt.

"Here," she said, giving him a bottle of saline solution, a small bottle of water, and a cotton towel. "You do the stain removal while I take care of your back."

She looked at his back and gasped. "You got stitches?"

"I visited Dr. Moorthi again, and he stitched me up later in the day. He was quite impressed with your handiwork."

"No..." she said, blushing furiously.

The deepest gouge, out of three total, was probably going to scar. She pulled the other cotton towel out. "Ben, I'll need some of that saline here." She rinsed his wounds off then handed him back the bottle.

Kate tore open the packet of antibiotics, rubbing it into the gauges, then carefully bandaged the three scratches using gauze and tape.

She spun him around and pushed him gently to the wall, then whispered, "Okay, husband dearest, I've dressed your wounds. Looks like one of them may scar."

"Mmm, tiger wife, the gift that keeps on giving."

"I'm so sorry." He hadn't complained at the time, but that had to hurt.

"Don't be, it's just a battle scar on the way to your heart." He leaned over to whisper in her ear. "I might want a matching one on the other side someday, though."

Exasperated, she said, "Oh yeah? Don't get your hopes up." Then she leaned forward and kissed him passionately. "Now you'll need to remove the lipstick stains from your face, too."

Ben smirked and stroked her face. "FYI, I'll be out of your hair the rest of the day and part of tomorrow. Sacramento calls."

Her face turned serious. "Ben," she said. "About that 'best night' line." A great sadness filled her eyes.

"Yes?" He stroked her face more.

"I had high school finally figured out. I had a boyfriend who'd kissed me for the first time. I'd gotten As on my report card after having trouble adjusting to a new school. I felt on top of the world. And then I went home to find out that my mother had been diagnosed with terminal cancer and she died six weeks later."

"The universe doesn't always work like that, Katie. I can have the best night of my life so far and it doesn't mean that I can't have a better one. Say, tomorrow tonight, for example." He smiled.

"There you go being logical. I was talking about my fear - fear of it happening again. Fear of having flesh-dissolving acid rain on my parade."

Just then, Leo's voice interrupted them. "I put a file on your desk." Kate and Leo's secret code for an upcoming meeting that wouldn't set Lauren off.

Kate left Ben alone in the stall, and walked out behind Leo.

"Why are you doing this walk of shame, Kate?"

"He hurt his back and didn't want to ruin his suit, so I dressed his wound. No shame involved."

"Why the men's bathroom?"

"Because I'd rather be caught by you than have Ben caught by Lauren, silly." She walked to the kitchen to return the tape to the first aid cabinet.

#

At six o'clock, Kate realized that she'd never talked to Leo about apartments, and he'd already left for the day. She'd have to do it tomorrow before Ben returned.

#

That evening, Kate walked into Justin's get out the vote dinner, feeling horrifically underdressed in a simple, conservative, sleeveless black cocktail dress. She tried to imagine doing this night after night, for several months every two years, for time immemorial. It may be Justin's idea of what he wanted, but it was even farther from Kate's than Lauren's PR events she'd hold for the firm every now and again.

She sat through dinner without speaking unless she was spoken to, hardly her style. Truth was, she was seething, and Ben wasn't around to talk to, she'd spoken to Spencer yesterday, and she needed someone else to talk to.

Before the local candidate's speeches began, she said to Justin, "I'm not feeling well, I need to go." Then, to the rest of the table, "Thank you all for your lovely company."

Justin frowned, but said nothing.

She had Allison dialed before she got out of the building, her hands shaking before Allison answered.

"Can we go out for drinks tonight?"

"Sure, in ten? Where are you?"

They agreed on a bar Justin wasn't known to frequent, and Kate threw down her credit card for the tab.

"You know what you said about an amicable divorce?"

"Yeah. How's that going?"

"After the case, I finally signed the divorce papers."

"Congratulations!" Allison raised her glass and clinked with Kate's.

The look on Kate's face must have given her away, because Allison's face fell. "So that wasn't the end?"

"Allison, he was propositioning me even as I handed him the divorce paperwork, even though we hadn't slept together in months."

"Oh dear God. You know, you can be very selfish, but that man runs hot and cold like bad plumbing in Maine in winter. It's not what you need, and it's always seemed to me to be about whatever he wanted in the moment."

"It gets worse."

"You're divorced. How could that get worse?"

Kate looked down.

"Oh no you didn't."

"I kinda did, yes. I just ran out of a political dinner he wanted me to go to. He was not happy. I just can't take those."

"I half expected you'd wind up with the hot new partner."

"I kinda did, yes."

"Oh hell yeah." She raised her glass again, and they toasted. Then Allison's face fell. "Oh, wait. I get it. You're seeing both of them now? I can't imagine the ex would be okay with that, and I'm guessing HNP isn't either."

"Bingo. The ex wants to move in together, and I- I don't. HNP wants everything to be over with the ex before things go any further."

"What does HNP want from you?"

"Wife." The word came out so calmly, so matter-of-factly it frightened Kate.

"Wow. how do you feel about that?"

"Giddy like a schoolgirl." She thought for a moment. "And terrified beyond belief."

"Do you even want to get married again?"

"I was sure I never did, but then he shows up and shakes up my life. I can't not think about it, though not all the thoughts are positive." She sipped her drink. "I suppose that's normal, though."

"So what's holding you up?"

"I can't figure out how to end things with the ex. It's just so- messy. Plus, I do love him." She gestured at the air several times, then continued. "It's weird, but the ex has kinda become his own rebound guy. He just thinks it's so much more."

"The problem is that he doesn't love you the way you need to be loved. Nor vice-versa. It'll always run hot and cold and the average will be tepid at best. Speaking as a lesbian, and as a woman whose partners have sometimes gone through this: there's never a good time to come out to a hostile family. There are better and worse times, of course, but there's never a good time. By analogy, there will never be a good time for you to tell someone that you want to end things, but if you want HNP, it's got to be done."

Kate nodded. "You know, most of the time we were married, and most of the time after that, I was the initiator. It got to be a huge burden all the time. I'd ask for sex, he'd ask for more out of our relationship. I'd kind of expected more when he asked me to marry him so he could get me in the sack more easily."

"You hadn't known each other long, though. Weeks?"

"Six weeks or so, but you know me and calendars."

"You've known HNP for how long?"

"Just before our case over the transplant, so close to a year. It was the night the ex was mugged, and I was waiting for him in a bar, and he didn't show, of course. So HNP comes over, starts talking to me, and at some point, I start thinking all these sexy thoughts and I wind up propositioning him."

"You _what_?"

"Yeah, I know. I don't even go to bars alone, much less proposition guys. The bar was the ex's idea."

"You know, in high school and college you were so much the Ms. No kind of person - you could repel any seduction attempt. I seriously thought you knew that Mark was gay and you were just as closeted as he was. But then I noticed you watched men and not women."

"Nope, not gay. Just not particularly attracted to the personalities of most men. And then I walked out of the bar alone, kind of wistful about it. So guess who was in my office the next day as counsel for one of the parties in my mediation?"

Allison chuckled, "So then what?"

"Oh, we exchanged a lot of love/hate. I'm not proud of telling him that I mostly hated him. Not one of my best moments. He'd been talking with the ex and said the ex said I didn't like HNP and that was ironic. I still don't get that."

"What happened a few days before that?"

Kate's mouth hung open. "Oh. I propositioned him again after we saw the ex on a date."

"So when did you finally sleep with him?"

"A couple weeks ago."

"Took you long enough. What made you sleep with him?"

"He'd gotten this case, private jet, swanky mountain lodge, gotten Boss Lady to harangue me into going, got a federal court to appoint me Special Master. You know I'm not impressed by money, so the jet was something of a turnoff. The lodge was nice, but it was pretty clear why we were there. I don't think Boss Lady figured out why HNP wanted me there."

"Wow, that's quite an elaborate setup for a seduction attempt."

"Tell me about it. I have to admit the Special Master was really the coolest part. I was just literally going to sleep with him after he got upset with me, and, well, things happened. I asked him to kiss me and things went from there."

"So how's HNP in the sack?"

Despite herself, Kate glowed.

Allison laughed. "I think you might outshine the sun with that look. If I'd taken video of you talking to me about the ex vs. HNP and you could just really look at yourself, the decision would be easy."

The cocktail waitress brought their next round. "Oh, since you work for the hospital, if you hear rumors that I've eloped, they're not true."

"Who started that rumor?"

"Uhh, I kinda did, though HNP used the word elope. It already got back to me through my brother. Related to how I wound up in the ER the other night."

"What happened?"

"We were tangoing and I swooned. Literally. Fell on my ass."

Allison burst out laughing. "HNP, I assume."

Kate gestured with her hands to make clear that it was without having to say anything.

"Do you want my advice?"

"Sure."

"End things with the ex, then make a happy woman out of me by inviting me to your wedding as your maid of honor. When we can get married in California, Cindi and I will return the favor."

"Deal." She raised her glass and they clinked again.

Allison finished her drink. "You do realize you just agreed to marry the guy?"

Kate thought about the weekend, then smiled. "I'm drunk and therefore brave right now, Allison. Lately, I've been a big chicken." Kate finished off her drink and said, "I've gotta run, and I know you start work earlier than I do."

#

After a long day of depositions, Ben sat in his hotel room in silk boxers and cashmere-blend socks, not having to conform to anyone else's standards of beauty. He was reading on his iPad when the phone call from Alessandra came in.

She said, "Hey, I happened to be in a bar and heard something that pertains to you."

"Oh? Is it bad?"

"I think you'll be happy, overall. Is there some recent tango mishap you haven't told me about?"

Ben laughed. "Mmmhmm. Why?"

"Then this conversation is one you want to hear. Let me just send over the recording. Call me back after you've listened to it, and tell me about the tango mishap because I'm an old married woman." They both laughed.

"Will do." He was curious and saw the incoming email from Alessandra. He hung up and listened to the file. A couple bits were unclear because of the surrounding noise, but the deal was perfectly clear. He listened to the whole conversation twice and the deal segment another dozen times.

Then he returned Alessandra's call.

"Thank you. That was golden."

"Usually I'd hear about these things from you, Ben."

"They just happened Friday night, Alessandra. Saturday I was in no shape for company. I planned to come over on Sunday, but Kate wanted me to meet her brother and sister-in-law, and it felt like a job interview as husband."

"That used to be the end of things for you."

"True, but Kate's different. I actually want to marry her."

"When she's ready, bring her over for dinner. Standing invitation."

"You know I will. Sorry I wasn't up for company this weekend, but it was a very bittersweet time."

"Did you stick to your guns?"

"Oh, hell no."

"That's my Benny. Was it worth it?"

"Alessandra, it was the best night of my life, and that's even with the scary hospital part taken into account."

"That's really sweet, Ben. Well, I'm going to guess you're going to be the sentimental Ben tonight, so I'll leave you to your recording."

"Thanks. I owe you."

"Don't drink too much."

"One glass of champagne, maybe?"

"Have one for her, hon. She sounds like she needs it." Ben agreed. It was a difficult place for her to be in, and no amount of pain he felt could feel like a marriage ending with a slow and long grind the way Kate and Justin were doing.


	12. Chapter 12: Finale, pt 1

After the get out the vote dinner and getting drunk with Allison, Kate reached Justin's place 20 minutes before he did, and she used the key he'd given her to get in. She quickly brushed her teeth and used mouthwash to get as much alcohol smell out as she could, then dug at the bottom of her purse for one of the rolls of breath mints she'd bought last week, and put one mint in each cheek.

She dressed in a tank and underwear, as she'd been doing lately, pulled a book out of her purse, and curled up with her book until Justin arrived.

He came in, kissed her on her cheek, and said, "I want to talk about what happened tonight."

"I wasn't feeling well."

"You're not pregnant, are you?" His forehead wrinkled.

"God, I hope not. I was out drinking. I just have been meaning to get back into Tae Kwan Do, and I overdid it Saturday. I hurt all over," she lied.

Justin left for a moment, then came back with a glass and two ibuprofen. There were times when he could do just the right thing, even if it happened to be for the wrong reason.

"Thanks, Justin."

"Do you need a massage?"

"No. Hurt too much." Truthfully, she just wasn't that crazy about having him touch her all over tonight. She probably should have stayed at Lauren's, but that would have made Justin madder. "I think I'll take a shower if you don't mind." Anything to get out of the mandatory talk.

She wasn't that lucky, though, because as soon as she'd gotten into the shower, he stood outside and started talking to her. She tried not to show how annoyed she really was at his intrusion into her safe space.

"Do you really want to be here?" he asked.

"Come on, Justin, you know I don't do things I don't want to do. It's not my style." She had carefully skirted around the question without lying.

"Well, you weren't really enthused about the dinner, were you?"

"No, but it's not something I fully realized until I went. It's weird. I'm your ex."

"But we're together again, so you're not my ex."

"Are we? Together again? You keep saying that."

"You know I want to make plans."

She stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around her. "Justin, I- I don't, really." She flashed back to her conversation with Allison, where she'd so easily made a promise of a very different plan. Maybe she just didn't want to make plans with _Justin_. That was an easy enough theory to test.

"You just don't like plans," he said.

She didn't know what to say. He'd always accused her of that, but never really explained what he meant. Worse, she didn't truly understand what he meant by it: going on vacation together? Because that had never worked out. Always one or the other of them had had to cancel. Living together? That hadn't worked out either, nor had marriage. "So you keep telling me," she said, hoping she didn't sound as bitter as she felt.

Justin scoffed and walked away.

She woke up the next morning crying again. She'd tried to tell Justin she wasn't happy, tried to get to the real point she needed to say, but he just deliberately mis-heard what she'd said.

#

By the time Kate reached Leo's desk, he was reading the paper. "I know you're there."

"How much do you love me," Kate asked Leo, knowing he'd hate doing this for her.

"What do you need?" He put the paper he'd been reading down.

She grabbed the paper off his desk, looking at the article Leo had open about Justin being behind DA Davidson in the polls.

"Don't read that."

"Justin and I have decided to move in together." She walked to her office. "Can you join one of those apartment finder services? You know what I like."

"You liked the boat. Plus Justin's apartment is really, really nice."

"Well, we're both giving up our places." She saw Ben approaching. That cleanup didn't take long. Damn. She thought she had longer.

"So Justin is giving up his gorgeous BART-adjacent two-bedroom with high ceilings and you're giving up Lauren's couch." Ben walked up, briefcase in hand, and Kate's heart fluttered.

"Uhh- well, we'll see, you know. Nothing is for sure, really." Truth is, Justin had been pressuring her to start apartment hunting since she and Ben had gotten back from Tahoe, and she'd been stalling. She'd been hoping Ben wouldn't find out, and secretly hoping the whole thing would just blow up. She sat down in her chair.

Ben asked, "You and Justin are getting a place together?"

Great. Just great. "Uhh huh," Kate said mousily. "Yeah, it just kind of makes sense rent-wise."

Leo said with scorn, "Kate's all about the money."

Ben entered her office and said, "I know a guy with a few apartment buildings. It's a pretty tough market right now." No, no, she seriously did not need this right now.

She looked down at her paperwork and grabbed a pen. "Uhh, that's all right, we don't really need your guy." She looked up.

"Why are you renting? You and Justin should just buy a place together." She squirmed in her chair.

Leo changed the subject. "Your 9:00 is here."

Kate lost it. "You know what? I need a minute. Okay. Please?" She shooed Leo and Ben out of her office and slammed the door behind them. She was just so pissed off at everyone, it was better than blowing up.

"What did I say?" Ben asked Leo.

Kate re-opened the door and popped her head out. "Nothing. You didn't say anything. I just slammed my door a little bit too hard." Damnit.

"Okay," Ben said softly.

"Yeah," said Kate.

"She wants a guy," Ben said to Leo.

"She doesn't want a guy."

"She will."

She knew they were deliberately tormenting her. Neither liked the rekindling, if you could call it that, of her relationship with Justin. Hell, she wasn't sure she liked it, though there were times when it worked. It was like a dotted line where the dots grew further apart.

Ben's trust in her on Friday night, the way he'd hovered in the hospital, the way he'd been willing to not make a big deal about this with other people, and the night they'd spent together. She'd clawed him senseless, but what she really remembered was how that moment felt for her at that time - that love was infinite. Never, not once, had she felt that with Justin.

She'd dug herself deep in more than one sense. All she wanted to know now was how to get to the right place out of the pit and to a place where she could be happy, if such a thing were possible.

#

Ben sat in his office for the few minutes before Kate's negotiation pretending not to notice how Kate was fawning at him from hers. Yesterday, she'd taken off his shirt, fixed his back, and kissed him - and then today gone and asked Leo to help her find a place to move into with Justin. Now she was swooning at him.

He took the cell phone pics from the other day of their hotel room and sent them off to his guy - Alessandra's husband, Geo.

"Ben, got a few minutes?" Lauren asked. She rarely came to his office for a personal summoning, so he followed her to her office with great curiosity. On her desk was the same article Kate had been reading about Justin being behind in the polls.

"I heard you suggest Kate and Justin buy a place together."

"And?"

"Please don't. I had _just_ gotten Justin to tell Kate she should see other people and go out on a date when things went south again."

"I saw that conversation. It was horrifically awkward. That was the night she got drunk and I drove her home. Then she propositioned me." He saw the startled look on Lauren's face and quickly added, ". . . and I turned her down."

"Well, then, this may be easier than I thought. He's going to be District Attorney if I have anything to say about it, and Kate is not a District Attorney's wife. Voters don't like DAs living together outside of marriage, no matter how many of the voters do the same, and Davidson's bound to use that at some point. Also, I saw their entire relationship, and don't want to see it again."

Ben tapped his pen against his finger for a moment before answering. "How can I help?"

"Now that Justin's back aboard the Kate train, I have no idea how to pry them apart."

"Oh, I can tell you that. It has to be her idea."

"Could you put in any kind of word here?"

"I can assure you that anything I do in that department will backfire. If I did _anything_, and I do mean anything, she would set herself and Justin up as part of the crew for the first manned mission to Mars and suddenly be off-planet, careers be damned. Hell, she'd probably mediate from space. My best strategy is being friendly and waiting for it to fall apart, because you know it will."

"It will, and it'll be a huge distraction to his career if the timing is bad." She changed subjects. "Is the Tahoe client happy with the outcome?"

"Ecstatic. He is my oldest client, Lauren. There is no worry there. His family mentored me into becoming a lawyer, and his wife's my best friend. They are firmly behind the Kate train, as you put it, and there is zero chance we'd lose them to another firm."

"Back to Kate, do you have any ideas?"

"I do. Have Justin present Kate with an ultimatum that you know Kate won't agree to."

"Then she'll think it's her idea."

"Exactly."

"Brilliant idea, hope it works." She smiled. "Good luck, partner."

"Thanks."

"And don't forget to send me a wedding invitation."

That sucker-punched Ben, for all he could think about was Kate thwapping him with a pillow and asking him what he'd really wanted to call her, and that incredibly scary feeling in the pit of his stomach that had never gone away since that moment. He couldn't say anything, and the pain on his face betrayed how he felt.

"Oh hell, Ben, I'm sorry. Plymouth and tonic?"

"Please," he barely managed to croak.

She walked to the small bar, pulled out the icepick, and chopped off some ice. She got the correct glass out of the glassware cabinet, cut open a lime and squeezed most of it in, then trimmed the glass with one slice from the lime.

Ben's throat had unclenched enough for him to speak. "Wow, there's some skill."

"I bartended my way through law school. That's how I met Teddy, actually."

"Huh. Why did you say that to me? About the invitation?"

"You two in the driveway. Plus, I hear things."

"Like?"

"Rumor was that you two eloped."

Ben rolled his eyes. "We were having a conversation about the craziness of long engagements," he lied.

"Ever worked with an SO before?"

"Alessandra, one of our clients, has been my paralegal before, but we were exes long before that. So, no."

"Why didn't you hire her as your paralegal here?"

"Because we didn't have the budget. Also, Kate."

"You have exes all over the place. I heard about the opposing counsel with Kate's mediation."

"And the Redmayne case."

"No wonder she was being such a hardass right before trial."

"It wasn't the first time. Look, I cast a wide net. I'm not proud of that, but I'm not ashamed of it either. It just sometimes makes work a little too interesting. Fortunately, Redmayne got his four mil instead of the quarter mil settlement I didn't tell him about, and he's happy with us again. And Lydia didn't try to have me disbarred because, well, she's the one who told Redmayne about the offer." Ben still chuckled at Lydia's expression when he'd said _The Bar Association will be so crushed_.

"Sometime I'm going to have to get you drunk and get all those stories out of you."

He smiled and stood up, leaning over her desk. "I bet you have some great stories of your own," he teased. "I need to get back to research." He turned for the door.

Lauren said, "Ben?" He turned back. "I think you'd be good for Kate in a way Justin couldn't be for her. And I think she's been good for you. That is, when both of you aren't driving me crazy. Or each other."

"Thanks," he said. "I do know of an apartment I think Kate would love and I have a plan, so if you hear me talking about her getting a place, please understand. My hope is that she'll buy it by herself."

"Let's hope so. She makes enough to buy her own place."

#

Kate, still distracted by her thoughts of Ben, went into her mediation where a young lesbian couple had been fired for workplace fraternization. She thought about everything that had happened between her and Ben at work, from the first kiss onwards.

"Miss Reed," she heard herself being summoned by the women's attorney.

"I am so sorry," Kate said.

After they started talking about the case, Rachel said, "We know other people who had relationships at work where management looked the other way."

"How many?" Kate asked.

"Several." The attorney supported Rachel, and Kate's heart went out to Rachel's obvious hurt. She didn't care for Nora's snippiness.

Rachel said, "Great, maybe we can break all of them up, too."

Kate asked, "Oh, so you two aren't a couple any more?"

After more exchanges, the attorney said, "They were engaged."

Nora said, sarcastically, "We had talked about it."

Rachel said, "Getting engaged was on our To Do list. It's what grown-up professionals do when they spend too much time at work. Technically, we weren't engaged. Technically, we weren't allowed to show any affection at work. It rocked. Still have no idea how management found out about this."

The two women began arguing, and Kate said firmly, "One mediation at a time." Then she pointed out that, given the lack of a current relationship, they could go back.

"I can't go back," Rachel said.

"I could go back," Nora said.

The employer's attorney offered Nora her job back if she'd sign a release. "Send it. I'll sign it. See you Monday." Nora got up and left. Well, that was one mediation off the table.

The women's attorney left, saying, "This is unacceptable."

Kate sat down next to Rachel. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," Rachel replied.

"So what do you want?"

Rachel broke down, crying. "I don't know. I want my work." Rachel clearly had an emotional bond to her work like Kate did, and it was all she had from a couple of years there.

Kate negotiated with the employer to give her a standard severance package and her work product back.

While that was being arranged, Kate went to see Lauren.

"How's your billionaire boyfriend?"

"Uhhhh, that's over. I was foolish to think things could have worked out between us."

"Oh, that's very Downton Abbey," Kate said awkwardly.

"Is this why you needed to see me?"

Kate said that she'd be moving out, that she and Justin would be getting a place.

"I'm happy for you," Lauren said, a little too formally. "I'll actually miss having you around." That part sounded genuine.

After a couple more interchanges, Rachel knocked on the doorway. "Miss Reed? There's a problem. They didn't give me everything back."

The employer, Kate, and Rachel argued. Rachel's story was a year's worth of work over a multi-million dollar land deal with the city.

After the employer left in a huff, Kate asked Rachel, "Is it possible they fired you to bury the story?"

#

Rachel sat in a chair in Ben's office. Her attorney had walked out, so she needed a new one. As usual, Kate couldn't do it because it was a conflict with the mediation. So here Ben sat with one of Kate's lost causes, trying not to say anything to further hurt the wounded bird before Kate told him what exactly he was in for.

"It's a coverup. Just listen," Kate said when she swooshed into the room.

"Can't wait," Ben replied.

"I was looking into this bogus land deal the city made," Rachel explained, elaborating about the deal between the city and Selex.

Kate said, "Ben. I know they did this. I know they tried to bury the story."

Ben was lost in thought as he fussed with his pen.

"Okay," he said. "But if you're right," he said, looking at Kate, "then this could be dangerous for both of you. Being fired is only one possible step they could take."

"I'm in," Kate said hastily.

"Me too," Rachel said.

Ben shrugged. He wouldn't expect differently from either of them, but he couldn't think back to the games they had on the case with Travis where Katie had gone to talk to a drug dealer all alone.

After their meeting, Ben saw Kate leaving with her purse, knowing she was off to look at a place with Justin. He headed for the roof to be alone for a while.

#

Kate didn't like the look of the super-modern building from the outside. No wonder it wasn't shown in the pictures. It reminded her of a wasp's nest in Bauhaus form.

Justin and Kate were discussing the mediation, and Justin mentioned a prior issue with Selex and Kaplan, its CEO.

"Ohhhh, I like this place, it's cool," Justin said, surveying the industrial-style apartment with polished concrete floors.

"It's kinda cold," she said. "I just don't want to live somewhere where it's so easy I clean up a dead body."

Justin turned to her and said, "This is your idea."

She turned and glared at him. It most definitely was not her idea.

"And my idea."

They talked about Rachel's case for a couple of minutes, Justin questioning why Kate was taking the case on. Ben didn't try to second-guess her anymore about cases. In fact, he'd agreed to take this one on without her having to plead. But, even after years, Justin was still arguing with her about causes that were important to her.

"Look, this really isn't that bad," Justin said about the apartment. Warmth was not his strongest suit. When she first met Ben, she expected he'd be less warm than Justin. To her surprise, she was wrong. Behind that cold, cynical exterior was a man with real heart.

"Oh, Justin, I don't know. I was hoping that we could find something that has like these cute French doors and it would open up to this amazing patio - and not concrete and steel."

"Oh, so you lock in on one detail. That's a great strategy."

"This is the only the first place we've seen. You know what? Next!" She strode out of the place while Justin lingered behind.

#

Ben saw her return, glad to see the sour look on Kate's face before she saw him. When she saw him, she forced a slight smile.

Leo and Kate were outside the exec offices discussing Selex and Paul Kaplan when Ben walked up.

"How do we get a corporate tax return," Kate asked.

Ben answered, "We don't. That's the beauty of not selling stock to the meddling general public."

"So then some millionaire just gets to hide out in the Caymans killing news stories?"

"How's the apartment hunt going?" Really? Because that announcement was just this morning.

"It's good," she lied. She stammered for a minute, then said, "There are lots of options."

"Good," he said. "Well, if you want one more-"

"I don't."

"You guys both think this is awkward for me, it's not. I'm offering to help because I have connections." He started walking away.

"It's awkward," she whispered to Leo.

"It's not," Ben retorted.

Leo leaned in. "It's awkward. I don't care what he says."

Ben emerged from his office with his iPad. "I know how we can get a copy of Selex's corpoate tax returns."

Kate closed the distance between them. "How?"

"The tax retuns are private. Its shareholders, not so much." He turned the iPad so she could see the names. Sure enough, one leaped out. She raised her eyebrows flirtatiously in admiration. Ben could be magic at times.

Ben and Kate headed into Lauren's office.

Ben said, "Paul Kaplan tries to keep tight control of his company, but a few years ago, he ran into trouble and had to sell off twenty percent ownership to raise capital. He sold three percent to someone who sat in this very chair." He grabbed onto one of Lauren's guest chairs.

"A client?" Lauren asked.

"Uh, no," Kate said. "Robin Archer."

"Lauren, I couldn't help but notice that you and he had a three-hour lunch not so long ago."

"I negotiated one deal with the man."

"That was the day that Justin's life was falling apart, right?"

Kate turned to look at Ben.

"I'm just trying to gauge how important it must have been for you to be away that long."

Kate interrupted before he could say anything else. "Hey, you know what? Knock it off."

"They have a relationship. I'm not defining it or judging it, but we could use it right now," he said over Kate's continued objections.

Kate interrupted him, "Fine, you know what? This was a bad idea."

To Kate's surprise, Lauren agreed to ask Robin about the tax returns.

#

Kate stormed into Ben's office after him, closing the door behind her. "Not defining it or judging it?" She said, testily. "Why does Lauren get that treatment and I don't?"

He slowly closed the distance between them sporting the slightest of smiles, his smile broadening with each step. As he approached, her breathing grew irregular, and she started to blush. He pushed her gently back to the wall, watching for the objection that never came, then pressed her hips to the wall with his own.

"You know why."

Brushing his lips against hers, he answered her question. "Maybe I want more definition," then kissed her gently. "Maybe I don't like the way Justin's hurt you and the way you go back for more." His placed his index fingers on her shoulders at the edge of her blue dress's neckline, slowly tracing the edge of the deep V neckline until his fingers touched, then reversed the motion back to her shoulders. "Maybe I want you all to myself so I can kiss you for the rest of our lives."

As he claimed her mouth with his own, Kate couldn't help but think of Rachel's comment earlier. _Getting engaged was on our To Do list. It's what grown-up professionals do when they spend too much time at work._ She moaned softly, then wrapped her arms around him and returned the kiss with enthusiasm.

When Ben pulled away to look at her, Kate asked, "Survey question: you said you wanted me to be your wife. What time frame did you have in mind?"

Ben smiled and checked his watch. "Probably too late for the county clerk, but there are still flights to Vegas."

"Today?" She asked, stunned.

He swallowed hard. "Oh yeah. I'll book the flights." The thought of waking up next to her tomorrow, all his, was almost more than he could bear.

"Hmm," she said, tracing his lips with her finger for what seemed like an eternity. "Sorry, Benny, not today. You might want to work on your proposal a bit." She blew him a kiss, whirled, and left, leaving the door open.

A couple of minutes later, Ben was still standing there, mouth hanging open, when Leo brought in some copies for him.

"Kate do that to you?"

Ben just nodded.

"You're not going to tell me, are you?"

Ben shook his head.

"I never thought anything or anyone could render you speechless."

Ben shrugged, smiling.

#

Leo walked to Kate's office and closed the door.

Before she even looked up, he said, "You broke Ben."

"Whahaa?"

"You have turned Mr. Talks a Thousand Miles an Hour over Anyone Else, Especially Leo into a mute." Leo paused. "Though he did look really happy about it, whatever it was."

She turned bright red and smiled, looking off into space. Truth was, she'd very nearly said yes, and wouldn't that leave a mess with Justin. _Sorry, I can't go apartment hunting with you, I eloped with Ben. No, really this time. I have no idea what his place looks like, but I'm sure it has taste._

Leo said, "Yeah, just like that."

Leo sat at Kate's desk and put his elbows on the desk, then supported his chin with his hands. Kate continued looking off in space.

"Share, girlfriend."

"Nuh-uh." Kate said, simply.

"Kids these days," Leo said, closing Kate's door behind him.


	13. Chapter 13: Finale, pt 2

**a/n: This series has made me a huge fan of elevator scenes...**

**Finale, Part 2**

When Kate was out of the office for a while, Ben approached Leo.

"Name your price," Ben said.

"For?"

"A guy. Referred to Justin. By you."

"You think I'm getting into the middle of that?"

"I'm wondering what it would take to get you to step into that fray."

"Nope."

Ben sat on the edge of Leo's desk and leaned over, speaking conspiratorially. "Let's be practical here. There are things you want in life that I can provide. There are things I want in life that you can provide. There is a symmetry to this, and the universe becomes a better place."

"Fine." Leo leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. "You know Kate. You know she'll find out. So I'm only going to do this if I can tell Justin that it's your guy."

"Fine. Trust me, Leo. It's what she really wants." And what Justin doesn't. His inner Evil Ben cackled with glee.

Leo swirled his tea. "Fine." He started telling a story. Ben lifted his hand to stop Leo's long story, and got out his pen, committing to sponsor both Leo and Ashley for the next charity bike ride for more money than Leo made in a month.

#

Lauren tried to compose herself as she strode to Robin's table. Truth was, it'd have been far easier to end things with him if Kate hadn't needed her to see him and Ben hadn't jumped all over her. Neither of which explained the thrill and fear that went through her as she approached him, nor the reaction she had as his gentle blue eyes studied her face as he stood when he saw her. He was a billionaire, he didn't need to stand for anyone, but he stood up when she entered a room.

Lauren dove right in, which calmed her feelings for Robin. "I need your help." She described the investment in Selex and Paul Kaplan.

"I know Paul. We've been up against each other in some big deals. I don't like his methods."

Lauren explained that they needed Selex's tax returns.

Robin laughed in response. "Not something he is likely to share."

"You do own three percent."

"Know your enemies. I would take fifty-one percent if he'd let me."

Lauren fumbled for words. "Help us with this tax return and you might just get your wish."

Robin stirred his coffee, but said nothing.

"Look, I know this is a huge favor to ask, given what happened."

"You dumping me?" Robin said, looking at her intently.

Lauren felt all giddy and girlish. "Oh please. You can hardly say that I dumped you after one date."

"I've been with people for years and never felt that way." He looked away, down, and grinned. "You know, I actually pretended not to see you when you walked in. I wanted to seem aloof." He shrugged. "But it seems I just can't hide my cards with you."

Lauren said nothing, but cleared her throat and stood before she found herself agreeing to spend the rest of the day with him again.

He said, "If only you could settle for someone who wasn't perfect."

"You make me sound adolescent for trusting my instincts."

"And your instincts are what? That I would end up hurting you?"

Lauren looked away, and Robin sighed in exasperation. He fell silent, nodded, and said, "I'll let you know what my people get out of Kaplan."

She turned to leave, then turned back to him, for one last look. "Have them come at it sideways. Make it part of a larger request to throw them off."

Robin smiled. "Thanks for the tip."

"Thank you for doing this." She turned to leave again, and he gently grabbed her hand. "I'm sorry you can't stay," he said tenderly. She looked at him, then turned for the third time and finally left.

By the time she got to her car, she was shaking. She didn't believe he was a bad person, just someone who doled out necessary information too slowly. As a lawyer, she was used to that, but she didn't like it in interpersonal relationships. Then again, the same trait had nearly broken her and Teddy up early on, and that relationship had worked out.

She feared Robin might have someone watching her, so she waited until her dark green Jaguar was parked in her spot in the Reed, Reed, and Grogan building before breaking down.

A minute later, she heard a tap on her window, and looked up to see Ben. Oh, God. She wasn't ready to leave the confines of her car, so she opened the passenger door and Ben got in, then reached out for Lauren's hand.

"What has my partner in tears, and who do I get to beat up?" His hands were soft and surprisingly warm.

Despite herself, she laughed. "I don't think you should beat up Robin Archer, especially since you have such a man crush on him."

"Ouch," he said. "I'm sorry I threw you to the lion, then."

"Ben, it needed to be done. It's okay." She withdrew her hand. "Aside from withholding information about his estranged son after a direct question, he didn't hurt me. Kate caught that, by the way."

"She would."

"I'm just not used to being bowled over," she said.

"I know the feeling, believe me. Ever since the moment I met her."

"In the mediation with Mahoney?"

"No, we met at a bar the night before. She was waiting for Justin. I didn't even have the presence of mind to ask for her name or number."

"That sounds so unlike you!"

"Tell me about it. I was about to search every divorcing woman in San Francisco and cross-reference them against female bar association members to find her, but there she was, the next morning. Enough about me. What's up with you and Robin?"

"I'm as overwhelmed by him as you were by Kate, with the additional overtones of having lived for a few years with a firm with slowly evolving money problems and Robin being a billionaire. I think I've read every gossip rag article about the man there is. Kate keeps putting them on my desk. Doesn't change how I feel."

"She does care, you know."

"She didn't used to. It's weird. She has grown a lot since she and Justin split up last year, though."

Ben simply nodded.

"Look, Ben. One self-made rich man crushing on another - Kate doesn't like Robin. Would you promise me one thing?"

"What's that?"

"That you won't automatically take her side about Robin?"

"I promise. I also promise not to assume he's a good guy because he's a self-made billionaire."

"I'm ready to get back to work. Thanks, Ben." She squeezed his hand.

"Any time. Seriously. The three of us need to stick together."

#

Kate was tired of looking at apartments over her lunch hour. Justin had dragged her to three just today, the last in an older yellow and white building. "Oh, man, how many of these-" Then the door fully opened and she saw the inside.

"Ohh," Justin said disparagingly. laughing. "Oh, wow, I hope it comes furnished, he said, batting a floor lamp. It's very . . . Clockwork Orange."

"Justin," Kate said, taking in the architectural details, including the moulding, the vintage fireplace surround, the open kitchen plan, the way the living room was separated by a half wall, "I kinda love it." Justin stared at her in shock.

"Oh, Kate, this is a very old building."

"I guess, but. . . . I don't know. And I guess it is kinda pricey, huh." It was the most expensive place they'd looked at. Kate could almost swing it on her own, but not if Justin didn't want to live here.

Justin talked about his fear of losing the election and having to work in the private sector instead - which would be great from a finance perspective, but not what Justin really wanted.

She took his lapels in her hands and said, "You. Do not give up." She patted his tie cheerfully.

Kate spied the French doors. "Justin," she said, pointing. "Do you know what this is?"

"Yes."

She smiled wide, then opened the sheers. "It's a terrace!" She sighed with great enthusiasm.

"It's kinda small," Justin said, trying to curb her enthusiasm.

"No no no no, it's cute-"

"You know, I think we should keep looking, honestly." He began to walk away from her.

"-It's quaint." Kate's face contorted with frustration. This is what she wanted, and Justin was just being a jerk.

"How'd you find this place, anyway?"

"I don't know. Leo called me. He said that Grogan has got some guy, so. . . ." Justin shrugged.

Kate opened her mouth in surprise, quickly closed the sheers and stepped back like the place was haunted.

Ben had managed to refer them to exactly what she wanted, and it scared the hell out of her. Did he know how much she'd like it? Did he know how much Justin would hate it? And did he pick it because of their night at the Fairmont?

She turned and tried to act cool. "You know," Kate said, "You're right. It is kind of . . . small." Not too small for one person, though.

"Really?" Justin seemed puzzled by her sudden shift.

"Yeah. Let's . . . let's keep looking."

"Okay."

She dragged him out of the place, then turned to look back after Justin had walked down the outside corridor. She needed to come back and see it again, but without Justin.

Kate didn't say a word as Justin drove her back to her office, but she did text Leo saying she wanted to see the place again - alone next time.

#

Two FBI officers showed up at Lauren's office. Before arriving, they'd warned her not to tell her partners that they were there, which made Lauren uncomfortable. Sure, there were things she needed to keep from Ben and Kate from time to time, but this should not be one of them.

"We need you to tell us about your dealings with Robin Archer."

Lauren offered a redacted version of the deal she'd made, but the male officer said, "We're not interested in the agreement."

"Oh."

So they were interested in Robin, and they were not saying why they were.

They quizzed her about her more recent contact with Robin, and she admitted she'd gone to see him about another matter, but didn't say what.

The female officer said, "Are you dating him?"

Lauren threw up her hands. "I had lunch with him. Once. He came on to me, and then I put my foot down."

"Does he want more?"

"Yes. Why?"

"We want you to get close to him."

A thrill shot through Lauren. She had a way to get closer to Robin, but she'd also have plausible deniability if things went south. The undercover work would protect her emotionally, but give her a chance to see if getting close to Robin was what she truly wanted.

"Okay."

#

"Good morning," Ben said, holding the elevator door for Kate.

"Well, hello there," she smiled.

He looked down to check her out, as he usually did, then caught her shoes. Black patent pumps.

He grinned, then looked at her.

She caught the look on his face.

"Oh, tiger," he whispered, then trilled quietly.

"Shut it," she said, pushing him against the wall. He never had told her how hot he thought that was. He pulled her hips toward him, her eyes going wide when she brushed up against his newly-bulging crotch. Not what he'd intended, for he hadn't pulled her quite that close, but welcome nevertheless.

"Now _that's_ a good morning," he whispered.

"You'd better enjoy these while I still have them," she said coolly, hips swaying very sexily against his.

He smiled at her movements. "Why?"

"They're almost worn out and I'm shopping for a place, so I can't afford to buy more shoes right now." Her taste in shoes was exquisitely expensive, he'd noticed.

"Well, that would be a tragedy."

The elevator door dinged and they pulled apart, trying to look normal when the door opened enough for Leo to see them, coffee in hand for the both of them.

Ben didn't miss the fact that she'd seen Alessandra's place the day before and she said "I'm" instead of "We're," but that could just be Kate trying to seem more available. Again.


	14. Chapter 14: Finale, pt 3

**a/n: Sorry this took so long, I was in Micronesia. :) The big meaty part of the Finale is out of the way here, but I actually have a whole bunch of other stuff that takes place before the "Hey, Neighbor" moment that's not in the episode proper, including Kate meeting Ben's parents. All coming up in future chapters...**

Ben, Kate, and Rachel went to the restaurant in the building next door. Kate and Rachel both ordered coffee, but Ben was hungry, so he ordered apple pie. This place had some of the best apple pie in the city, but Kate claimed she was watching her diet. He started shoveling down the pie, and Kate watched him, one elbow on the table, head resting on her hand, in an endearing way he was trying to ignore.

Rachel sat upright, formally, obviously nervous.

"Did you tell anyone at work about your investigation? Keep a supervisor aware of how it was going?"

"Not officially. I mean, I'd tell Nora things nutil she moved out."

Kate looked at Rachel and straightened up.

Ben asked, "Did you email?"

Rachel said, "Sure. But I mean we were always really careful to keep our conversations in personal accounts."

Ben asked, "Did you ever use your work computer to access your personal email?"

Rachel replied, "Sometimes."

"It's not personal if you're doing it at work."

Kate asked, "What?"

Even with a mouthful of pie, Ben managed to rattle off case citations about how Rachel's employer could have read her email or captured her keystrokes.

"We could never figure out how they knew we were a couple," Rachel said. "I mean, that's the only way they could have known."

Kate said, "Yeah, they start digging around about Selex and end up finding that out."

Ben asked, "Who do you know in your IT department?"

"That would be Tony," Rachel said with a nod and a slight smile.

Kate asked, "Can you trust him?"

"Yeah. Actually, I think he had a little crush on me."

Kate smiled and said, "Ahh, that's helpful!"

Ben, feeling like the guy who felt like he'd been being used for months, said grimly, "How did that work out?"

Kate stared at him, and he did a double-take looking at her.

As the three of them walked to the Reed, Reed, and Grogan building, Kate grabbed Ben's wrist and motioned to whisper in his ear. She shielded his ear from Rachel's view with her hand, then whispered, "You do not have a little crush on me, bucko."

He whispered, "You're right, but it's what I said that worries me."

She licked his ear slowly, and whispered, "Don't give up."

His breath caught, and he whispered, "Okay. May I make a suggestion?"

Kate said, "You can try."

"Flirt with Tony. Overdo it a little."

"Okay."

Kate left him to re-join Rachel, but whenever Kate looked back at him, he had a dazed smile.

The three of them returned to the Reed, Reed, and Grogan offices and brought Leo into the conference room with them to call Tony. Ben stood in the back, hands gripping a railing.

Leo dialed and said, "Hey hey Tony Tony. Thanks for talkin' to us."

Tony asked, "Are you a lawyer?"

Leo answered, "No, but the lawyers thought my gentle and tech-savvy voice might put you at ease. How's it hangin?"

Rachel said, "I'm here too, Tony."

"Hi Rach. We gotta make this quick. They wouldn't want me talking to you."

Kate said, "Uh, Tony. Hi. My name is Kate Reed. And, uh, we are calling you because we believe that R.T.N. has hacked into some of the employees' personal email accounts."

Rachel said, "No one else at the office really knows how to do that sort of thing."

Tony said, "You really should talk to someone else. I should go."

Kate replied, "Okay, hold on a second. You know, Rachel and Nora got fired because somebody in management found out that they were a couple, and, look, she just wants to understand how that happened.

Tony sighed. "Yeah. It's just I'll get in trouble if I talk about anything."

Kate pressed a button on the phone and turned to Rachel. "Okay, what do I have to do to get this guy to talk. Should I like flirt with him or talk dirty? I mean, what is it?"

Leo responded, "I mean a) you could just try respecting him like a human being, and b) that is not mute."

Ben laughed. Kate's trick probably would have worked on him at some point in the past.

Leo continued, "You pressed five."

After an awkward pause, Kate said, "Sorry. Tony."

Tony replied, "It's cool."

Kate said, "Okay, look," she sighed, "I'm just going to be completely honest with you. This is not just about someone's personal information being read. We think that management might be trying to kill one of Rachel's stories, and if there is anything that you know about that, you would be like R2-D2."

Leo rolled his eyes. "That's pandering, and dated."

Ben crossed to join the other three. "You'd be like Bishop in Aliens."

Leo said, "That's not any better."

Tony asked, "Are you guys talking about Selex?"

Everyone leaned closer to the phone. Kate said, "Uhh, yes. What do you know about it?"

Tony said to Rachel, "Before you left, they made me search for any documents containing the word. They told me to look in any email accounts accessed from work."

Kate lit up and pointed at Ben several times. "I knew it! Who's Erin Brockonuts now, sucka!"

Ben leaned over into the phone, "Who told you to do it, Tony?"

"Jerry from Legal."

Leo asked, "Uhh, Tony, can you trace that email from Jerry back to its root?"

"I'll take a look. Give me a few minutes and I'll call you back. Hey Rachel, pick up."

Kate guided Rachel to the nearest phone, but no one took Tony off speaker.

"Is that girl Kate single? She sounds hot."

Ben smirked at Kate. Bingo.

#

Kate and Rachel walked to Kate's office frome the conference room.

"I'm sorry, Kate, I didn't know he was going to ask that, but I'd gathered you and your partner were seeing each other."

"You know, it's, uh, it's kinda complicated."

"So, you're single."

"Well, uh, I am, uh, divorced."

"Oh. So you've been to the real dark place."

"Splitting up was . . . hard. You know, we definitely, um, had some dark moments.

"Nora and I, we were crazy in love. It's hard to imagine now, but she broke my heart. You still see him? Your ex?"

"Sometimes."

Leo rapped on Kate's window. "That's Tony, line one."

Kate answered. "Tony, Tony. You are on speakerphone." Ben walked up to Kate's office.

Tony said, "Thank you."

"Mmmhmm."

"There's a root. Someone tried to erase the trail for sure, but I can trace the request to search Rachel's accounts all the way up through senior management. Here's where it came in the front door: a one-line email to Jerry. 'Please do what we discussed.'"

Ben asked, "Who's it from, Tony?"

Kate asked, "Was it Paul Kaplan?"

"No. Aaron Davidson." Everyone paused to think. "Hello?"

Kate said, "D. A. Davidson?"

#

Ben drove Kate over to City Hall, and they walked from Ben's car up through the plaza. "I dug pretty deep. There's no money trail between Davidson and Paul Kaplan. And there's no ties to Selex either."

"But there has to be a connection. Davidson killed the story."

"Yeah, but Davidson's too smart to get tagged. That email's only incriminating if you know what he was referring to. I'll keep digging."

She smiled at him, knowing he would. "Yeah." She look and saw Davidson up ahead at a food truck.

"Or, you could just go ask him."

Kate flew up the stairs, and Ben sighed.

"Oh, Mister D.A." Kate said sarcastically.

"Oh, Kate Reed, the Good Wife."

"Oh, suck it Aaron. You know what? You have scared people so much about crime in this city that they might actually be too scared to come out and vote."

"Oh, I think they'll be too scared not to, if you look at the alternative."

"Hey, you know what? Who's going to handle cases whenever you're just so busy paying back favors from all the people who helped get you elected?"

"The voters elect me, kiddo."

"Uh huh. Well, the voters didn't get a crazy awesome deal on 200 acres of condemned property from the city. How many people did you help get evicted to sell that land?"

He looked at her, hissed, then walked away.

"Oh, Aaron, how much are Kaplan and Selex paying you, huh?"

He turned to reply. "If you think I broke any rules, why don't you get your established blue-chip firm of Bitch & Bitch to come after me, huh? You can call your ex-husband to the stand as an expert witness. He's gonna need a job."

Ben strode up and said protectively, "She doesn't work for Bitch & Bitch any more, it's Bitch, Bitch, & Jackass, now."

Kate said in her sultriest voice. "I've taken you once, Aaron. I'll take you again."

After Davidson stormed off, Kate took Ben's arm. "Come on, my dear jackass. I want to nail that jerk."

"My pleasure, darling bitch."

#

Kate and Ben joined Robin Archer and Lauren in the conference room while Archer explained that he couldn't get Selex's tax returns and now Paul Kaplan was out for Reed & Reed.

Robin listed all the reasons he wouldn't help the firm, then said, "So what does that leave?" He turned to Lauren, who started to beam. "That leaves you, Lauren."

"Wow," Kate said sarcastically.

"Right?" Ben said, almost as sarcastically.

Robin continued, "Kaplan's flying into town for the night. He's going to be staying at my place downtown.

Kate asked, "Oh. He's staying with you."

"Oh, it's a big place."

Lauren said, "It's a hotel."

"So I've set up a face-to-face meeting so we can put all this behind us." Robin smiled at Lauren.

Kate left the conference room with a frown on her face. Something wasn't sitting right. She walked to her office, noticing the chemistry between Robin and Lauren. Something wasn't quite right there, either. Lauren was unusually tense.

Kate sat in her chair and watched the couple, wondering what to do. Then Ben walked down the corridor and she hurried to intercept him, thinking of a plan.

"Hey," she said as Ben approached.

"Hey."

"Ohh." Kate smiled at him and shook her head.

Ben approached very closely, looking at her curiously. "Right, thanks for checking in, Kate." and he turned to leave.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him back, then patted his chest. "No no no no. No no no no. Wait. Wait. Wait." She admired the plainer grey suit than he usually wore, light pink shirt, and the dark purple tie with small light pink squares. The look suited him.

"Are you smelling burnt almonds or tasting pennies? 'Cause I'm not quite sure what's goin' on here."

She rested both hands on his chest to keep him from moving and giggled. He giggled in response.

"Oh, uh, Rachel called me," she said. "She met the source, a guy named Glen Graham who works at the city contracts office, I guess when the whole thing went down? Anyway, I'm gonna follow up."

Robin said to Kate, "I'll, um, I'll be in touch."

Kate replied, "Oh, okay. Bye."

Then she turned to Ben and said, "Bye."

He stared after her, puzzled, saying "Bye" in response, still not understanding what just happened.

#

Ben watched Kate leave her office, deliberately leaving her phone on her desk. Something was up, asking for Ben to stay in the hallway until Robin Archer over heard her telling him something. What was that all about?

Ben noticed Leo wasn't around, so he walked into Kate's office and sat in her chair looking to see if there were any clues on her desk. The phone number that last called her wasn't. Most of the paperwork was upcoming mediations.

Leo walked by Kate's office, saw Ben, then walked back. "What the heck are you doing in there?" He asked.

"Trying to imagine what it's like to be Kate Reed."

Leo replied, "Please tell me you're wearing pants."

Ben lifted a file raised from the desk, and saw the heart-shaped rock he'd found in Tahoe. After she'd frozen, he'd left it. He'd hoped that it would offer something to talk about so they could discuss their mutual feelings, and that worked. He hadn't seen a need to keep the rock, especially after his larger ploy hadn't worked at first. But she had taken the rock, and even though she'd been with Justin at times over the past few weeks, even though they were apartment hunting together, she'd kept the rock only a few feet from where Ben sat every single day. He'd seen her holding something in her fist, and she'd occasionally look over, but he'd never realized it had something to do with him.

He'd been such an idiot, thinking she was dumping him by benign neglect. He thought back to their pretend marriage, how she'd told him she loved him, and how she'd insisted he spend the night with her. Maybe she wasn't as attached to Justin as he feared.

Leo interrupted Ben's thoughts. "Can I ask you a question? Why are you letting this happen?"

Ben looked up. "What happen?" He released the file folder, re-covering the rock. How much did Leo know about what had happened recently between them?

"I love Justin. He's a great guy. But Kate's just getting swept back into this whole thing. She's just floating along with," he gestured, "everything."

"Kate doesn't float along with anything."

"She does now. She needs a paddle. You're the paddle, dude. Why aren't you doing something?"

"It's not a sprint, Leo, it's a marathon."

Leo leaned forward. "It's not a metaphor, Ben, it's a life." Leo grabbed the candy jar and left the room.

Ben looked in the last part of Kate's desk and found a record by Blind Melon with Glen Graham in the lineup. Suddenly, what she'd done clicked. "Holy crap," he said.

Leo backed into the doorway. "What?"

Ben demanded, "Where is she?"

Leo told him and Ben ran to his car heading off to Archer's hotel, her phone in his pocket. If he was right, she could be in danger. If he wasn't right, he needed to make sure she was safe.

On the drive to the Royal Archer, he called Alessandra. Hell, he didn't even know if Kate and Justin had been seeing places beyond the one he'd recommended, but Justin had hated the place. Ben knew she'd love it, so maybe he could help persuade her choice another way.

He got voice mail, and said, "Alessandra, would you and your husband lower the asking price on your place by 10% only for Kate and call Kate in a few hours? If Kate accepts, I'll pay the difference."

Smirking, he pulled up to the Royal Archer only a few seconds after Kate did, relieved that she was okay. He walked up behind her briskly, and asked, "Are you looking for Glen Graham?"

She smiled, then said, "Okay, seriously? You have got to stop popping up everywhere like this."

He suppressed a smirk. "Glen Graham isn't a new source. He's the drummer for Blind Melon. I saw the album on your desk. You made the whole thing up for Archer to hear. To test him."

She smiled. "You got me."

"And I'm guessing it's the same name Tony called you back with because somehow the network got that name. And were told to look for more files."

"Ahh," she said, tickling him under his chin and leaning into him as he leaned into her, noses almost touching, "you are smarter than you look." Her touch sent a thrill through him, but he could finally relax knowing that she was safe, at least for now.

"Low expectations are the key to happiness." He paused for a millisecond as they walked to the escalator. "Why would Archer tell anyone that name, is he working with Kaplan? Why's he gunning for Reed & Reed?"

"Well, I'll let you know." Kate ran down the escalator, leaving Ben alone. Again. He stared after her. When she hit the bottom of the escalator, she blew him a kiss. This was a serious change in body language. She'd always fondled him a lot, occasionally pushed him against walls, but she'd never used such obviously affectionate and romantic gestures as a blown kiss or fondling his chin in public before.

Ben saw much of the Kate/Robin conversation and her accusations through the window once he'd gotten back down to the first floor. She was impressive getting under Archer's skin, but she seemed to leap off the deep end with her conclusions.

Then she said something that made his heart almost stop, "I never give up." All Ben could think of was Justin.

Yet there was a freeness about her mood he hadn't seen from her since she started seeing Justin again. Something had materially changed today. It couldn't have involved a phone call from Alessandra because Kate's phone was in Ben's pocket.

She turned, and saw Ben, and he smiled at her, and her smile lit up places in his heart.

"Hey," he said, "You ditched me."

She smiled and said flirtatiously, "Get used to it."

His head tilted and he smiled at her, completely unsure how to take her flirting. Was she finally going to dump Justin?

She kissed the window, then pressed her finger at the glass, gesturing at him, letting him know she'd intended the kiss specifically for him. She ran off, turned around to look at him again, laughed, then got a cab before Ben could even move.

He really hoped that meant what he thought it did.

#

About half an hour later, Kate was walking by the firm's kitchen when she heard Ben say, "I love you too, pumpkin."

Kate flew into the kitchen at lightning speed, only to see him holding a brown-haired girl around five years old, looking down at her with complete adoration. Her small pudgy hand stroked his cheek and she looked at him with rapt attention.

Ben caught the look on Kate's face and smirked. "Kate, this is my client's daughter, Enrica. Enrica, this is Kate."

Enrica took one look at Kate and held out her arms, but Kate was having none of it and crossed her arms.

"Isn't she a little young for you?" Kate sassed.

Ben said, softly, "She wants you to hold her." Kate had to admit, the little girl's adoration of Ben was really cute.

"Oh no no," Kate said.

"You could make a little girl's whole day."

Kate opened her arms and Enrica beamed. Kate smiled back at her. "Hi!"

Ben, with a twinkle, kissed Enrica on the lips, then handed her off to Kate. Enrica promptly kissed Kate, which made Kate coo at her. Then Kate gave an openmouthed glare at Ben, who was having entirely too much fun smirking over his successful kiss-by-proxy.

Just then, a stunning brunette in a navy pantsuit came in, claimed Enrica from Kate, and turned to Ben. "I'll be in your office, Ben." To Kate, she said, "Well done on getting her out of Ben's arms. Even I can't manage that most of the time." Before the woman could be introduced, she was gone.

Ben closed the distance between himself and Kate, not quite pressed up against her but close enough so she could feel his heat and his breath. "You were jealous," he teased.

Her face turned hot with embarrassment.

"And you liked my stealth kiss."

Kate whispered, "Is that your daughter?"

"No. Her father looks a bit like me, that's all. Let's get back to the business at hand. You were jealous, weren't you?"

Kate looked down. "Nuh uh." She looked up, smiling. "Who's the mom?"

"Client. Why?"

"Just a client?"

"She is now, if I'm understanding what you're really asking."

"Some history there?"

"Some, but very old history. Obviously not bad history, though. You've got nothing to be afraid of, tiger. I'm not interested in her that way, and she's happily married."

"She's very pretty."

"That she is, but have you looked in the mirror lately? You are stunning, especially when you smile."

He placed his hands on her shoulders and pushed her gently to the wall, then leaned in for a kiss. Soft, yet insistent, powerful, yet gentle, his lips claimed hers, and she responded with enthusiasm and a soft moan.

Ben broke the kiss off suddenly, and said, "If you're so jealous of me saying that I love someone else, quiz me about whether or not a random woman's my ex, and you respond to my kisses like that, why the hell are you moving in with another man?" His tone was deliberately light, but she could tell there was a lot of hurt, not to mention jealousy, behind the words. After he left the room, a tear rolled down her face. She brushed it away with the back of her hand.

She hated to admit that Ben had a point.

#

Ben returned to his office to find Alessandra and Enrica waiting for him. His smile had found its way back on his face.

"So what happened in there?"

"Oh, I was cooing over Enrica as I do, and Kate overheard me say I loved Enrica. So Kate storms in like it's the end of the world."

"I'd have paid to see that," Alessandra said.

"After you left, I made her admit she was jealous and kissed her, then got all pissy about her reacting to me like that but house hunting with her ex."

"Ouch."

"Well, let's just hope she buys your place by herself."

"I know you're not the praying kind, Ben, but we'll take up the call on your behalf. It's time you were happy."

"Speaking of happy, let's go over all this real estate paperwork for the sale to Fortnam and make sure there's enough money for you." And the firm. When Enrica started to fidget, Ben held her on his lap and rocked her from time to time. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed that Kate was staring, but didn't turn to look.

#

Kate watched from her office, Ben handling the girl with the familiarity of immediate family, comfortably integrating Enrica into his work. Damn, he looked like a father.

She remembered last falling asleep on her father's lap as a teenager one night when he was working late not long after her mother died. As a kid, she'd occasionally done the same thing before Teddy started his own firm.

She stopped by Leo's desk. "When Ben's done with this client, would you tell him to see me? I'll be," and she pointed her thumb up. "He'll know what I mean."

Stepping out onto the roof, Kate leaned against the outside of the stairwell for support and broke into sobs. The sight of Ben with Enrica re-opened old wounds.

A couple of minutes later, the roof door opened. Ben didn't see her right away until he turned around.

"Oh, honey, what's wrong?" He removed his tie and put it in his pocket, then leaned over to kiss her forehead. "You're not crying over what I said, are you?"

She shook her head.

"Oh, thank goodness. It was kind of harsh." He wrapped his arms around her and gently stroked her back.

Kind of? "It's because you really looked like a father with Enrica."

He studied her face, but couldn't make the leap. "I'm sorry, can you translate that into guy speak for me?"

"I've- I've always wanted kids."

"You and Justin were together a long time. Why didn't you have any?"

Kate looked down. "He always told me I'd be a bad mother, that I wouldn't be good for the children because I was so selfish, that. . . ." Her voice trailed off, and she started sobbing again.

"Oh Katie," Ben said, brushing away the tears with his right hand. "Why did you ever listen to that crap?"

"He made such a good case. Over and over and over. Eventually, I agreed with him. And then there was the pregnancy scare a couple of months before you and I met. Justin wanted to stay with me while we thought I was pregnant, but wouldn't give me the time of day once we knew I wasn't."

Ben stroked her hair. "And here I thought I was a jackass. You wouldn't make a stereotypical good mother, true, but you have some of the best qualities for a mom that I've ever seen. You fight for other people. No one's better than you at the win-win. I believe you'd help any kid you ever had get exactly where they needed to go in life, even if that was on the first manned Mars mission."

She smiled at that last image. "Really?" Her entire face lit up.

"Really, Katie. It's one of the reasons I fell for you."

She looked up at him. "Would you translate that into girl speak?"

"Katie, I want kids more than anything else, just like you do, and you're the first person I've met in years who I thought would be good at it. You're also good at keeping me in line when I need it. Last thing kids need is a jackass - I should know. Though, frankly, your Mean Girls Prep routine can be just as bad."

Kate said, "Plus, you really made me miss my dad back at his old law firm when I'd go visit him sometimes after school. Before he founded Reed & Reed."

"That's the first time I've heard you call him dad."

"Before I started working at Reed & Reed, I never used the word father unless I was mad at him. After, well, the formality seemed necessary and I got used to it."

"So, getting back to kids, what's your plan?"

"C'mon, this is me we're talking about. You think I have a plan other than have some hot guy ravish me until I pop one out?

Ben chuckled, then moved one hand to stroke her abdomen possessively. "I like that plan, but 'tis a wee bit incomplete."

"My friend Allison said the other day that I was never good at making plans with Justin because subconsciously I knew I was with the wrong guy."

"Is _that_ what the sudden marriage date pop quiz was all about?"

She chuckled. "Yeah. You're more of a planner than I am, but still spontaneous, so I just wanted to see what that combo was like for you."

"Hmm, the Fairmont wasn't enough for you? Well, much as I'd like to wake up next to my wife tomorrow morning, I'd actually rather plan something fun and different that was shared with our friends and family with somewhere between two weeks and a month of planning torment. Something that goes horribly wrong in ways that we can laugh about for years, maybe with some crazy Wozniak parrot man stunt. Beats getting married by some random Elvis impersonator without our friends and family to laugh with us."

She laughed. "Oh, I don't know, we could charter a bus and bring them with us."

"Because you can see Lauren on that bus for ten hours, especially as we drive through Bakersfield. That's so Lauren."

Kate laughed. "After my dad died, she went to play pool and drink shots to save a client who didn't want a woman lawyer. I have never seen anyone so plotzed in my life as when she came back to the office. Oh. My. God."

"So . . . plotzed Lauren on a bus. In Bakersfield. That we can't get off of for ten hours." Kate giggled at the image.

Ben said, "Or it could be local, say Nicastro, and you'd be on time this time - guaranteed - because it'd take you two hours to get into that rubber dress."

"I'm not getting married in a rubber dress, bucko."

Ben opened his mouth to speak, but a voice interrupted them. "As much as your wedding plans intrigue me, Lauren's asking for a status update."

Kate blushed all the way to her toes. "Leo! How long have you been standing there?"

"A busload of Elvises in Bakersfield with a plotzed Lauren. And you in a rubber dress. Ben wearing something," he waved his hands, "complementary. Parrot man swooping in to save the day. And me with a kid-sized party hat at a jaunty angle."

Kate rolled her eyes. "So not helping."

#

Kate was in knots as Justin blindfolded her with his crappy tie and led her into an apartment he wanted her to see, and she was tied up even further in knots when she saw it was his existing place. She couldn't live here, this place was his all over, and she'd never fit in. Sure, there were things she liked about it, like the wooden ceiling and the location, but she never felt like she belonged there, especially with all the masculine furniture and the brick. It was dark, and she hadn't been happy here, and Justin had never figured that out.

Justin began to hand her a housewarming present when she finally gathered her wits together enough to balk.

"Oh, Justin."

"Here we go."

"Oh, God, what?" She said, insulted. They couldn't even have real arguments any more, because he thought he had her all figured out.

"Nothing. I just know you, that's all." Bullshit. He only thought he did.

"Look, this is the, uh. . . , right needle, wrong haystack. I've been fighting this feeling-"

Justin interrupted, and she knew he was going to keep interrupting the way he always did. "Oh, my, Kate-"

". . .and I keep hoping-" She continued, trying to pretend he wasn't steamrolling her again.

"Don't do this!"

". . .that this is going to feel right-"

"It does feel right. We're not who we used to be, don't do this." Justin only filed for divorce about a year ago, though. They hadn't changed that much since then.

Anticipating the next argument phase, Kate headed it off at the pass. "I know you think that I'm running away." He always said that kind of thing, though, and often it had happened to be true. What if her fear was simply that part of her rejecting the relationship? What if part of her had known that it wasn't the right relationship all along and she'd never figured that out?

"Yeah, because you are. I knew you were gonna get scared."

She said emphatically, "I'm not scared."

Justin nodded his head, meaning she was lying to him, which just pissed her off.

Kate said, trying to let him down as easily as possible, "Justin, I know we're good for each other, but I don't think we're meant to be together." Because she was meant to be with Ben. That much had become clear, especially after the last few days.

"How can you know that?" Justin pried.

"Because." She didn't want to clarify.

"You take a risk and you jump in." She'd taken a risk recently and jumped in, only it wasn't with Justin. And that felt better.

"We did. And we keep doing that."

Justin sighed.

"And I know you think I'm running away, but I'm not. If anything, for the first time in my life, I'm," she gestured, "running toward something."

"Yeah. Or toward someone." So that's it. He continued to be jealous of the sparks he saw between her and Ben, and he was pushing Kate because he wanted to prevent Ben from stepping in - completely unaware it had already happened.

"No. Maybe." Ohh, that sounds bad, she realized belatedly, then added, "Me." Some people knew how to be alone in ways Kate simply wasn't wired for. She needed that connection, and her connection with Ben had shown her how flawed that connection with Justin was.

Justin said, dramatically, "If you walk out that door, Kate, that is it. Okay? It is over."

Kate began backing away from him toward the door, and Justin scoffed.

She said, "I'm sorry. I am. And I really do love you," and headed for the door.

The very last thing she heard Justin say was a whisper, "Goodbye."

She got to the door and said, "You know what I've learned? I do like making plans. I've just never liked making them with you."

When she was a block away, she called Allison. "I just walked out on Justin. I need drinks. Got some free time?"

They agreed to meet in 15 minutes.

She wrote and erased half a dozen texts to Ben, but sent none of them. Maybe she'd drunk text him later.

Allison walked into the bar after Kate was already seated, and came to give Kate a hug before sitting down herself.

"Are you going to need more hugs or should I sit across from you?"

"Across is easier for talking, but thanks for asking."

Their first round of drinks arrived.

"So what happened with the ex? How's the Hot New Partner?"

"I woke up with more courage today. I'm not sure why. HNP was trying to be protective in a way that was irritating and cute and so utterly adorable that I blew him kisses in public." She held her glass with both hands. "Sometimes I plan to flirt, and I'm very aware of that, and sometimes there's the spontaneous gesture. Well, you know the ex and spontaneous gestures."

"They don't exist in the same universe," Allison said.

"Exactly. So there I was at the bottom of an escalator I'd just run down to get away from HNP and I turn and blow him a kiss. That's just not something I'd have done with the ex."

She reached into her pocket and realized that Ben had stuffed it with tissues the other day. She pulled one out.

"HNP put several of these in my pocket when we left the hotel the other day."

"There was a hotel and you didn't tell me?"

"Yeah, it was so awesome. Oh, wait. So it had this amazing terrace and then the ex and I went to look at an apartment that HNP recommended to Leo. It also had an small terrace, similar colored walls. It was gorgeous."

"Did HNP know how much you liked the hotel?"

"Oh yeah, so that was why it was so completely awkward that I was looking at it with the ex. If I'd looked at it alone, then that would be different."

"Could you swing it on your own?"

"Yeah. I always made more than the ex, not that that's one of my main focuses."

"If you can buy it on your own, you should. Really."

Kate got excited. "I hadn't even thought of that, Allison. I'm free to buy my own place. God, that would be so awesome. I've never lived alone. Lauren and I have been getting along, but we're so different, and it's been really awkward at times. Like, uh, the night the ex was over."

Just then, Kate's phone rang, and the number was that of her real estate agent. "Let me get this outside where it's quieter." She stepped outside, nervous inside. "They want what?" She listened to the revised offer on the place she'd loved so much. "Yes, yes, I'll take it." She actually jumped up and down. "No, I'll be buying it alone. Don't call Justin. I'll come do new paperwork in the morning." After hanging up, she yelled, "Yes!" so enthusiastically a couple walking by looked at her funny.

She ran back into the bar and sat across from Allison. "I got the place, they dropped the price."

"Maybe you should thank HNP."

"I tried to compose half a dozen text messages and deleted every one without sending them."

"Give me that," Allison said. Kate handed over her phone, and Allison entered a text to Ben but didn't send it yet. "Okay if I send this for you?"

The text said, "Dumped Justin. Got my own place. Drinks now?" She added the bar's address.

Kate received a text message reply in less than a minute. "A block away, be there in five," came the reply.

Kate looked at it, said, "I think I need another drink for this," and signaled the cocktail waiter for another round. "Bring us another round plus a Plymouth and Tonic," she said.

A second text arrived: a picture of Kate at the Fairmont, in profile as she sat in the hotel robe on the Fairmont's terrace.

She showed the messages to Allison, who looked carefully at the picture. "Wow, that's actually a really nice picture of you. Very sexy. You also look super happy."

"Sexy? I look like a wreck." Kate focused on the hair strewn about as though a hurricane had been through their room.

"You look like you just got out of bed. That can be very sexy. Is in this case. You look thoroughly satisfied." She pointed out details, like Kate's relaxation, that showed what Allison meant. "Girlfriend, I'm jealous."

Kate waved her hand. "Okay, well, it's not like I judge pictures of women just out of bed as frequently as you do."

"I wasn't wrong about thoroughly satisfied, was I?"

"You mean that feeling like you can conquer the universe because you feel that awesome?"

"Wow, yeah, that."

"That's how I felt, Allison."

"It's obvious that the man who took and kept this photo loves you very much and wanted this to remember you by."

"Oh, speaking of," Kate flipped to another pic on her phone. "This was before we slept together. I kinda got carried away one night when I was trying to cheer him up. When he got home, he took the picture and sent it to me."

Allison looked at it and laughed. "He's a love-struck goofball."

"Who, me?" Ben said as he slid into the booth next to Kate and slid the Plymouth and tonic into his hands. "Hi, I've seen you in the office before, but we've never been introduced. Ben Grogan."

Kate introduced Allison, then said, "To Ben for suggesting Justin and I buy rather than rent, and later suggesting I was moving in with the wrong man, and to Allison, who encouraged me to buy on my own."

The three of them toasted. Ben found the ignored dish of bar kibble, pulled out a peanut, smirked at Kate, and placed it between his lips.

She looked at him, grinned, but didn't take him up on the implied offer. Ben swallowed the peanut. He asked, "So which place did you buy?"

Kate smiled. "I'm not telling you."

"I have ways of coaxing it out of you," he teased.

Kate turned bright red, and looked pleadingly at Allison.

Meanwhile, Ben pulled out another peanut and placed it between his lips, tilting his head toward Kate.

Allison looked between the two of them and said, "I think I should be going," and left.

Ben swallowed the unloved peanut and said to Kate, "I should get you home."

The thought sent a thrill through Kate, along with a jumble of possible scenarios.

"I can take a cab," she said defensively.

"You're a homeowner, Katie. Is that the best use of your money?"

She hated to admit he had a point. "Fine."


	15. Chapter 15: Shoes

**a/n - This is still in the Finale time frame, which I've stretched out a couple of weeks, but none of it's from the episode, so it gets a new title.**

Justin tried to take some joy in Davidson's announcement that he wasn't going to run again, but all he could think about was Kate's decision to walk out, especially her parting shot about not wanting to plan with him. Unfortunately, that had the ring of truth.

He'd been prepping for a case that afternoon in a building near Reed & Reed, and he'd looked out the window only to see Kate and Ben talking on the roof. Justin watched their body language as they talked, standing closer than he'd ever seen them, but not quite touching. Clearly, they were much closer than he'd thought.

Then Leo came up onto the roof, and they all laughed and followed Leo downstairs.

Justin mulled over Kate's words - that she was running toward something, and Justin was pretty sure she'd lied about not running toward Ben. He'd only rarely been able to tell when she was lying to him, which had always bothered him.

Ben's taunt haunted Justin. "Always so sure of everything you're so sure of?"

He considered returning the housewarming gift to the artist, but maybe it was more appropriate than ever now that she'd spread her wings from him. Maybe he'd be happier, too, if he had the courage to spread his wings away from Kate.

Eventually, maybe. But not today.

#

The Aston Martin arrived at Lauren's, and Ben walked Kate to the door. He opened his mouth to say that he should go, and Kate said, "Please come in." He shut his mouth and followed her inside. She took his hand and led him down the split level to her bedroom.

Unlike the other times, this time he was afraid because everything suddenly seemed so real. She opened the door to her room - a white-walled generic room with a happy violet floral bedspread that seemed unlikely to belong to Lauren.

"Kate-"

"Just hold me tonight," she said.

He wrapped his arms around her, and she whispered, "It's been such a long, strange day."

It had been so strange for him, but he didn't have breaking up with an ex in the middle of it, either. When did she have time for everything?

They undressed, and she led him into the shower where he spent ages massaging her back, then towel dried her and carried her to bed, tucking her in on the left side before sliding in on the right.

She turned to face him. "Thank you." After an awkward pause, she said, "I don't dare kiss you tonight as I don't think I could stop."

He smiled. "That's exactly what I was about to say." He nuzzled her nose with his own, as close to a kiss as he was willing to dare. She needed at least a bit of time and space, and she wasn't willing to have space tonight.

She buried her face in his chest hair and promptly fell asleep. "G'night tigermama," he whispered, kissing her forehead before falling asleep himself.

#

Ben slunk in the tall golden grasses, striped forelegs padding softly, avoiding the danger he sensed nearby.

Katie leaped at him, her four cubs following. They attacked him, rendering deep scratches on his back and belly, and, finally, his face. He yowled with pain, feeling like he deserved his fate for disappointing them. Then, when his face was too bloodied, Ben woke in a cold sweat.

The smell of fear lingered after he woke, the object of his fear still curled up helplessly against his chest like the innocent kitten she was, carefully-trimmed nails pressing gently into his pecs.

He wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes, but one fell onto Kate's face, waking her.

Kate's eyes opened and she looked up at him. "You okay?"

"Nightmare."

She hugged him tighter. "Care to share?"

"I'd disappointed you - oh, and we were all tigers: you, me, and our four cubs - and the five of you clawed me to death."

"That doesn't sound very nice of us."

"I really am terrified of disappointing you, Katie."

"Ben, we will disappoint each other from time to time. That's just how relationships work."

"I know, but I've disappointed people in important ways before."

"You think I haven't? Sure, you have your own opinion about Justin, but you've only heard a bit of my side of the story."

"I don't need to hear his side, Katie."

"And I don't need to hear your exes' sides, either."

"Look, I never met your parents, nor will I ever be able to. I do get a sense of who your dad was from who Lauren is, though. That's like looking through an imperfect lens. But you never questioned my line about Natalie being sent away, 'Little kids don't remember jack.' My dad ran from my mom. He got into trouble, went to jail for several months, and came back. It was never the same. He tried hard, but he was broken after that. Still is, but hides it well, and he and my mom get along well now. Mom tells me I never had nightmares until after he left, though. I don't really remember that time."

"You haven't run from your clients, Ben. You've got a long, solid track record with them."

"I have always cared about the money, Katie. It was the way to keep out of the same situation my dad was in."

"You can choose to care about love the same way."

He snuggled her. "I'm an imperfect person, Kate, but I'll try to learn that from you."

"I'll try to learn to be brave from you." She leaned up to kiss him. He hesitated for a moment before leaning in, allowing her to wrap her arms around him and take his lips in a deep kiss.

Surprisingly, it wasn't the erotic kisses he'd come to expect from her, but like someone had just poured honey all over his aching heart - lips moving slowly over his, hands reassuring him that she loved him. It's no wonder she wanted to save the world; she could manage that with her lips alone.

When their kiss ended, Ben said, "Katie, I'm not very brave. I just don't care what most people think of me, nor do I care if my clients are right or wrong. It's not the same thing, not at all. Not caring makes it easy to get ahead, but it doesn't exactly build relationships."

#

The next morning, Ben woke early and Kate was still asleep. He dressed in yesterday's clothes and headed up to Lauren's kitchen.

"Good morning, Ben," he heard from around the corner, only to see Lauren in her track suit clearly back from a run.

"Any food off limits? I was going to cook breakfast."

"Have at it, but Kate is a picky eater."

Ben leaned forward to whisper. "She walked out on Justin last night."

Lauren smiled and whispered back, "You were right about it needing to be her idea. Good job."

He shrugged. "I had nothing to do with it."

"Don't be modest. It's not your style." She slapped him on the back.

"Oww." he winced.

"You okay?"

He blushed. "I have stitches there."

"From?" She looked worried.

He pointed with this thumb at the stairway. "Wild thing mishap."

Lauren gave a throaty laugh.

With Lauren's help, he found everything he needed, plus made a shopping list of things to replace from Lauren's staples, and had the quiche crust in the oven by the time the oven pre-heated.

"Do you do this every morning, Ben?" Lauren sounded impressed.

"No, usually I pre-cook several day's worth of crusts on the weekend after going to the farmer's markets, and some days I have something else entirely. I'd just promised Katie quiche when we were in Tahoe."

Lauren left Ben in the kitchen, and the smell of coffee summoned Kate, who emerged in her turquoise patterned kimono and matching short nightgown. She came and kissed Ben on the cheek, then pouted, "You left my bed."

"If I hadn't, not sure I would have been able to keep our deal."

"You made coffee. I forgive you. Plus you're cooking something. Will there be some for me?"

"Mmmhmm." He closed in, standing oh so close to her. "Kiss me," he whispered.

"You left my bed," she repeated, then leaned in for a short kiss.

He looked at his watch and smirked. "So your love of coffee doesn't override your true feelings for me in your bed, huh?"

"Don't push it, Benny."

"Because If that's how you truly feel, Katie, if you give me five minutes for the quiche to be ready, there's still time for breakfast in bed. Or bed in bed."

"You've got five minutes." She leaned up and kissed him, her hands sliding up his shoulders, then up to his head where she pulled him into her. He wrapped his arms around her.

"See you at the office!" Lauren said cheerily and walked out the front door.

Ben chuckled, muffled by the kiss.

Kate pulled away. "What's so funny?"

"Well, we won't have to be quiet now, will we?"

"You are terrible."

"But I'm so good at it," he smirked.

#

Leo waited at the elevator with Kate's coffee, looked at Kate, then Ben, then Kate.

"I don't want to know, do I?"

"You don't."

"How are the Elvis fans this morning?" Leo handed Kate and Ben their coffees.

Kate said, "Don't start with me, Leo."

Ben said, "You should tell him the good news, make his morning."

"Dumped Justin. Bought a place." She struck a dramatic pose and whispered. "Slept with Ben."

Ben rolled his eyes and blushed.

Leo said, "Girlfriend, you had a busy night. I'm guessing you're worn out." He smiled at Ben, then said to Kate, "Therefore, I'm going to get you another cup of coffee and a multivitamin."

"Love you both," she said, heading into her office.

"What about my vitamin needs, Leo?" Ben taunted.

Leo gestured thumbs up at Ben, who smiled all the way to his office.

Leo brought the promised coffee and vitamins, closed Kate's door, then sat at Kate's desk.

"So, changing of the guard, huh?" He held up his own cup of coffee and sipped.

"Leo, I hate having held out on you, but it's been changing for a while."

"So he is the guy you kissed."

"Yep. And slept with in Tahoe. And the stitches on his back were my fault. After Tahoe, though."

Leo held up his hand. "Whoa. I think that's enough details, Kate. Why the marriage talk up there?" He gestured to the roof.

"He wants to marry me. Wants us both to change our last names to Reed-Grogan."

"Wow. So why _did_ you go back to Justin?"

"When he left me and served me with divorce papers, I thought I was the broken one. Ben showed me I wasn't, but I didn't know if the relationship with Justin was completely broken. I had to know if it was me, Justin, or the combination before trying another relationship. I think Justin was always the wrong person for me, and that was hard to face, because I do love him. He was just right enough for a few years."

"When are you getting married?"

She threw up her hands. "Geez, Leo, let a girl go on a date first."

"No boom this time, okay?"

"No boom."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

#

Ben waited until Kate went into a mediation for a divorce case, then sat on the corner of Leo's desk.

"I need a piece of intel," he said. "Name your price."

Leo smiled, then steepled his fingers. "What about Kate do you need to know now?"

"Her shoe size and designer preferences. I don't recognize all the brands she wears."

Leo grinned. "You're going to buy shoes. For Kate Reed. The shoe queen."

"Do I need to beg? Because I can."

"There are some things grown men shold not see from other grown men. Begging is one of them." Leo studied Ben's face. "Especially from you."

Ben tilted his head, but said nothing.

Leo caved. "I keep a text file for her. I'm missing the newest Scary Girl figurine. It's expensive."

"I'm sure it's worth it," Ben said.

Leo handed Ben a printout for Kate as well as one for the information on ordering the figurine.

Ben went to his office, closed the door, and started looking at shoes. He called up the local Neiman Marcus and had a twenty-minute conversation that was very profitable for the shoe salesman. Then he ordered Leo's figurine.

#

Lauren strolled into the office late, as she had been ever since Robin Archer first swept her away. Her billing rate shot through the roof, as Robin insisted that she double her rate, then threw a lot of business at the firm. She had enough business to fill her books for five years, and Robin had grudgingly allowed her to pick an associate to do her bidding.

"Well, look who's here," Leo said. "I'll call Stephanie," he said, referring to Lauren's dedicated associate.

Lauren just gave him a look, then continued to her office with her overly-full briefcase.

#

Kate came out of her mediation to see Leo smiling.

"What's up, Leo?"

"It's Christmas, Kate. Christmas in September."

"What do you mean?"

"Go look in your office." He leaned back.

Her desk was covered with seven large gift-wrapped boxes arranged into a tower with a big red bow around them all.

"What the hell?"

There was a card that said, cryptically. "You know who. You know why. Foot rubs optional." So, whatever it was was from Ben.

She opened the top box only to discover a pair of Louboutin black patent pumps. She gasped in surprise. Then opened the next box: another pair of Louboutin pumps. A Jimmy Choo pair. A Prada pair. A Gucci pair. And two pairs of Weitzmans. All in black patent and all in her size.

Kate knew how much they cost, she'd had to replace the shoes blown up with the boat. She'd probably lost between twenty and forty grand's worth of shoes, and this was easily three grand's worth.

"Leo!" She called. He entered her office and sat down.

"What am I supposed to do with all of these," she whispered. "Do you have any idea how much these cost?"

"Enough to make me glad my girlfriend wears combat boots," he said. "Those I can afford."

"Leo, I can't accept these." Kate paused, then looked at Leo. "Girlfriend? I'm guessing Ashley, right?"

"Yep. Somehow she thought helping her earn a living was hot. Back to Ben's gift..." He gestured toward Ben's office. "Talk to him about it." Leo got up and returned to his desk.

"Good job, Leo! She's really cute." Kate walked over to Ben's office.

"Ben?" she asked.

He looked up at her, unable to hide his impish grin any longer. He summoned her with the crook of his finger, and she stood on his left side.

"You spent too much money, Ben. I can't accept a present like that from you."

"Come here, I have something to show you," he said, encouraging her to lean across his lap to see something on the far side of his desk.

"I'll bet you do," she said warily.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, woman, this is work related." He turned his computer a bit.

She leaned across him, elbows on his desk, to see the email he had up on the screen. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed he was looking at her ass, so she took his chin in her hand and turned his head toward hers. When their eyes met, her breath caught. As much as she wanted to kiss him, she was here to scold him about the shoes, and kissing him would send the wrong message. She looked back at the email.

"A quarter million of new business?" She asked.

"From the father of the kid you saved in Tahoe. Because you saved him. See, that's what I call a win-win, Katie. You did something for the right reason _and_ it brings in new business."

"That's awesome, Ben."

"You ruined a nice and expensive pair of shoes up there, and you deserve new shoes."

"I ruined _a_ pair. Not seven."

"So I couldn't decide," he lied, smirking. "After all, I like nice things, and they are very nice shoes."

"I-"

He leaned back, resting his head in laced fingers. "Though if you want to return a pair or two and stock up on thongs, I'm not going to object." He grinned at the image. "Much."

"You are terrible," she said, swatting his elbow as she stood back up.

"You love terrible," he said, smirking. "Do you like them?"

"I think you already know the answer to that. Thank you," she said, and kissed him on the lips.

She caught him unawares, leading him to lean into the kiss and unlace his fingers just a tidge too late. He was left in an awkward position, clearly yearning for more, when she broke off the kiss. She pushed his chair back and sat on his lap.

"Let's try that again," she said.

This time, he wrapped his arms around her slender frame and kissed her gently, mouth opening slightly. She joined him in the kiss, standing up before it got too hot and heavy, gently pulling away.

"You're welcome," he said, kissing the back of her hand.

She went back to her office and tried on each and every pair, but she wouldn't let Ben see how thrilled she was.


	16. Chapter 16: Forgiveness, pt 1

**a/n: Still in the post-Justin-dumping pre-Hey-Neighbor part of the Finale timeframe, but all new material...**

Ben stepped into Kate's office and sat down in one of her comfy chairs. She sat cross-legged on the couch with a client file. He waited for her to look up before speaking.

"Katie, got a few minutes?" Ben asked, knowing her calendar was clear. "I brought more coffee for you," he said.

"Sure." She accepted the cup, knowing something was up. "I got Rachel a new job today. Oh, and I hear R.T.N. has a settlement offer coming in for her, too."

"Thanks. I'll make sure I review it and present it to her."

"So, that out of the way, what's up?"

"I need your forgiveness," Ben said simply, hands spread on the ends of the chair's arms.

She leaned back and crossed her arms, smiling slightly. "Now what have you done?"

"Nothing new."

"So why now?"

"It's Erev Yom Kippur today, Katie. It's traditional to ask for forgiveness from others one has harmed."

"So what do you think you did to harm me, Ben?"

"The thing I'm least proud of this year, out of everything, is when you said Leo had told you that I visited his place. You said, 'I didn't know you cared that much,' and I said, 'I didn't.' That was a lie, and it's one of the worst things I've ever said to anyone."

"So how does this process work?"

"What do you mean?"

"I just say I forgive you? You bribe me to forgive you? What? Getting on your knees would help."

"Oh." He smiled apologetically, then kneeled in front of her coffee table. "Well, the point is to convince the other person that that defect of character, whatever it happens to be, is something the person is really trying to actively address. And, one hopes, has resolved."

"Well, I think we've gotten over that hump where you're willing to admit that you care about me."

"True."

"Which doesn't mean I forgive the pain you caused, because your lack of clarity only escalated into more Justin, which hurt all three of us."

Ben sighed. He couldn't say she was wrong, of course, but she had her own baggage on that carousel.

His phone bleeped.

"Don't answer that."

"I don't have to. It's a text message from my mother. She wants to know if I've asked for your forgiveness yet."

"Give it," she said.

Ben looked around to see if there were any bodies of water to dunk the phone in. Verifying there weren't any, he gave it to her.

"Enter your unlock code," she said, handing it back.

He didn't accept the phone back from her. "I'm surprised you don't know what it is."

She looked at the phone for a second, then entered 5-2-8-3. K-A-T-E. "Ha ha!" she cackled.

He sighed as she looked at his text messages.

"Wow, your mom's a noodge," she said.

"You say that as if I'm completely unaware."

"And you didn't tell me she was inviting me over for Yom Kippur."

"I hadn't gotten to that part yet."

"Well, I'm going with you. When do we leave and what do I need to know?"

"We're leaving in an hour, spending two nights, coming back to work Thursday morning. Five things: fast for 24 hours - no eating or drinking. No perfume or scented lotions. No bathing or washing. No leather shoes. Sneakers are fine. No sex. That's for tonight at sundown to Wednesday at sundown. My mother will expect us to sleep in the same bed, so please for the love of my sanity, wear something as unsexy as possible tonight."

"I can do that." He smirked at her willingness. She didn't even blink at spending two nights in the same bed with him.

"Getting back to the topic, Katie, do you forgive me?"

"No way, bucko. We'll talk on the way over."

She sent several text messages to Ben's mother, then handed him back his phone, smirking.

He resisted the urge to look at what she'd sent.

#

Ben and Kate fell silent on the Oakland Bay Bridge. "Tell me about your parents," Kate said.

"You'll meet them soon enough."

"But that doesn't tell me what you want me to know about them."

"True, but I'd be more interested to hear your reactions without me telling you anything."

"Fair enough."

"My dad's actually from Ireland, which you'd probably figure out as soon as you heard his voice."

"Have you ever been there?"

"We went some summers for several weeks, staying with extended family. Why?"

"Just curious. I've never been there. To Dublin?"

"Rarely. Dad's from County Tipperary, so that's where we spent most of our time. Have you ever been to Ireland?"

"Nope. Was on the list of places my father wanted to visit, though. We did go to England a few times." She stared out the car window and watched as Ben handily navigated the Oakland hills to his parents' house.

"Wow, this place is huge. I thought your parents didn't have money."

"They don't. I bought them this house from an elderly Norwegian man who'd built it himself - well, all the interior carpentry he did, anyway. Let him live in it rent-free for the rest of his life, then my folks moved in. I didn't tell them I'd bought the place until after he died, which was about two years after I bought it."

"What if he'd lived another twenty years?"

Ben shrugged. "He was about ninety, so that seemed unlikely."

The man who was clearly Ben's father, grey-haired with dark blue eyes and a neatly-trimmed grey beard, opened the door before Ben could.

Ben introduced them. "Katie, this is my dad, Eamon Patrick Grogan. Dad, this is Katherine Moira Reed."

"'Tis a pleasure to meet you, young lady," he said. "Mom's in the kitchen trying to prevent Armageddon as usual."

"Please call me Kate," she said, glaring at Ben for a moment before entering.

Eamon smiled at his son and whispered. "Firecracker."

Ben nodded and smiled. "You should see my back." He'd gotten the stitches out a few days ago, but his back was still a bit tender.

He led Kate into the kitchen, where a woman with intense auburn hair and Ben's brown eyes looked at them.

"Kate!" she said. "It's so great to finally meet you!"

Kate stiffened slightly.

Ben said, "Katie, this is my mom, Sarah Anne Grogan. She prefers to be called Anne. Mom, this is Katherine Moira Reed, who prefers to be called Kate. She only lets me get away with calling her Katie."

"Pleased to meet you," Kate said, a little formally, and Ben could tell she was stressed somehow.

"Are you okay?" he whispered.

She turned to him and clung, tears running down her face. "I've forgotten what it's like to have a mom."

Ben held her, completely unprepared for this turn of events. She'd always seemed so strong when she talked about her mom before.

Anne offered her sympathies. "Kate, I lost my own mother when I was in my teens. It's never the same, but I at least understand some of what you're feeling."

It seemed strange to Ben that Kate would open up to his mother, a complete stranger, but not to Lauren, the partner her father had picked after Kate's mother died. He'd have to ask her about that some day. He didn't even know how old Kate was when her father had picked Lauren, just that they were together when Kate and Justin had gotten married.

Kate pulled away from Ben and gave his mom a hug. "I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting that."

"It's okay," Anne said. "Do you need a tissue?"

"No, no, I'm fine." Kate recomposed herself in a few seconds, and the transformation amazed Ben. If he hadn't seen the slight makeup smear or held her in his arms, he might think those events had never happened.

"Let me take your bag to my room," he offered, going out to the car to fetch her small suitcase and his own small garment bag. He could tell by the wear on the luggage and its light weight that she didn't travel much.

She followed him into the room, surprised to find a plain room paneled entirely in cherry wood with a built-in bed and a simple white duvet with a tone-on-tone striped cover and matching white draperies. The closet and drawers were also built in. The opposite wall led to the ensuite bathroom tiled entirely in pale marble.

"Wow," she said.

"I had nothing to do with it; the old Norwegian dude did this all by himself. He really was amazing."

"I'll say."

Ben opened the closet, offering to hang Kate's clothing, but she took care of that herself. He hung his own clothing, putting the rest in the second drawer so Kate could have the top one.

"Thank you," she said, smiling at him as she started putting her clothing in the top drawer.

The small act of hanging their clothing in the same closet, putting their other clothing in adjacent drawers - it felt so intimate, so much like home for a moment that it gave Ben a pang.

"You okay?" she asked.

"Yeah," he managed to croak. He gestured at the unsexy fuzzy flannel PJs she'd brought. "And thank you. They'll be perfect." He hoped.

"You didn't see what I brought for the next night," she teased.

He barely resisted the temptation to look in the drawers and see what she'd hidden in there, but he was sure she'd manage to surprise him somehow.

"We're constrained by sundown, Katie, so let's go eat while we can."


	17. Chapter 17: Forgiveness, pt 2

The morning services were long and complicated, and Kate didn't follow what was happening particularly well even where it was explained. She tried to follow along, Ben holding her hand.

When the service ended, Ben said, "Now the really fun part begins," with such a lack of enthusiasm that Kate wondered what was so unfun. Then she saw three middle-aged women homing in on Ben, daughters in tow.

Kate rolled her eyes and tried to ignore the fact that other women were trying to home in on "her" turf, even though she didn't have a formal relationship with Ben. She stood behind Ben nervously, trying to be invisible and pay attention to anything other than the conversations unfolding in front of him.

After a few minutes of trying to think of anything else, one of the mothers, Elena's, said something interesting. "You kissed her when you were ten."

Ben said, "Really. That's the best you have? Do you have _any_ idea how many women I've kissed since then? Hell, do you have any idea how many women I've fucked since then? If you do, let me know, because I've lost count."

Ben started pacing. "Look, to some women here, I seem like a checkbox with a rather large wallet. No one's tried to figure out what makes me tick and if that's something appropriate for them or their daughters to live with."

He gestured toward Elena. "Elena, this is not about you. I'm sure you're a nice person. It's about me and who I am. As a kid, I lost a lot of fights. I lost a lot of debates. As a new lawyer, I lost more cases than I should. Then I got good at what I did. Winning became an obsession. Winning makes me happy. I'm just wired that way. Until about a year ago, my idea of a great time was waiting until I won a case and opposing counsel propositioned me, because there was something delicious about taking even more from the losing side. It was like winning squared. That's just the kind of jackass I am."

Several of the people were moving backward warily, and a small crowd had gathered in the corners of the room.

"And then I met Kate. She has a way of taking on impossible odds cases and making them work out. Things I thought there was no hope for. I was wrong, as she so often proved. Recently, she helped save a kid from being imprisoned for years for a death that was no one's fault. It wasn't even part of the official reason we were there, but it was the right thing to do, so she did it. She got vegetable gardens put in the California minimum security prisons because prisoners weren't getting any vegetables or proper nutrition. There's tons of things she's done for people in the time I've known her."

Kate came up behind him and put her palms on his shoulder blades.

"So when I hear people whisper, as I've heard in the last day, that I'm still available because Kate's 'only a shiksa,' all I hear is that you are being reprehensible. Do you have any idea how much she's changed me? One of my exes, a rather vindictive one, was up against Kate on a case. Kate asked me to talk to my ex, who picked up that I was in love with Kate. But I wasn't yet willing to admit it to anyone. And my ex pushed and pushed and pushed, and I did something that deflected her rage and nearly ruined everything Kate had worked for - just to protect Kate. I wound up saying to my ex, 'Winning is not everything.' And I meant it, too."

"Benedict Yancy," Kate said softly. Ben ignored her.

"I can't even tell you all of what Kate did during that case, it was that amazing. Several people's lives were affected, though, and it was important that she cared enough to do things right and get a criminal to turn herself in and keep another woman from being deported for something she didn't do. And she did. But most of all, she's wormed her way into my heart. I wasn't even sure I had one any more, but she found it, and proved it is alive. She is the most colorful person in my world. I never know what to expect from her, but in a courtroom's sea of drab colors and muted tones, I know that she will surprise me each and every day on several levels.

"The only thing in the world that means more to me than spending the rest of my life with her is her happiness. If she told me to never speak to her again and move to the moon because I needed to be that far away from her to make her happy, then I'd do it. I can't imagine life without her. I'm sure that if something happened to her, I'd wither and die. And-"

"Benedict. Yancy. Reed. Grogan." Kate said softly.

The use of his proposed married name stopped Ben cold. He turned to look at her, his mouth open wide. Tears ran down her cheeks and her face was bright red from embarrassment.

"It's time to go," she said.

"Of course, love." He put his arm around her and started walking toward the door. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she said, forcing a small smile. He reached into his pocket and found a tissue for her. He wiped her tears, then handed her the tissue and put his hand protectively around her waist.

"I kinda got lost in closing argument Ben," he said apologetically.

"I noticed that."

One person began applauding, then another, and another, then a bunch of people as they walked out of the temple into the small courtyard. One of the rabbis approached them, a woman about slightly older than they were, shorter than Kate with shoulder-length dark brown hair, dressed in ceremonial garb.

"Benedict, I want you to know that, as a Reform temple, we don't support the use of the word shiksa here. We welcome all, as you know, and we welcome interfaith relationships like your parents' as well as your own. Would you mind tellling me who said that so I may speak to them privately?"

Ben whispered into the rabbi's ear.

"Thank you. I'll be discreet about it. May you be happy, both of you. Though, Benedict, you did the atonement rather well, I think. Kate, I'm sorry that this intolerance happened as a part of your first experience of our community. I hope you'll be able to join us again on another, happier, occasion."

"I'd like that, thank you," Kate said.

After they got in the car, Ben looked at her. "Really?"

"What?"

"You'd like that. Coming back."

She shrugged. "The experience reminded me of something my father used to say."

"Which is?"

"Life is anthropology."

Ben started the car, and Kate put her hand on his arm before he shifted gears.

"I'd never ask you to go to the moon without me, Ben."

He took her hand in his and looked at her. "I'm _very_ glad to hear that."

"I forgive you, Ben. For, like, everything. I'm sorry I was, well, the way I was about it yesterday."

"Please tell me you're not going back to Justin."

"That ship has sailed, Ben. Surely you know that."

"I needed to hear it again. I forgive you for all the times that hurt, and all the other things you did to push me away."

"I'm not going to push you away."

"Please don't stop pushing me into walls, though," he pleaded.

"You mean like the elevator?"

"Yeah. I never told you, but that's hot. I love it. Especially when you're mad."

"Oh, Benedict," she said flirtatiously.

He grinned back.

#

At sunset, everyone in the elder Grogan's house went to shower and change before dinner.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to shower first," Kate said.

"Of course," Ben replied, disappointed, but noting with amusement that she didn't take her change of clothes with her. He stripped to his boxers and waited his turn, leaning against the wall next to the bathroom door.

A few minutes later, she emerged with only a towel wrapped around her, hair dripping wet. He sighed happily at the sight, then went in to take his own shower, returning with only a towel wrapped around his waist.

Kate had put on her slacks and was fumbling with her bra.

"May I?" he asked.

"Of course."

He smoothed out the straps and fastened it, kissing her softly on the shoulder, then helped her put on her blouse.

He suddenly felt awkward and shy. She'd clearly wanted some space, but he didn't know how much she wanted, and he needed to change. Kate turned to look at him and smiled. Then she leaned back against the hallway door and crossed her arms, never taking her eyes from him.

So that's how it was going to be. He smiled, put his clothes on the edge of the bed, stood just out of arm's reach, and began to slowly remove his towel.

The hungry way Kate watched him aroused him. By the time he tossed the towel on the bed, he had a full erection to show her. Her eyes focused on his need.

He took the long-sleeved grey t-shirt and put it on first, then slowly put on his purple silk boxers, pulling them up only to mid-thigh, then putting on his jeans the same way. Then he smiled and thrust his pelvis flirtatiously toward Kate.

"You want to help?"

"Oh, no," she said, amused, "I think you can handle it."

"So could you," he teased back, and she blushed. "It's okay if you just watch, Katie," he said.

They were interrupted by Ben's mother's voice on the other side of the door. "Ben, dinner before sex. Don't keep us all waiting."


	18. Chapter 18: Forgiveness, pt 3

_They were interrupted by Ben's mother's voice on the other side of the door. "Ben, dinner before sex. Don't keep us all waiting."_

Ben and Kate laughed, and Ben said, "Yes, mom." He pulled up his boxers and zipped his jeans, then slipped into his loafers without socks. He gave Kate a quick kiss, then Kate opened the door.

"She really gets you," Kate teased.

"Well. . . . No. I don't find being hungry very sexy. This is just the old mother vs. newly-introduced-woman dominance game showing you that she's known me longer than you have. Plus, it's intended to embarrass me, but I don't have the heart to tell her it doesn't work. After all, there's the possibility she'd find something that did."

"Speaking of hunger, any tips on what's good and what to avoid?"

"Nothing is bad, but you may not like it all. My suggestion to you would be to eat a third as much as you think you want and don't go back for seconds. It's easy to overeat when you're this hungry. There's usually two rounds of dinner, though. So try a light pass through, let it settle, then we'll go back for more in a couple of hours after, well, you'll find out."

"I'll find out what?"

Ben just smirked and raised an eyebrow.

#

Kate followed Ben into the dining room, watching him walk as his back muscles rippled under his shirt. She'd had no clue he could look so fine in a casual shirt, no idea he even owned anything like a t-shirt. Of course, it wasn't some normal cotton thing, but silk.

Kate had never seen so much food in her life for a family of four, but apparently the main party would start in a couple of hours and others would come over. She'd only tried one or two bites, but she'd tried everything. She could see why Ben liked to cook so much: his mother's enthusiasm was infectious.

After a light grazing through the food, Ben's parents headed back to their room. "See you in a couple of hours," his mother said.

Kate looked at Ben quizzically, but he just smiled cryptically and wrapped his arm around her waist. "We could go to bed," he offered, holding out his hand.

"Now?"

"No time like the present."

"In your parents' house?"

"Why not? They did."

"But are they-" Kate stopped, trying to frame the question.

Ben chuckled. "Oh, you'll have that answer soon enough."

She took his hand and followed him into his room, not knowing what she really wanted to do, but it had been a long, strange day and she at least wanted to curl up with him, maybe talk a bit more about what happened at temple earlier.

Kate took her shoes off and crawled onto the right side of the bed, and Ben quickly followed suit on the left side. He placed his hand at her waist, leaving her more room than she wanted.

"Closer," she ordered. He slid closer, the heat from his body warming hers. She put her left hand on his shoulder, feeling the muscles underneath his shirt. "I know why you don't wear shirts like this more often," Kate said.

"Oh?"

"They're lethal," she said, snuggling up next to him.

He tilted his head in curiosity. "To?"

"Willpower." She kissed him.

"Then I will get a dozen more and wear them around the house," he said, kissing her back and pulling her hips toward his.

She slipped her right arm under his neck and her left around his shoulders, then claimed his lips with her own, tracing the inside of his lips with her tongue, sighing with pleasure.

He traced her neckline with his finger, as he so often did, and she stiffened. He removed his finger promptly. "Sorry, love. Is something wrong?"

Truthfully, Kate felt like a teenager again, curled up on a cute boy's bed in the parents' house, afraid that the parents would know exactly what they wanted to be doing in bed. Except they were no longer teenagers, his parents seemed perfectly fine with adult reality - as was Ben.

"I feel like an uptight teenager about to be busted for being in your room."

"Well, I could tie you to the bed and make you relax," he teased, watching her reaction before continuing, "but I'd rather use less dramatic means." After he realized she was frowning a little, he added, "At least here and now."

He brushed her hair back with his fingertips. "What would be okay to do? Tell me or show me, tiger."

She felt like a very timid tiger as she tugged at the hemline of his shirt, pulling it up out of his jeans.

"Trying to get rid of the lethal?" he teased.

"Trying to make it worse," she said as he slid his hand under the hem of her own blouse. She moaned softly, then felt her back arching to his touch, nipples hardening.

She finally managed to lift his shirt enough to remove it, taking in his nicely-muscled chest with new appreciation.

"Mrow," he purred, slipping her top off, slowly but surely, just a hint of a tremor in his hands. She smiled at the unexpected nervousness he rarely showed except when it concerned her.

She buried her face in his chest hair, listening to his heartbeat, when she heard something else entirely. Ben chuckled.

Kate heard another loud moan. "Is that-"

"The elder Grogan date night. Yes. Specifically, my mom."

Kate blushed and laughed. She and Justin had never had sex at Justin's family's house, nor at her dad's place whenever they'd been there. In fact, she can't recall Justin's parents ever having sex. They were uptight enough that she'd once wondered if they ever did after Justin was born. Nor, for that matter, could she remember her own parents ever having sex.

He explained, "I'd wondered how much to tell you about that when inviting you, but you took over, so I let you find out for yourself."

"Gee, thanks, Benedict."

Another moan.

Kate said, "I've gotta admit, the sounds are kinda hot." Not just kinda, at least not once she was able to forget it was Ben's parents she was listening to. No question the sounds were having an effect on her.

"It's where I learned my appreciation for honest expressions of passion," he said. "Though it was torture when I was in puberty and not allowed out at night. Come to think of it, it was worst right after I lost my virginity and was grounded."

She laughed. "How so?"

"Oh, I got beat up by the girl's boyfriend in the process, so I was grounded for getting into a fight and getting pulverized. I don't think anyone ever told my parents _why_ I was beat up. Certainly, I didn't. I think my dad would have insisted I be ungrounded if he'd known. So there I was, grounded, horny, with a taste of what a good time with an actual girl could be, and - that. More of it because I couldn't go anywhere."

"Well, I'd probably still be grounded," Kate said.

The next moan was louder, more insistent. A thrill ran through Kate's body, and she suddenly unzipped Ben's jeans and started unbuckling his belt. So much for her plan of just sleeping together, no sex, tonight.

"Do I-?" he asked.

"Yes."

He got a condom out of the nightstand, and donned it with one hand while she removed his jeans and boxers. When she slid back up, he unzipped her slacks, then grinned as he saw the lacy little nothing she wore underneath.

"Katie, how long have you had these?"

"Oh, I bought them for this hot guy I've been seeing. Like them?" Kinda been seeing. She realized she didn't know what to call her relationship with Ben. That hadn't bothered her with Justin, when she was avoiding commitment, but it bothered her now.

"Love them." Realizing he'd gotten stuck looking at her red lace thong, she guided his face to look back at hers. "Focus, Benny. I need you inside me."

He moaned in anticipation as he slipped his hand down the front of her panties, slipping his fingers into her wetness, causing Kate to gasp. "Mmm, focus."

He moved his hands to slip off her her new panties, and she shivered with delight at his touch, causing him to smile. His hands slowed down, painfully slowly, causing Kate to squirm involuntarily.

"Bastard!" she teased.

He chuckled. "Some day, Katie, I'm going to spend an entire hour undressing you, millimeter by millimeter. I'm letting you off easy this time." Feelings flickered through her: fear that he would be able to do that to her, lust and anticipation hoping he could, fear that he wouldn't, fear that she'd enjoy it too much, desire wanting him to take her to places she'd never been emotionally, and terrified that he could do so. And, more importantly, would do so.

"Is that a threat or a promise?"

"Both, tiger. After you move into your new place."

"Okay," she heard herself say, smiling no less. Okay? Oh, hell.

Ben looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "You had the most interesting set of expressions cross your face," he said, sliding her slacks off her left leg. "What's going on in Katieville?"

"An hour. Really?"

"Really."

"No disrespect intended, but I don't believe you."

Ben smirked and raised an eyebrow. "Wanna bet?"

Her stomach tightened with fear. He was serious. "No, Benny. No bet."

He looked disappointed, and she smiled at him. "So why not do it today?"

"I can't wait that long tonight. Besides, making you beg for me in my parents' house seems rude to you."

She grinned playfully. "So you think you're going to make me beg?"

"Definitely, but not tonight." He smiled, pulling her down onto him and thrust inside her.

After only a few minutes, she cried out, shuddering around him, surprised at how ready she'd been for him. He thrust forcefully inside her, catching up to her quickly, a look of triumph on his face.

"I'm sorry," she apologized.

"Were you satisfied?"

"Yes. Except that was way too short."

"Satisfied is all that matters. We'll work out the rest." He held her in his arms and rocked her. "I love you, Katie."

"I love you too."

She curled up with him, running her fingers absentmindedly through his chest hair. After a few minutes, Kate said, "You know, I never owned a thong until after I met you."

Ben tilted his head. "Really?"

"Yeah. Guess I was just that stuffy about things, they always seemed a bit slutty. Anyhow, that fantasy about you chasing me around the room featured me wearing a thong, so I went and bought one. Then I was embarrassed by the purchase. Then when Justin came over, I hid them in my purse, which is why I had them with me in Tahoe."

"It's just underwear, Katie, something people see in private. If you enjoy wearing thongs, please do. If you don't, then don't do it for me."

"Really? I thought you liked them."

"I love them, but more than that, I want you to be comfortable with who you are and what you wear. Sure, try some new things, but I like confidence far more than insecurity."

"You know what?" she asked, tracing her finger on his chest.

"No, what?"

"I like your reaction."

He chuckled. "You would."

#

For Kate, it was odd being back in the office Thursday morning with Ben in his suit, careful formality between them. They held hands in the elevator and smiled once. Leo waited for them, cups of coffee for both of them, looking between the two for a sign of what might have changed, if anything. He furrowed his brow, but didn't say anything, and Kate volunteered nothing.

"You have a ten o'clock," Leo finally said.

"Where's the file?"

Leo followed Kate into her office and shut the door. "No file."

"What kind of mediation has no file?"

"The kind where it's not a mediation."

"Huh?"

"Robin Archer wants to meet with you. He said you could bring someone else from the firm with you."

Kate put her face in her hands. "Of course he does." She looked up at Leo. "He's not a good guy."

"You're so convinced of that, but he specifically wanted to disclose stuff to you and your choice of person to convince you that he's not who you think."

"Oh?"

"That's what he said. Since Lauren's out today and the best legal assistant apart from me just left on parental leave yesterday, I suggest you take Ben. His calendar's free today."

Kate walked into Ben's office. "Care to spend the day with your man crush and your beloved? Billable hours."

"What's Archer want?"

"Don't know."

He sighed. "Fuck it. I'm in." He smiled. "Otherwise, I'd just die of curiosity."

Leo called for Archer's car to pick them up; it drove them to the nearest building with a helipad, where they were escorted to the roof, flown to Marin, and flown to a ranch not far from George Lucas's old studios.

Ben helped Kate out of the helicopter, and they walked into the nearby oversized ranch house where Archer was waiting. "Miss Reed," he said softly, "thank you for taking the time to see me. Mr. Grogan, nice to have you along as well."

"Please call me Ben."

The staff poured tea for all three of them and they sat on floral print brocade chairs arranged around a large, low round coffee table.

"This is not one of my places, actually, but Kate was convinced that I was actually Paul Kaplan. I can see how that idea would prove to be appealing, but it isn't correct. Paul has agreed to meet with you."

"When?"

"In a few minutes. However, I must prepare you. There are reasons he isn't seen in public, and they will become immediately obvious. Please be polite."

"Oh, you know me," Kate said nervously, "I'm always polite. Especially when around the gross domestic product of several small countries."

Ben smiled, "I've learned politeness from judges. Sometimes the hard way."

Robin smiled. "Very well." He nodded to one of the staff, and a couple of minutes later, a hum came from just outside the door leading to the rest of the house. The hum got louder and louder until a cart carrying a frail and disfigured person entered the room.

Kate started to gasp, then covered her mouth and pretended to cough to cover her reaction.

Robin introduced his friend. "This is Paul Kaplan. Eight years ago - just before I bought an interest in Selex and some of his other firms - Paul was attacked. The damage was extensive, and he's needed several million dollars worth of medical care. The first million he needed access to, I provided personally."

Kaplan said, in a gruff, slurred, baritone, "Robin saved my life."

"In exchange, he gave me small stakes in his companies, which is why Lauren approached me, as you know. So, whatever questions you have," Robin gestured toward Paul, "here he is."

Ben looked over at Kate, who was still trying to recover from her gaffe. "So, Mr. Kaplan, why are you gunning for Reed, Reed, and Grogan?"

Kate added, "And what was the bogus land deal all about? Do you even care that two hundred households were evicted?"

Paul said gruffly, "They would have been evicted anyway, just a few months later." He waved his hand and his assistant brought a folder for Kate and Ben to review. "The building had been held off from condemnation, one exception at a time, for almost forty years. It was a deathtrap in the making."

Kate said, "So you did everyone a favor."

"For a price, yes. Was it my cleanest deal? No."

"So why try to get Rachel fired, then?"

"The delicate politics required that there not be a lot of public scrutiny, and Rachel was stirring things up."

Ben asked again about Kaplan's attitude toward Reed, Reed, and Grogan.

Paul said, "Now that Robin has told me his interest in your firm, there will be no attention. Robin, tell them."

"Paul's agreed to buy me out in exchange for some concessions. This is what I've asked for: First, that he no longer transact deals in Northern California and do _no_ business in San Francisco. Second, that he buy me completely out in exchange for that plus one dollar, which you will witness."

Kate asked, "Why?"

Robin smiled. "You know why. I love your partner and stepmother."

"Does she know you're doing this?"

"No. I'm doing this because I feel it's necessary to re-gain your trust. Additionally, I've committed to help you dig out the information about the building so long as it's used to satisfy your sense of justice and not so it can be made public. If your sense of justice requires that there be something further done, we can discuss it at that time."

"So the evicted families?"

"Are better off, at least the ones I've found. Rachel hadn't researched that part, but I have done some work. I'd like to hire Rachel to go over the details with the two of you, if you don't mind. I haven't approached her about it yet, but as Ben here is her attorney, I figure we can come to some amiable offer."

Ben said, "She's got a job offer already."

"I'll triple her salary for this job, and I can help negotiate a later start date if she still wants the other job. She's skilled enough that I was hoping to hire her as a researcher on my own staff."

Ben said, "I'll let her know about your offer."

Kate said, "One last question. When I told Ben the name Glen Graham, I made that name up. How did it get back to RTN in less than an hour."

Paul said, "I bugged Robin's jacket."

Robin's head whipped around in suprise and his eyes flashed in anger.

Ben smiled at Kate.

As they flew back to San Francisco, Ben asked, "So, what do you think of Robin Archer now?"

"He's trying to do the right thing, and I'm going to wait and see."

Ben smiled. "You know what?"

"No, what?"

"You're very kissable right now."

"Then why aren't you kissing me?"

Ben closed the distance between them, constrained somewhat by the safety belts, and they kissed for the remainder of the ride back to San Francisco.


	19. Chapter 19: New Neighbor

**a/n: This is the special "Happy Valentine's Day" chapter. I had a riot writing one part in particular, hope you enjoy. I think you'll know which part. :)**

Thursday afternoon, Kate took a cab across town to the escrow company, jittery about her apartment purchase. In half an hour, she'd signed everything with the escrow officer, who then gave her her keys.

She returned to the office, and sat on her couch reading a file for tomorrow's case, when Leo popped in with Justin's housewarming gift.

"Hey!" he said with feigned enthusiasm as she looked up somberly.

"This, uh, this came for you," he said.

She stared at the rather large package, then at Leo, but said nothing. He looked at her all the way out the door, then closed it. She sighed.

A few seconds later, Leo knocked on her door again.

"Come in."

"You know, I know who that's from and it's obvious you know who that's from. Need to talk?"

Kate sighed. "I don't know what to do. It's not something I particularly want."

"You seemed to know what to do about the shoes when you thought they were too much."

"Ben spent several thousand dollars on me. That was pretty clear cut."

"But you didn't return the shoes."

"No, I didn't. I knew what they were and how much they cost. This," she gestured at the unknown gift, "I don't know what it is. I'll keep it for now."

"Okay. If you don't want it, let me know and I'll figure out how to help."

"Thanks, Leo."

#

A few hours later, she'd moved everything into her apartment, and put the boxes in the approximately correct rooms.

She opened Justin's gift: a beautiful pair of paintings of angel wings in heavy relief. She fondled them, pondering Justin's line about courage being an angel, and she wondered if some part of him had known she'd be leaving him, and this was his blessing. Probably not, but the gift was weirdly appropriate, especially after the fortune cookie.

She hung the angel wings in her entry to always remind herself to be courageous, then started the music with a Norah Jones album, and poured herself a glass of wine.

She stepped put onto the terrace to take in her new view, only to hear a familiar voice.

"Hey."

He was so out of context her brain couldn't quite identify the familiar voice. When she turned to look at him, it took several seconds to realize who was standing there in jeans and a grey dress shirt unbuttoned one button, looking casually elegant.

"Neighbor."

Kate stared at him, mouth wide open. Despite her dawning horror that something way out of her control had happened in her life, she felt a swell of desire. Ben. How long would she be able to resist his quiche and his truffles? With him sleeping nude on the other side of the wall, all alone, night after night, how long would she be able to resist his bed?

How- "You set this up!" She accused.

He smiled. "You give me too much credit, Katie."

He had been walking around smirking, well, more than usual, for days. She'd just assumed it was related to some case where he was nailing opposing counsel to the wall. The other day, he'd seen her entering the elevator and blew her a kiss, something he'd never done before. Of course, she'd blown him kisses several times.

Now she understood: he'd known she would be his neighbor, and he'd planned how to tell her, and he'd derived way too much pleasure from anticipation. Not to mention irritation.

"I've got a ton of work to do," she said, starting to turn back to the open French doors.

"Katie," he pleaded.

"Not now," she said firmly.

"If you need a hand-"

"I don't. Thanks."

"Feel free to come by," he said, as if that weren't obvious from the smile on his face.

She unpacked what little she had, then took the place in: she really had no furniture at all. She hadn't needed any with the the boat's built-ins and Lauren's place. Everything she'd owned as an adult wound up with Justin during the divorce or was sold with the furnished condo they'd had.

Kate didn't know what else to do, so she called Allison.

"Remember that place you suggested I buy?"

"Yeah, when are you closing on it?"

"Already happened. Guess who my new neighbor is?"

"Someone famous?"

"Only on bus billboards before he joined the firm."

"No!" Allison laughed. "Oh, that's some piece of work there. Glad you didn't buy it with Justin. That would have been awkward."

"Yeah."

"So tell me, Kate, if you were in Ben's shoes and your financial positions were reversed, wouldn't you do _exactly_ the same thing?"

She thought about it, and she could see herself pulling the same kind of strings for a hot guy. "I'd have to be really sure, but yeah. Yeah, I would. Just for the reaction."

"There's your answer, hon. You're so used to bowling over other people over that you have no idea what that feels like for the rest of us. It's terrifying and exciting and flattering - all at once."

"How am I going to resist him when he's that close?"

"Don't. If his plans terrify you, you have only one option that puts you back in control in your comfort zone."

"Which is?"

"Be one step ahead of him."

Kate gulped. Allison was right.

They said their goodbyes and Kate tried to figure out what to do.

Of all the things she needed most, though, a bed was the first order of business. Tomorrow, she'd take care of that. Ben could even-

No. Best not go there right now. His car was convenient, sure, but bed shopping? He'd enjoy that entirely too much.

She sighed, thinking about lying on some bed trying to figure out if she were comfortable in it, Ben also lying there, head on elbow, looking at her, making silly comments about Thomas Jefferson.

Truth was, she'd probably enjoy it every bit as much as he would, especially the time and proximity.

She took a shower, changed into nicer clothes, and knocked on his door.

"Well, hello there," he said, opening the door wide for her to enter.

She stepped inside. Massive amounts of art hung on the walls. A pearlescent white leather sofa and armchair sat on top of a deep purple shag rug. Italian modern chandeliers hung over the coffee table and dining table, the latter made of some drop-dead gorgeous stripy wood she couldn't name offhand. The kitchen was well-stocked with hanging pots, mostly copper.

The focal point of the entire place, though, was the denim blue Venetian plaster walls with speckles of gold and silver. It was breathtaking.

"I'm not up for something dressy or complicated, but do you have dinner plans?"

"There's a great taqueria a block away. How does that sound?"

"Perfect."

He grabbed his coat and an umbrella out of the closet, then they stopped at her place for a coat. He helped her put it on.

He held out his hand, and she took it. They walked most of the block without saying a word to each other, umbrella fending off the light rain. She liked his hands. Ben took care of himself in ways Justin never had. His palm was soft and smooth and comforting.

And she'd better not think about the rest of him right now. Especially his lips. She'd really better not think about those hands caressing her body, either. Or-

Her breath caught, and he looked down at her, concerned. He withdrew his hand and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her into him. "Are you okay?" he asked, worried.

She looked up at him, his lips so near, unable to speak, mouth gawking like a teenager.

He smiled at her. "Wow, I knew you were hungry, Katie, but that's quite the look. I'm not that edible."

"That's not how I remember that morning in Tahoe."

He beamed. "Well, as fun as that would be right now, I suggest we get you a nice, balanced meal of tacos, complete with some vegetables." He tilted his head. "I'll take a raincheck on the rest," he whispered smugly.

"Who said I was offering?" Kate asked, slightly irritated at his presumptuousness.

"The look on your face, tiger." He leaned down to kiss her gently. To steady herself, she grabbed his coat lapels and kissed back.

He broke away first. "Focus, Katie. We're on the prowl for food." He turned away slightly, arm still supporting her, so they could continue walking. She put her arm around his waist and they walked the rest of the block to the taqueria.

Inside, it was colorful and brightly lit. Ben made recommendations based on what he'd tried, and Katie ordered fish tacos with horchata. Ben ordered the same, then they sat across from each other at a small painted wooden table.

Kate asked, "Do you come here often?"

"Wow, that sounds like a line."

"Shut it. You know what I meant."

"I usually eat out only two or three times a week. I like to cook."

"How long have you lived in your place?"

"Five years. I had a ten-year option on your place for four of those years."

"Why the option?"

"A few decades ago, our two places were a single, larger, place, so my goal was to make it one larger place if I ever got married and had kids."

"Which never happened."

"Kind of hard to when I haven't been on a date in about a year. Been too distracted by someone gorgeous, not to mention the new job. Anyhow, I told the owner I'd release the option early if you wanted to buy it."

"Thanks." Wait, was she thanking him for pulling a stunt like that? What had gotten into her?

She finished her tacos. Ben offered her his arm, and as they walked back to their building, Ben described some of the local eateries they passed.

They arrived at her door, and she invited Ben in.

"Wow, this is really minimalistic furniture," he said. Thank you Captain Obvious.

"I don't have any yet. This weekend's project is finding some."

"If you need a place to sleep until then, my couch - or bed - is yours. I also love furniture shopping."

"I need to sleep in my own place tonight," she said, "but thanks for the offer."

She walked him to her front door, then reached up to touch his face. "Gorgeous, huh?"

"Always." He brushed her cheek with his fingertips, said, "Good night, Katie," then let himself out.

She felt like half of her had just walked out with him.

# Progress

Kate couldn't think, the implications of the day rolling around in her head, especially what wasn't said.

Ben wanted to keep her close, that much was obvious. He'd held her place off the market deliberately for years. He had that kind of patience, which impressed her in one sense and terrified her in another.

And, of all the people in the world, he'd let her into that space. She felt like she was in the secret chamber of a dragon's lair, protected by the dragon.

Ah, hell with it, suck it up and follow Allison's advice. She went back to Ben's and knocked on his door, holding only her keys and phone.

He smiled when he saw her and let her in. "To-"

She shut the door behind her, pushed him against the wall, and kissed him passionately. He was so surprised, it took him a moment to respond in kind.

"I was over in my place wondering how I was ever supposed to resist you when you're naked next door every night. Then I realized I don't have to."

#

Ben had been expecting Kate to act wounded and long-suffering about his apartment ploy for several weeks before coming around. In fact, he hadn't expected to see her at all this weekend.

Suddenly, he found himself against the wall, Kate pressed up against him, kissing him. He moaned softly, and when she came up for air, he found himself saying, "Katie, Katie, Katie," like her name was a prayer.

"You've seen all of my place," she said. "But I noted that you didn't show me all of yours."

"True." Keeping one hand on her waist, he guided her to his bedroom door, then allowed her to step in first.

#

Kate wasn't aware she had expectations about Ben's bedroom until she realized that it wasn't at all what she expected. The rear wall was white like he'd just moved in, the furniture masculine and dark brown, and a taupe-and-white geometric comforter covered the bed. That much didn't surprise her.

Stepping in was the surprising part. The wall facing the living room was also Venetian plaster in a rich violet, the backdrop for three large pieces of tasteful erotic art: curves and lines of a male and female body joined, no naughty bits exposed, just comfort, love, and skin-against-skin nudity. Three very different artists, but similar sensibilities.

Then there was the bathroom, completely incongruous with an old building. It was set off from the master bedroom with a glass wall, modern rimless glass shower and vintage tub right up against the bedroom, and sink counter behind. Except for the toilet behind privacy glass, there was no privacy from the bedroom unless one closed the taupe dupioni silk draperies between the two rooms.

A tray across the tub held several candles, a bowl with soap, an organic sponge, and a rubber duckie. The whimsey of the last made Kate smile.

Across the bedroom, on the opposite wall from the bathroom was Ben's walk-in closet. The entire wall was mirrored.

She turned to face him, and he had a worried look on his face. He tilted his head slightly.

"It's very you," she said. "Except maybe the rubber duckie."

"I have a squeaky elephant if you'd prefer," he said. "I collect them from hotel rooms and Europe flights."

"It shouldn't surprise me that you're an exhibitionist."

"Not sure it counts as that given that it is my own place and confined to the master suite." He touched her face. "So, Katie, why did you really come over? Surely it wasn't just for a tour."

"Well, I'm fully dressed, I've got at least an hour. How about you?"

"Katie, that's just the opening act."

"For?"

"Making love to you all night long." Her breath caught, which made Ben smile.

He continued, "Tonight's a work night and we both have clients tomorrow. How about something less ambitious tonight?"

"Oh, c'mon, I know your biggest fantasy is taking me in your own bed."

He tilted his head. "Close."

She frowned, hoping his biggest fantasy wasn't too weird.

"Katie, my biggest fantasy is actually you taking me in our bed."

She chuckled and thought of Allison's words, then brushed her lips against his.

"Ben?"

"Mmmm?"

"Let's do this."

He kissed her neck. "I'm trying to."

"No. I mean us."

He pulled back to look at her face, smiling, head tilted. "What do you mean?"

"I mean I want to be your wife."

His smile grew into a grin. "Are you proposing to me, Kate?"

"Uhh, yeah," she said.

"And you're not down on one knee like you'd expect me to be?" he teased.

She got down on one knee. "Benedict Yancy Grogan, will you please marry me?"

He smirked, leaning down to trace the neckline of her dress slowly with his finger. "Are you hiding a ring in there for me?"

"Oh, like I've had time to go shopping for one," she said, standing back up.

He slipped her dress off, shaking it thoroughly. "No ring there." He pouted. "How about here?" He asked, running his finger along the edges of her bra, watching her shiver. She unbuttoned his shirt slowly, raising her eyebrow.

"You are, aren't you?" He started tickling her, removing her bra in the process.

"Benedict!" she laughed. "How am I supposed to undress you?"

He stopped tickling her and said, "Okay, I'll be good." His expression was so blatantly falsely serious that Kate started laughing, then unzipped his pants.

After he was stripped down to just boxers, he swatted her gently on the ass, and said, "Run, Katie!" And she did, running across the living room on hands and knees as he chuckled. After giving her a head start, he chased her, also on hands and knees, enjoying the view as she sped across the room, navigating around the corner of the couch.

Ben caught up to her in no time, leading to squeals of laughter as he pushed her up against the couch seat. "You ditched me," he said, sounding wounded.

"Get used to it," she said between squeals.

He slipped off her thong slowly.

"I see no ring here," he said. "Maybe you're not hiding_ anything_," he said, disappointed.

"Maybe you should check more thoroughly," she said sarcastically.

"Oh, I will," he said, thrusting into her warm wetness. His hands roamed her body, finally settling on massaging her clit with his right hand and her nipples with his left, bringing them slowly to climax.

After, he turned her around to face him, both on their knees, and kissed her

"Yes," Ben whispered. "Yes I will marry you."

After their kiss, he stroked her back and said in a small voice, "Katie, where's my ring?"

She chuckled. "Oh, Benedict." She reached over to tickle him, but sadly, he wasn't ticklish at all.

"Let's go shopping, love."

"Now?"

"It's only eight-thirty."

They got re-dressed, then Ben opened the car door for Kate. When he got inside, he asked her, "Katie, do you have any idea what day is coming up?"

"Ask Leo. I'm not good at calendars unless I'm micromanaged. Why?"

He looked forward as the light changed, then drove ahead. "Think, Katie, when did we meet?"

She tried to think back when the Manwaring case was. Fall, certainly. "About a year ago, right?"

"Last Friday in October."

"So in three weeks it'll be a year."

"I was thinking: wouldn't that be a cool date to get married?"

"In _three weeks_?"

"Look, I don't know what your first wedding was like, but it's a marathon freak show that's a torture test for event planners, let alone mere mortals. Katie, that kind of planning isn't your skill. Let's hire a pro and save our sanity."

"Justin and I had a small wedding, and Lauren ran the show."

"Of course she did. I can so see that. She's still so wrapped up with Archer, though."

Kate rolled her eyes. "I _know_. How will we find a venue in three weeks?"

"I have an idea, but it's not a traditional wedding venue."

Kate thought for a moment. "The _bar_? You're crazy."

"There's a stage, they serve food and drinks, it's a small enough place that won't seem too cavernous, and they're probably available for a price. Our anniversary is a Sunday, Katie, not prime bar time."

"The _bar_?" Still, she saw his point. They probably could get the bar. After thinking it over for a minute, she said, "Give me the night to think about it. Tonight's - well - tonight's a lot to take in."

After they parked, they held hands walking to the jewelry store. "Do you know someone here?" Kate asked.

"Back when I was looking for rings before, I liked their selection the best. Naturally, my ex hated them. Her taste wasn't your style at all - she wanted a ring that could signal UFOs from space."

Kate laughed at the image. "I _so_ know what you mean, and no, no it's not." Half her high school class was like that.

They looked around, but nothing caught Kate's eye. Ben gave her space to look, preferring to look at the men's selection.

"Anything?" Ben asked.

"Nothing that really caught my eye. You?"

Ben looked up at the elderly Japanese clerk standing a respectful distance away. "I was hoping for something inspired by Hokusai."

"What metal?"

Ben answered before Kate could speak up. "Platinum's my first choice, but any white metal." He'd noticed all her rings were white metals even though her necklaces were gold.

The clerk nodded, and said, "I think I have what you're looking for." She pulled out a tray from underneath the counter, pulling out a pair of rings for Ben and Kate. The woman's ring was a medium platinum band with deep-cut waves all the way around, small diamonds inset in each wave's curl.

Kate's mouth opened wide. "Oh, Ben, that's perfect!" _It just feels like this wave. . . just washes over you, but you're not afraid to drown._ And then Ben's response, _You want that wave._ And she did - then and now.

Ben held up her ring to her. "Is this what you want to wear the rest of your life?"

"Yes!" She was practically jumping up and down.

The clerk fussed around with getting the right ring that was the right size for each of them, and Ben paid for the rings.

Kate had the clerk take an iPhone photo of the two of them wearing their rings. She text messaged it to Allison with the message, "He said yes!"

Less than a minute later, Allison gave her congratulations, then texted, "I said one step ahead, not 53!"


	20. Chapter 20: Morning After

**a/n: **Wow, chapter 20. That's a lot of words. The first scene is an homage to Ryan Johnson's early morning tweet on February 15th.

Ben woke at four-thirty in the morning, as he sometimes did, a time when everything was still and quiet and dark. He could relax, stare at the ceiling, then fall back asleep.

This morning, though, he woke with a mass of wavy dark brown hair covering his chest, and the gentle breath of his new fiancée tickling his chest hair.

He laced his fingers behind his head in satisfaction, feeling the new ring that he wore to bed, briefly pondering the billion tasks they'd need to do together for the wedding, then dismissing them from his thoughts. He couldn't do them now, and the old Jewish saying, "don't borrow trouble" was a personal mantra of his. He liked to be able to sleep, and there'd be enough sleep lost for other reasons over the next few weeks.

Ben closed his eyes and willed himself back to gentle slumber.

#

Kate woke up in a new place in a new bed with new arms around her and a new ring on her finger, and the enormity of what had transpired the night before overwhelmed her. It wasn't like the kind of painful overwhelm she'd been feeling before things ended with Justin, nor with the deep pang of loneliness she'd been feeling since. This was mostly comfortable, just an awful lot of change for even Kate to take in.

The thought that struck pure terror into her, though, was the idea that Ben wanted to get married in three weeks. She hadn't even figured out how to tell Justin she was dating again - especially after having emphatically denied it - but she was going to have to tell him she was getting married. Dating was private; marriage involved a public record.

The ToDo list for the next few weeks would be impressive, though, but Ben said they'd hire a wedding planner. Good idea. Yesterday evening while they were out, he'd already arranged for their venue, so the bar was theirs.

He stirred, looked at the alarm clock, turned it off, then cuddled her close. "Good morning, love."

"Good morning, loverboy," she said, wondering what other cute names she could think up for him. Bucko came naturally given his love of money, but she'd initially meant it sarcastically and not affectionately. Darling only felt right after his full first name. She didn't like Benny because she associated it with Beth.

"Soon to be husband," he winked.

"I know. That means I'll get to take advantage of your naked body whenever I please," she said, running her hand along his side.

"You needn't wait," he said, running his hand along the flat of her belly, making her arch her back with pleasure. "You can come over here and take me right now."

She smiled then slid across to straddle him, leaning over to kiss him. "You want me to take you, hmmm?"

"It's my thing, Katie. I like being seduced more than I like seducing, though I do like both."

She smiled, and teased him with her hips, her breasts, her kisses until he yelped in frustration. Then she took advantage of him, her new favorite way to start the morning.

#

Ben walked into the bedroom with a cup of coffee for her and saw the look on Kate's face.

"Katie, what's wrong?" He sat on the bed next to her, putting the coffee on the nightstand.

She kissed him. "It's not you. It's not me. It's that I'm not looking forward to telling Justin. He needs to hear it from me." She put her head in her hands. "Ohh."

"You have time, Katie."

"Look, it's going to take him time, and much as I'd rather put it off, I'd rather have it done so he can blow off steam between now and our wedding." She looked up at Ben. "You know, he figured out I had a thing for you long before I did."

"I know. I heard him accuse you of dating me months ago when we'd finished the Chernof case."

"And then you asked me out to drinks and I got smashed and tried to seduce you. Badly."

"I don't have sex with drunk women, and I did ask you if you wanted to eat, remember. As for the rest, I wanted you as much then as I do now, I just didn't want to sleep with you until I was your first choice, and it sure didn't seem like it that night."

"Anyhow," she waved, "all that crap is, well, past. You know what I first saw when I woke up this morning?" She smiled.

"Tell me."

She held out her wedding ring. "It beamed at me."

Ben smiled, looking relaxed for the first time this morning, curled up next to her and took her into his arms. "You're right, that is the important part. Apart from work, what would the soon-to-be-Mrs. Reed-Grogan like to do today?"

"Oh, shoe shopping," she teased. "No, really, I need to get the right dress and shoes for our wedding, but I'd like to go simple and contemporary. Knee-length dress, probably look like something I stole from Lauren's closet. Hell, I might even check out Lauren's closet."

"You can wear whatever you want, Katie. I do like Lauren's taste in dresses, but you are not Lauren. Are you going to have someone walk you down the aisle?"

A thought popped into her mind, and she let it rattle around in her head. Then she started laughing as she had a brief flash about what she'd wear.

"Or, I could just buy some over-the-thigh patent leather boots." She kept laughing. "You'd probably like _that_."  
#

"Okay, tiger, I admit to a certain fondness for the look," Ben said, smiling at Kate. "I don't see why it's so hilarious, though."

Katie started laughing so hard she started hiccuping.

"What's going through your head?" He tilted his head in the way he did when Kate puzzled him, and that only made her laugh harder. "Would you please share whatever you're smoking with the rest of the class?"

"Catwoman," she finally managed to squeeze out between coughing fits.

Ben grinned so hard his face ached, but tried very carefully not to laugh. "I'd pay to see that."

Kate's laughter had subsided into giggles. Kate rolled her eyes. "You _would_ say that."

"Seriously, you're not with by-the-book stick-in-the-mud any more, and I have no problem with having a superhero wedding the weekend before Halloween, especially not if it involves you in tight leather."

"I don't think I can come up with a Catwoman suit by then," she said.

"Oh as if you couldn't just walk down to Folsom Street and yell out, 'Anyone into leather around here need a rush job?' Dozens of them would materialize with their black leather outfits trimmed with pink tulle tutus - well, those who didn't appear wearing only a half-dozen leather straps with their schlong hanging out. It'd be a madhouse."

Kate started laughing again.

"Plus, you have to admit, it's a really brilliant idea for getting Lauren far away from the idea of using our wedding as a platform for Reed, Reed, and Grogan public relations."

"I hadn't thought of that. I really am brilliant, aren't I?"

"And surprising. Besides, you _know_ Leo would help, and I'm sure he knows people."

"So you're in?"

"Yes, with two conditions."

"Which are?"

"I'm not dressing up as Robin or any villain or sidekick. Batman, yes; Robin, no."

Kate giggled and coughed. "Fair enough. Second condition?"

"Justin walks you down the aisle."

"Oh, no no no no." She shook her head, then a curious look crossed her face, and she looked at Ben. "Why Justin?"

"Because it amuses me to have everyone see what a ridiculously beautiful and hot wife he gave up, especially when she's dressed as Catwoman. Plus there's something metaphorically cool about the ex-husband leading the wife to the new husband."

"If he says no?"

"I'll resort to baser methods you'd rather not hear about."

Katie frowned. "That sounds harsh."

"I'm not talking violence. Dude creamed two attackers. I'd be an idiot to try that, especially with an ADA. I'm talking cold, hard cash. Or maybe a couple of actually decent suits for his new job and maybe some ties that don't suck high school prom dick."

"Ugh," she said, turning away.

"See? I told you you didn't want to hear it," he whispered in her ear. "Now, you've gotten me all worked up again." He rubbed up against her then kissed her neck. "Want to do something about it?"

"Mmmhmm," she smiled.

#

They managed to make it to work on time, and Leo was waiting with a cup of coffee for each of them.

Leo asked Kate, "So how's the new place? I'm kind of surprised you didn't call last night."

"Oh, I'm all moved in, except I have no furniture."

"Shocker." Leo looked at Kate's hand as she held the cup. "There's something you're not telling me."

Kate realized she'd forgotten to take off her ring. She held it out for Leo to see.

"Ben finally ask you?"

Kate blushed, wondering how exactly to explain the proposal, as she was sure she'd have to, over and over. She turned to Ben and looked pleadingly into his eyes.

"Don't look at me, Leo asked you. Besides, I want to hear how you explain it."

Kate sighed. "You don't want the real story, 'cause it's kinda dirty, but Ben basically teased me into asking him."

Ben snickered. "Kinda dirty?"

Leo laughed. "That sounds like Ben. Does Lauren know yet?"

"No, and aside from Ben's parents, she'll be the only person we tell until I talk to Justin sometime this weekend. Not looking forward to that conversation."

"Speaking of, he called once yesterday after you'd left, then called once already this morning."

"Jeez, can't he give it a rest? We're not together any more. He could join the twenty-first century and use email or something."

Leo drummed his fingers on his desk awkwardly. "Kate, what he wants to say he won't say in email, you know that."

"Ugh. I'm just so done with that."

"I know. Please tell me you'll tell him this weekend? Because dealing with your ex when you're not is my absolute _favorite_ part of my job. Not."

"I promise, so long as I can reach him."

Leo rolled his eyes then looked pleadingly at Ben.

"She'll reach him," Ben promised.

Leo relaxed visibly.

#

Ben and Kate walked into Lauren's office. She was studying a printed spreadsheet from a client's doc requests. She put a ruler down to mark her place on the page and looked up.

"What's up? We don't have a meeting, do we?"

Ben said, "I know this is kind of strange and Kate's going to object to me asking, but may I have your stepdaughter's hand in marriage?"

Kate's mouth dropped and she stared at Ben. "Hey, I was the one who proposed. I should be asking your folks."

Lauren looked at the two of them. "Well, this is unexpected news. I didn't know you two were that close."

Kate laughed. "Oh, we're not. I still mostly hate him." She caught Ben's wounded look and added, "I'm kidding. I fell for him."

To Ben, Lauren said, "About your question, yes, yes of course. Congratulations, both of you." To Kate, she asked, "Have you-"

"Not yet," Kate said. Ugh. That was going to be everyone's question, wasn't it? "Look, I'll call him this weekend. I already promised Leo."

"Good. Got a date?"

Kate told her the date and the venue.

"Wow, rings, date, and a venue already. That's impressive." Lauren opened her phone only to discover there was already a calendar invite for the date and time, which she accepted. "I see Leo's already on the ball with the invitation."

"This is Ben we're talking about," Kate admitted. "You remember my last wedding."

"Yeah, kinda impromptu. Got a wedding planner this time? I'm overwhelmed with work or I'd offer to help."

"We'll get one," Kate promised. With that, Ben and Kate headed back to their offices.

Leo had a huge floral arrangement of pink roses on his desk. "Kate, I would very much like this not to happen again."

The color drained out of Kate's face. "Oh. No."

"Oh. Yes."

Ben tilted his head. "Justin?"

Kate and Leo nodded.

Kate asked, "How many associates do we have right now?"

"One fewer than the number of flowers," Leo said.

"Great. I'll make the rounds."

"I could do it," he offered.

"No, this is my job. Thanks, Leo." She sighed and picked up the arrangement, heading to each associate's office, handing each a pink rose and some greenery. The last she gave to Lauren.

Lauren said, "Justin doesn't give up easily, I see."

"Well, he does, but he usually tries to get me to forget that. Not this time."

Kate took the vase into the company kitchen, dumped the water and remaining greenery, then put it on the counter with a note, "Free to good home."

Kate said, "Leo, dearest, could you get me the list of our employees?"

"It shall be done."

Ben popped his head out. "Wedding planner's meeting us here at noon."

So it began. Kate went into her mediation between feuding brothers with more than the usual spring in her step.

#

After the meeting with the wedding planner, Lauren pulled Ben and Kate into her office. When they arrived, Ben was surprised to see Robin Archer there. From the look on Kate's face, so was she.

"Well, Robin, nice to see you again."

"Ben, Kate," Robin nodded at each of them. "I hear congratulations are in order."

"You told him?" Kate sounded wounded.

Lauren soothed, "Well, I was hoping you'd invite me to your wedding, Kate, and I needed to see if he was available that day."

"It'd mean returning home from London a day early, but I'm happy to do it for the three of you," Robin said. "But that's not why we're here."

Kate jutted out her chin. "Then why are we here?"

"So that I can change my attorney of record for my various firms. Given my involvement with Lauren, that can be a conflict of interest, so I'd like to spread some to you two. For Kate, that'd mostly be mediations, of which I have a lot at times. Also, Kate, as you think I'm not aboveboard, this would give you access to everything."

"Everything?"

"Everything. Except for the much-rumored nude photos of me, I'm afraid."

Kate snorted. "Those I can live without."


	21. Chapter 21: Making Plans

**a/n: **Stupid family stuff has slowed down my writing and I haven't been in the mood to write certain kinds of scenes. This is a short stopgap chapter while I'm finishing the next (M-rated) one.

**Chapter 21: Making Plans**

Ben took Kate to one of his favorite San Francisco establishments, Restaurant Lulu, tossing the Vantage's keys to the valet before they headed in for their reservation. It was a cold night, so Ben was glad they got seated toward the back near the wood-fired ovens and away from the door and its draft.

Katie was on edge when their appetizer, a leek, goat cheese, and bacon tart, arrived. Between bites, Ben grabbed her left hand under the table, only to find it ice cold.

"Something wrong, Katie?"

She looked up at him, and he saw fear and concern in her eyes. He brushed her face with his fingers.

"I'm scared, Ben."

"About?"

"Tonight. This weekend, especially Justin. Getting remarried. Everything."

"What scares you about tonight?"

"That you'll push too far."

"Are you afraid I don't know what I'm doing?"

"No." She looked down. "I'm afraid you do."

Despite himself, Ben smiled. "I'm not going to hurt you, Katie."

"It's not that. It's that I don't want to be in thrall to you."

"Katie, I like strong women. You being in thrall isn't what I want either." Except, he had to admit, for a few moments now and again, and he was equal opportunity in that regard. Now did not seem timely for that confession, though. He tilted his head. "What has you so freaked?"

"Lauren. Remember your line about aftermarket accessories?"

"Yeah?"

"Let's just say: one stop short of siege equipment."

"No thank you for that image, I'm sure the one in my head probably came from 4chan." Ben chugged half his glass of water just to get the imaginary taste out of his mouth. "I dated a woman who might have been that type. Fortunately, if she was into that, I was spared. I don't want to judge other people's fun, but the entirety of my toy collection is six silk scarves." Though it hadn't always been that limited, true, and there were multi-purpose things one could use, like ties. Ben had just ruined too many over the years. Fortunately, they were mostly the bad ties from his early years.

"Why six?"

He tilted his head and shrugged, smiling ever so slightly. "Twenty-four seemed excessive."

She didn't say anything, just played with the food on her plate. She looked a little bit more relaxed, but still nervous.

Ben leaned over and spoke softly into her ear. "Katie?"

"Mmm?"

"Unless I'm very wrong about you, I'm guessing you'd very much like to hold me on the brink of orgasm for an hour, begging for your mercy."

A complicated smile crossed her face and she tilted her head, but said nothing.

"That smile says I'm right."

Kate only raised an eyebrow and smiled more.

"How about a week from tonight?" Ben offered.

Kate shook her head. "How about tomorrow night?"

Ben chuckled. "Ever the patient one, aren't you? Trust me, you'll want the time."

She shrugged. "You know me, patience isn't my thing. Okay, a week it is."

Ben said, "Deal." So much for _no negotiation_, one of her original demands.

They returned to eating, but Ben noticed Kate smiling at him when she thought he wasn't looking.

"Still nervous about tonight?" he asked after their main course arrived.

She thought for a second. "No. No, I'm not."

Ben grinned. "That hadn't occurred to you before, had it?"

She shook her head. "No, but it sounds like fun. And it gave me another idea." She smiled again.

Ben suddenly felt like an awkward teenager. "Oh?"

She tousled his hair. "You'll have to wait a week, love. That was _your_ idea."

#

Kate's most enduring fantasy about Ben was her own damn fault, and it usually began with the phrase, "Leo, go home."

Back then, she hadn't wanted to admit her attraction to him, nor the effect her own inattentional blindness demonstration had on her, and she never _ever_ wanted to admit to Ben - or anyone - how many times she'd started from there and taken matters into her own hands.

But she'd always wondered how it had affected him, given how resistant he was to her attempts to derail his train of thought. In fact, that's why she'd become convinced he hadn't cared about her, because he was able to deflect her seduction attempts so well. She wondered if it was a fantasy they shared. She suspected it was.

Ben's suggestion about making him beg for her mercy, now that dovetailed nicely with her long-time fantasy. She'd have to think about how to make the whole thing work out. To do this properly, she'd need to plan, and Ben had just insisted on a week. Plus, starting in the office at the end of Friday seemed perfect. Maybe she could even tell Leo to go home. A cruel smile spread across her lips.

Ben picked at his entree and squirmed, which only made her smile more.

She said, "About tonight, I have one requirement."

"Oh?"

"My ideas and plans about next week are off the table."

Ben pondered for a moment too long, then a smile slowly formed on his lips. "Fair enough." He tilted his head. "Katie, are you feeling all right?"

She frowned slightly. "Yes, why?"

"You used the P word. About yourself."

Huh. So she had. She was looking forward to plans. That was new.


	22. Chapter 22 - Until Morning

**a/n: Heads up: smut chapter. And it's cherry blossom time here in Tokyo. It's also very very cold, so I needed some naked Ben to keep things warm.**

They arrived at Ben's place, and Kate ducked into her place to get casual clothing for the next day.

Ben wandered into her bedroom behind her, placing his hands gently on her waist, murmuring in her ear, "You sure you don't want to add extra layers of clothing to make things more difficult for me?"

Kate snorted. "Why no, Benedict, because you're never going to last an hour undressing me."

Ben raised an eyebrow and his smirk grew into a grin. When Kate had everything she needed, he put a hand on her waist and escorted her to his place. After hanging up their coats, he took her hand. "Would you like some wine? Or a drink?"

"I think I had enough at dinner, thanks."

"Let's find a place for your things," he said, noting the clothing she was carrying.

"Is there something wrong with the closet?" Kate winked, opening the door, showing two dresses already hanging there.

Ben's mouth dropped. Her stuff hanging in his closet, even if it was the closet space he never really occupied in case she moved in, that was incredibly hot. "Need some drawer space?"

"Oh, honey, I need a full dresser."

"I know. We'll get you one. I meant for tonight."

"Sure."

He opened the second drawer on the right, which was only 2/3 full, giving her the remaining space.

"Very neatly organized, Benedict." She put her underwear in the drawer, then went to hang up the shirt and jeans she'd selected for Saturday.

Ben hung up his suit jacket, belt, tie, and slacks, slid off his shoes, putting them into the orderly space in the closet, pulled the items out of his pockets, then walked over to Kate, who leaned seductively in the closet doorway. "I didn't know what you'd prefer to take off."

"Everything, love. Everything." He approached her slowly. "So you don't think I'll last an hour, do you?"

She shook her head. He held up his iPhone. "I have a timer." He set it for an hour and five minutes. "It'll keep me honest." He raised an eyebrow and grinned.

Kate snorted. "So, Benedict," she said, unbuttoning the cuffs of his shirt, "what do you have in mind?"

"Making you very, very happy."

Kate began unbuttoning the front of his shirt. "And what does undressing me very slowly and making me beg have to do with that?"

Ben smiled and kissed her. "You'll simply have to trust me and find out." He put his phone down on the nightstand and returned to unzip her dress.

"You'll never take an hour at that speed," she teased.

"Well, I never intended to spend my time on the dress. It's better to hang it up, right?"

"Yeah," she said, hanging it up after he'd gently tugged it over her head.

After carrying her to the bed like she was a feather, setting her down gently, Ben removed the top sheet and comforter off the bed, tossing them to the side. As an afterthought, he went over to the wall and turned up the heat. "Let me know if you get cold."

That moment, with Kate displayed on the bed, was the first moment Ben really had fully registered what she was wearing underneath. Sure, he'd noticed the black lingerie when he removed her dress, but, the dim lighting being what it was, he hadn't noticed the sheerness of it.

Ben took a lighter to the three candles on top of the dresser as well as several in the bathroom, letting the dim light rake across her body casting flickering shadows on the far side.

"That should be enough," he said, putting the lighter back on the dresser.

He got onto the bed next to her and said, "Now, where were we?" He kissed her gently, his tongue encouraging her to open to him, his touch encouraging her to touch him. At least for now.

She started caressing his chest, but he took her hands away. "This is supposed to be a night spent focusing on you." He got a bottle of massage oil out of the nightstand and put a couple of drops on his hands.

Ben took her left hand, kissed each fingertip, then nibbled along the outside of her hand while he rubbed massage oil into her hand. He kissed the inside of her arm to the elbow, kneading the knots from typing too much. then the shoulder. She started to squirm with pleasure as his kisses surrounded her breast, avoiding any area covered by clothing, fingers running along the edges tantalizingly slowly. She tried to move so his hands would reach her nipples, but he chided her.

"Katie, we're just getting started. If I have to tie you up now, it'll take _so_ much longer to undress you." She shuddered with delight and moaned, but minimized her squirming.

Ben changed to the other side of her, then took her right hand, repeating each and every motion so her right side felt as deeply loved and cared for as the left.

Every squirm, every kiss, sent thrills down Ben's spine. He looked over to his alarm clock: he'd only spent fifteen minutes. Crap. He needed to slow down a bit. Kate's breathing was already ragged, her nipples hardened.

"Turn over," he said softly. Kate looked at him. "I don't want to ignore your back," he said.

"My massage therapist fired me," she reminded him as she turned over warily.

"Well, I'm marrying you, so we'll just have to figure out how to make better use of massage oil. Besides, I don't think she was kissing you nearly enough."

Kate chuckled. "Not at all, actually."

"See?" Ben slowly massaged her upper arms and gently moved her hair toward the center of her back, then began massaging her scalp.

"Ohhhhh," Kate said in surprise, then moaned softly when she liked particular motions Ben made over her scalp. He then progressed down to her neck and shoulders, gently moving her bra straps toward the tips of her shoulders over the course of several minutes. When he abandoned further progress on the straps to kiss down her spine and massage her back, she whimpered.

By the time Ben reached her waist, she only sighed softly.

From here on, though, relaxation wasn't his primary goal. Arousal was. He crawled down the bed to start with the soles of her feet, careful to use enough pressure not to tickle, but not so much that it wasn't arousing. He nibbled at the back of her ankles, and kissed and massaged his way up her legs very, very slowly. By the time Ben started licking the back of her knees, she was squirming again, and it only got worse when he gently parted her legs so he could kiss her inner thighs.

Ben held Kate's legs down with his powerful arms as she wriggled underneath him. "Katie, dear," Ben whispered seductively, "this will take longer if you struggle." He licked, kissed, and gently bit, the last causing her to squeal with delight.

He kissed along the line of her panties, carefully teasing them down just a tidge every now and again with his fingers.

He glanced over at the alarm clock again; he had thirty minutes left. Perfect. Ben flipped Kate over onto her back. Her arms touched his, then caressed his, lnading on his shoulders lightly.

Kate's face was flushed, her eyes dilated with desire, her lips deep red. Ben leaned forward to kiss her, caressing her hair and face, letting her claim his mouth with her own, letting her pull his shoulders to her, giving her a few moments where she was in control.

He grinned when he noticed that her movements had returned her bra straps almost to their original position. More work for him to do.

"Katie, if you keep moving your clothing back, we could at this quite a while," he teased. She started to reach for her bra straps, but he shook his head and pinned her hands down with his own. "Allow me, please."

He nibbled her ear, down her neck, moving the straps with his nose as he kissed his way down one side of her upper chest, then the other. He slid his hands around to finally unfasten her bra, but left it in place, nuzzling her cleavage. He moved her bra up, slowly but surely, with his thumbs as he kissed and licked her breasts until she squirmed.

His kisses spiraled inward toward her nipple, tracing the areola with his tongue while she moaned, then nibbled her left nipple while reaching over to her right, pinching firmly as he rolled it between his fingers. She sighed with pleasure when he took her nipple into his mouth and suckled gently.

Slowly, he slid the bra up her arms as he suckled, switching sides occasionally, driving her crazy caressing her arms as he lifted her bra slowly, grasping her arms when she tried to free them from the straps.

"Allow me, Katie. Please," Ben urged.

When the bra was up to Katie's wrists, Ben wrapped it around them, binding her wrists together She arched her back and moaned. "Silk," she whispered.

"Okay," he replied, reaching over to the nightstand and pulling out two long narrow scarves, creating a loop with one. He removed the bra from that arm, then wrapped the scarf several times around her wrist, and finishing up the tie. "This is a French bowline tie, which is safest," he said, securing the other end to the bed with a clove hitch.

"Is that comfortable enough for you?" he asked.

"Mmmhmm," she said.

Ben repeated with the other arm, removing the rest of Kate's bra before wrapping the soft silk around her wrist. He confirmed her comfort, double-checked his work, then raised an eyebrow and smiled.

He kissed her again, made sure her head was in a good spot as she was less able to adjust her position, made sure all her hair was free from underneath her back and arms, then caressed her chest toward her nipples, stopping just short of her hardened points.

"Ben?"

"Mmmm?"

"I'm on the pill. You never asked."

"You're right. I hadn't." As a single man who'd valued his wealth and independence, he always took care of birth control, not to mention disease prevention, so that he knew he'd done what was necessary. But now he was engaged. "Are you asking me not to use a condom?"

"Yes."

Hallelujah. While Ben liked the consequence mitigation that condoms offered, he'd never been a particular fan. Safety mattered, though. "I went to make sure I didn't have anything I didn't know about. Dr. Moorthi ran the tests. All clean, not that I expected otherwise. Sure you don't want to see the papers before making that choice?"

"I'm sure. But thank you for going to the effort."

"Okay." He felt a bit awkward about her trust because typically he'd have wanted to see the evidence, but he was far more of a paperwork-in-order person than Kate was. Occupational hazard, unfortunately.

At that moment, Ben's alarm sounded. "Well, Katie," he said, turning off the alarm and running a finger lazily over her chest and abdomen as she writhed underneath his touch, "it's been an hour and you're not fully naked yet. Believe me now?"

"Mmmhmm," was all she could manage to utter, arching her back as he lazily traced a nipple, then leaned down to gently nibble on it. "Ben!" she cried out.

"Mmmm?"

"Take me," she said softly.

Ben shook his head. "You're not ready yet."

Kate whimpered, and Ben could almost see the thoughts crossing her face as she wondered how he'd arrived at that conclusion.

Ben slowly inched down her panties, kissing along the line of the fabric's edges, until she squirmed with delight. As the panties slipped down to her thighs and Ben's kisses followed, she mewed disappointment.

By the time he finally slipped her panties over her big toes, having drawn out the procedure toe-by-toe with admonitions to remain still, she was in a constant state of squirming and moaning, exactly what he'd been trying to accomplish.

As he kissed his way back up her legs, he gently parted her little by little, controlling how much she opened for him until, finally, she was fully open for him when he reached her soft folds with his lips, and she could no longer contain her squirming.

Ben used his broad shoulders and arms to hold her in place while he probed with his tongue, noticing the spots that were warmer or cooler, immersing himself in the musky scent of her arousal.

He listened to her moans, paying attention to her sounds and movements as his tongue enjoyed every millimeter of her slick wetness, circling lazily in toward her clit. When he sucked and licked, she jerked momentarily.

"Too much?" he paused to ask.

"Noooooo."

He continued, letting her squirm underneath him. When she was at the precipice, he held her there, backing off just enough to keep her from orgasm, tonguing her more intensely when her arousal started to slip, her voice a near-constant moan, pleading with him for more, more, more.

When he felt she was faltering, he brought her quickly back to near orgasm with his tongue, finally slipping a finger inside her to add more stimulation.

"Oh, Ben!" she finally managed, and then her moaning built into a constant sound. When she began to shudder, she cried out his name, sounding more like a bell than human.

When she finally collapsed, spent, her voice going still for the first time in over an hour, Ben slid up next to her and untied her wrists, then wrapping his arms around her. She clung to him, and he pulled the covers over the pair of them.

"It's all right, Katie," Ben said, moving one hand to stroke her hair. "Are you okay?"

She sniffled. "That was so. . .so. . .intimate." He looked at her face and saw tears rolling down her cheek.

"Sex done right is, you know."

"I guess I've been doing it wrong all these years, then."

He wiped the tears away with his thumb, and said, "The good news is, you don't have to any more."

She didn't say anything else, just sniffled a few times. He held her for security, but gave her the emotional space he thought she needed. A few minutes later, she broke the silence.

"Benedict?"

"Mmm?"

"Don't ever leave me."

"I won't, Katie."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

#

As Kate's security grew over the long post-sex caresses, she finally asked him a question she'd been wondering about over the year since they'd met.

"Ben, if you had taken me home that night, what would you have done?"

"You mean, aside from fucking you senseless?"

"No, I mean, what specifically would you have done?"

"Well, my personal mantra has always been that the woman comes first, so, with a woman I don't know, that always means oral first. Aside from that, I didn't have specific plans other than to enjoy the time together with as much satisfaction as possible."

"Huh." Kate's brow creased.

"Katie, why are you asking?"

She sighed. "Because I kept having to seduce Justin, he never really made a point of taking care of my needs. So when you said your biggest fantasy was me taking you in our bed, I didn't know what you meant by that. Is it going to mean more of the same?"

Ben held her close. "You know, Katie, taking me could take many forms, including your pushing me onto the bed and sitting on my face."

"You'd like that?"

"I'd love that. Truthfully, so long as we try to ensure each other are satisfied at some point during the evening, I'm happy with whatever happens. And, honestly, there will be days now and again where that won't be possible because we're human. But we could promise to do as good a job as we can, right?"

"Right."

"And I'm sorry Justin was such an ass about making you happy, love."

Kate sighed. "I don't - I'm not sure if he really knew how to make me happy. I don't think he was deliberately being an ass. At least, I hope he wasn't."

"Well, I'm still sorry, though I'm very pleased that I can do a better job. Speaking of which . . . ."

Ben pulled Kate on top of him, and she smiled as she slid his long-forgotten boxers off. "I think it's time to satisfy Benny."

Ben smiled impishly.

#

Justin arrived at Kate's door with two large boxes, one entirely filled with her shoes. Some of them he'd discovered in a box when he unpacked after they moved out of their condo, some she'd left behind over the last few months.

He knocked gently on her door, but had no answer. Given that she'd not answered any texts or calls this weekend, he half wondered if she'd left her phone at the office.

Then he heard the noises next door where some couple was having really hot sex. He couldn't really hear the man, but the woman made the most delicicious noises. Justin couldn't help himself, he leaned close to the door and listened.

As her noises got louder, Justin's gut clenched. Was it? Couldn't be. Sounded like her voice at moments, except she'd never made any noises like _that_ before. Hadn't she bought the place next door?

He wandered down the hallway until the couple was finished, set his watch for five, minutes, then knocked more loudly in the door, and said, "Kate?" loudly at the neighbor's. Hushed murmuring followed.


	23. Chapter 23: Oh Superman

A minute later, Kate answered the neighbor's door wearing her turquoise silk kimono, the one she'd worn so recently at Justin's own place. Justin frowned, then was about to speak when she interrupted him.

"Justin!" she said in surprise, hair a mess, sex flush blotching her face and upper chest.

"I thought you bought the place next door," he said.

"I did," she said without explanation.

Ben, similarly flushed and dressed in a far more conservative kimono, stepped up behind Kate, putting his left hand on her shoulder.

That's when Justin noticed the rings on both their left hands. Wedding rings.

"So you stole Kate," Justin said.

"You can't steal a person," Ben said. "Unless you're still stuck in the heartbalm statute era of alienation of affection or criminal conversation. Oh, wait, you can't be because it's not 1939 any more and _you're not married_."

Justin swung at Ben, but Ben backed away from the punch. Justin's knuckle just missed Ben's face. "ADA Patrick, you really don't want to do that. It's a bad career move, and you're the only candidate."

Justin looked at his hand like it belonged to someone else. "I'm sorry," Justin said. "I lost it for a moment. I heard a rumor that you two eloped," he said, pointing at their rings.

"No," Kate said. "It's . . . it's complicated." Ben's hand squeezed Kate's shoulder lightly.

"When-. When were you going to tell me?"

"Come on in, Justin," Ben offered. "Would you like some coffee? A drink?"

"Water, thanks. I came over to deliver two boxes of Kate's stuff." Ben fetched the water, put ice and a lemon slice in it, then placed it in front of Justin. Justin looked up at Ben. "This your place?"

"It is."

Justin snorted. "Of course."

#

Justin sat at the head of Ben's dining table like he belonged in that chair, and Kate sat on one of the sides. Justin's presumption irritated Ben, but he was not going to let Justin know that. Instead, he put the kettle on for coffee.

He felt uneasy about leaving Justin and Kate alone in his place under the circumstances, but Kate wasn't going to put her stuff away right now, and Ben wanted that off his mind. If Justin saw him bring the boxes into his own place, it'd only be worse.

"May I borrow your keys so I can put the boxes in your place?"

Kate gestured at her purse, and Ben felt around for the keys, then pushed the two boxes inside Kate's front door. He treturned, putting Kate's keys back on her purse, then sat down opposite Kate. So far as he knew, they'd said nothing while he was gone.

Justin growled, "What the hell is going on?"

Kate looked to Ben, pleading for help. "I'm here, Kate, but what you do or don't want to tell him is your business."

She looked back at Justin. "Well, uh, we're getting married. Ben and I, that is. I asked him last night."

Justin looked between them. "You just asked him. Last night."

Ben said, "He heard the rumor, which was really my fault," Ben lied. "Do you want me to explain that?"

Kate gestured, palms up. "Please."

"We were feeling silly one night after a case, and I was celebrating. For me, that means playing music in my office, and I'd pulled out a bottle to have one shot. Kate joined me, and we started dancing around my office."

"And I tripped."

"I was worried about her, so I took her to the emergency room to get checked out-"

"And I was embarrassed and didn't want him to call anyone."

"So I lied for her and said I was her husband when we checked into the emergency room. Apparently word got out." Ben shrugged.

"I didn't want to arrive at Lauren's with Ben driving at four in the morning, so Ben got me a motel room, and I slept there and actually took a day off work."

Ben noticed the shift from hotel to motel and her downplaying of the event in question, not that it was actually any of Justin's business.

"So, how long has this," Justin gestured between the two of them, "been going on, Kate?"

Ben tilted his head. "Is that actually any of your business?" What he said came out snider than he'd intended, but it was actually a serious question.

Kate said, "Good point. No, I don't actually think it is."

Justin started to interrupt.

"No, no," Kate said, "Hear me out first. Remember that conversation we had right before Ben and I went to Tahoe?"

Justin nodded.

"I said - and you agreed - 'We're free to just be. There's no promises, no plans, there's no pressure.'"

"But then I got back and said I did want to make plans. I wanted to make promises. I didn't want to settle. I didn't want for us to just be."

"You said what _you_ wanted to do. You _never_ asked me what I wanted."

"I assumed-"

"Right, Justin. You did. And you kept on assuming."

"But-"

"Pop quiz time, Justin. When was the last time I had an orgasm during sex with you?"

Ben turned to see Justin's reaction.

Justin gestured at Ben. "Do you really want to talk about this in front of him?"

"Yes, yes I do. So: when?"

"Well, last time we were together."

"No, Justin, that was the last time I faked it. When was the last real one?"

Ben's eyebrows lifted of their own accord. Now there's a talk he and Kate needed to have, obviously.

"I, uh-"

"Right, you don't know because you haven't been paying attention to what I've been saying. Even when it wasn't words. So you're right Justin. We're not the same people we used to be." Kate wiped a tear out of the corner of her eyes. "And, much as it pains me to admit it, you were right to file for divorce." Ben walked around the table, grabbing tissues from a drawer on the way, pulling a chair up to sit next to her and put his arm around her. He handed her a tissue and she wiped the corners of her eyes.

"And then there's the whole Claudia Alves case. Even though Ben didn't believe Claudia or my faith in her, he gave key suggestions and acted as her attorney. Then she throws a private concert for you and I - and you're there checking your phone! You can't even sit through a couple of songs. Claudia even saw that I was more into Ben than you, but she didn't pick up on that until she saw the three of us together."

Kate kept on, "and then you started telling me how I felt. 'This is nice, right?' you asked, then I asked you what, and you said, 'This. Us. Feels good.' And then I said, 'Are you asking or telling?' and you laughed. That was a serious question and you blew me off. I went and listened to Claudia and thought of Ben while you were on the phone. And then you insisted on apartment hunting and claimed it was my idea just because I said I didn't want to live at your place. What you didn't realize was that I was coming to the conclusion that I didn't want to live with you. Not again."

Justin blew up. "So you cheated on me. With all people, this guy."

"Justin, you were not listening to me. How is it cheating when we'd never agreed to be exclusive? Every time you tried to call us something more than I wanted, you didn't listen to my answers. Case in point: when Claudia asked us about our relationship, we gave very different answers. You never cared about what I wanted, you didn't question the answers I gave, and you never, not once, said we were going from seeing other people to being exclusive. And, for the record, how many people have you had sex with? Because for me, that number is two."

Justin let out a big sigh. "So that whole getting back with me-"

"Was about my being afraid, true, but it was fear about how I felt about Ben. It wasn't about you. You had to know something was wrong, didn't you?"

Justin threw his hands in the air. "I knew something was different, but I'd assumed it was because we'd changed. It felt better."

"Not for me. I kept waking up crying. I'd have strange dreams, like mediating cats and dogs with great crashing tsunami waves ending the mediation. I just wasn't brave enough to move forward. Then when we'd gotten back together, I wasn't brave enough to end that, either, even though I knew it was wrong for me and it was really hurting Ben's feelings. And I have to work with Ben."

"You both also need to work with me," Justin pointed out.

Kate said, "Yes, but your office isn't next to mine. Besides, I did get DA Davidson to bow out of the race."

Justin replied, "I still don't know how you did that."

"Kate magic," she said. "So here's what I want. Ben and I are getting married in a couple of weeks. My father's dead-"

"No, no, you can't ask me that."

Kate glowered at him. "You still owe me for cheating on me. _This_ is the apology I want from you."

Justin stared at her for a few minutes while Ben shifted uneasily in his chair. Even Kate began to fidget.

"I lied to you about one sexual failing. How long were you faking it?"

Kate looked down. "It started about a year before you filed. I'd get so angry over having to do all the work to have sex at all that I couldn't manage to enjoy myself enough to come. While that's not being honest with you, it's not like I went outside our marriage for sex like you did. I was just never happy."

"That's about the same time I had the affair, Kate. Look, obviously, we can't get back to the happy times. I'll forgive you if you forgive me, but I'll walk you down the aisle because your dad's not here, not because I want to do it. Maybe we can both be happier by moving on."

Kate nodded. "I knew you wouldn't be happy about this, Justin. I forgive you. You really need a politician's wife now, Justin. I'd be horrible at it and I'd hate it and you know that. You're growing in a new direction, and you need someone who's more with you than I ever was. Someone not off on her own trip all the time."

Justin nodded, then smiled. "Yeah, you are kind of a pain in the ass that way."

"Yeah. Tiger. Stripes. You know me. There's one more thing. It's going to be a costume wedding with a superhero theme. Don't blame Ben for that, it was my idea. Given that you've gotten the nickname Superman, that sounds like a good choice for you."

"What will you two be going as?"

"Catwoman and Batman."

"Perfect. A criminal and a vigilante."

"Be nice, Justin," Kate scolded.

"What's Lauren going as?"

Ben finally chimed in, "I'm hoping for Seven of Nine."

Despite his foul mood, Justin smiled. "I'd pay to see that."

Ben smiled and said, "I _am_ paying to see that."

Justin said, "Well, I just came by to give Kate back her stuff." He turned to Ben. "Take care of her."

"I will."

"Good luck, Kate," he said, leaning to kiss Kate on her cheek. "Do you mind?" Justin asked Ben.

"No, but thanks for asking." Justin kissed Kate's cheek and she hugged him back.

Ben led Justin to the door, said goodbye. When the door closed, Ben leaned on it.

"I'm so sorry," Kate said, "that was a lot of drama you had to witness."

"Look, I knew you came with baggage, Katie." He smiled. "I'm just not used to seeing the quality of the stitching."

"And?"

"It's very detailed stitching." He walked over to her. "How about breakfast in bed? Belgian waffles with strawberries and bananas with some sausage?"

"Throw in more coffee and I'm in."

"It shall be done."

Kate said, "Just one thing. Seven of Nine? Lauren?"

Ben chuckled and shrugged.


End file.
